CUINJALE 120 March 9, 2012 Share March 9, 2012 Alright, here's a big one. When you were yeast before Couldn't cook you in my rye You're just like a pretzel Your salt makes me cry You taste great with butter In a beautiful swirl I wish for a pretzel You're so f***ing pretzel But I'm a crepe I'm a weirdough What the hell am I doughing here? I doughnut belong here I don't care if it's burnt I want to have a roll I want a perfect biscuit I want a perfect scone I want you to bake these when I'm not around You're so f***ing pretzel I wish for a pretzel But I'm a crepe I'm a weirdough What the hell am I doughing here? I doughnut belong here She's running out of flour She's running out She runs runs runs Whatever makes you happy Unleavened you want You're so f***ing pretzel I wish I was pretzel But I'm a crepe I'm a weirdough What the hell am I doughing here? I doughnut belong here I doughnut belong here 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Rarity Pony 4,892 March 9, 2012 Share March 9, 2012 Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now. LRP's opinions are subject to change without notice. Fees and penalties still apply. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feather Spiral 1,892 March 10, 2012 Share March 10, 2012 (edited) A Japanese animal trainer traditionally wears a paw-kimono. My characters werewolves who looked human. My father would be too afraid to get stains on his clothes when cooking, so he'd always keep the flame weak and it'd take forever. To cook it short, we had to apronym. (lol verbing nounz) Even in Starfleet, the son also rises. - Chekov, about Admiral Julius Fesidas, in Star Trek book The Fearful Summons Edited March 10, 2012 by Derpth Fader the Ponith I take writing commissions. "Nerds build the world, artists decorate it, warriors protect it, leaders talk everyone into doing their jobs." -me, 3 Nov 2017 "That's not a pie, that's a pastry with an identity crisis!" ~Jeric Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Charlie 129 March 14, 2012 Share March 14, 2012 Did you hear about the famous pianist who was arrested last week? Yeah, they caught him fingering A-flat minor. /straighttohell 1 "If we have the courage to decide ourselves for peace, we will have peace." - Albert Einstein Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JellyfishJam38 0 March 14, 2012 Share March 14, 2012 Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a curtain. Pull yourself together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunny Fox 5,950 March 15, 2012 Share March 15, 2012 There was this tragic story in the news recently. A hipster was found drowned in a small tributary. Apparently, it wasn't mainstream. 1 Happy minion of The Fabulous One! Signature by Midnightive Check out my blog! https://mlpforums.com/blog/1083-sunny-side-den/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Envy 6,128 March 17, 2012 Share March 17, 2012 (I swear, this idea came independently from the from the post above) I don't like using public restrooms, that's too mainstream. 1 Everything needs more woodwind! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aureity 3,055 March 17, 2012 Share March 17, 2012 Yesterday, a thief broke a hole in the wall. The police are looking into it. A lil' Catherine <(^.^)> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spartan-Dash (MP117) 26 March 17, 2012 Share March 17, 2012 Why couldn't the 11 year old watch the Pirate Movie? It was rated ARRRR 1 Kill a camper then take his place -MasterPony117 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jadefire 2,797 March 17, 2012 Share March 17, 2012 I would've made a joke about anal sex, butt fuck it. *badum tish* 2 Ponysona bio, here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeverNeverland 1,940 March 18, 2012 Author Share March 18, 2012 What do you call a depressed pea? A blueberry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Charlie 129 March 18, 2012 Share March 18, 2012 Border? I hardly even know 'er! *rimshot* I heard someone had a stroke the other day, but now he's all right. *groan* I once had a substitute teacher when I was a kid that told me one something like this: One day the tomato was getting tired of lying around on the ground on its vine, so it went up to the tree and said "Hey, how do you stand up so straight?" The tree says "Geometry." (aka, "Gee, I'm a tree"). He told it better and it was funny to my 4th-grade self. 1 "If we have the courage to decide ourselves for peace, we will have peace." - Albert Einstein Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor XFizzle 8,669 March 18, 2012 Share March 18, 2012 The amputee was only sentenced for attempted robbery since the investigation proved that he was unarmed. 2 MLP Forums' resident timelord, sports dilettante, and purveyor of wit and humor~*Traveling Timelord Nonpareil*~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcato 2,143 March 18, 2012 Share March 18, 2012 Okay here's one my brother threw at me the other day. Brother: here have a drink. Silver: no thanks i don't drink. (Which isn't what he meant.) Brother: true don't need you getting obsessed with drinking. Silver: yeah i'm already obsessed with minecraft! Brother: yep, plus your still a minor. Silver:...HA FREAKIN HA. (Actually what i said.) Brother: heh heh heh. My brother is a trol in that way. It took me a moment to catch the pun. Miner=minecraft = minor=person under legal drinking age. 1 ~Relax and enJOY life. True joy is a BLESSING.~ ~Musician, poet, writer, and all-around storyteller~ Interests: Old literature, ancient history, MUSIC, fantasy, anime Best Pony: Tiaaaaaa! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guitarguru007 49 March 18, 2012 Share March 18, 2012 (edited) So a man walks into a doctor's office shouting, "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam!" The doctor looks at him and says, "Relax man, you're two tents!" Wakka, wakka...sigh Edited March 18, 2012 by GuitarGuru007 2 Made by: Vex3d (This dude is a genius!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akemi Homura 7,680 March 18, 2012 Share March 18, 2012 http://www.youtube.c...h?v=bJGItzuFkEM Haha! Anyone? Anyone? Negatively charged hydroxyl ion is OH-, or HO-. That's no HO. That's his wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkSlippers 14 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 This is kind of a cheesy pickup line/ pun... Look at that: all those curves and me with no brakes! Ugh. Someone used that one on me. I AM PINK SLIPPERS~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aureity 3,055 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 A pickup line, eh? Here's a couple: Hey baby, I wish I was the sine squared to your cosine squared so that together we could be one. One slightly less appropriate: Hey baby, I wish I was helicase so I could unzip your jeans. Sigh...some people at my school have too much time. 2 A lil' Catherine <(^.^)> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack0vAllTrades 54 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 This is actually a really GOOD pun, but whatever 1 "Life isn't divided into genres. It's a horrifying, romantic, tragic, comical, science-fiction cowboy detective novel. You know, with a bit of pornography if you're lucky" ~Alan Moore Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aureity 3,055 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 This is actually a really GOOD pun, but whatever Wut you did there. A lil' Catherine <(^.^)> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Champion RD92 8,658 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 I found these off some website: 1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. 2. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now. 3. It's not that the man didn't know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it. 4. I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it. 5.I did a theatrical performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keypassion 232 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 Luna can be a real Night-mare at times. 1 http://www.mlpchat.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunnymilk 40 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 why are radians better than degress? Radians have more pi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunny Fox 5,950 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 A man who runs a marathon barefoot will suffer the agony of defeat. Happy minion of The Fabulous One! Signature by Midnightive Check out my blog! https://mlpforums.com/blog/1083-sunny-side-den/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inactive01 5,299 March 19, 2012 Share March 19, 2012 Mario Party has so many horrible puns. Look there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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