Thorns

I'd hit you with a . . . Twenty nine and a half foot poooooooole!

2/10. Antagonise me.

I'll add a few notches to your belt then. Okay, Swift Quill, what do you do when you're not Quillin' it up? What are your hobbies outside of what appears to be penmanship?

The worst pain I ever felt. A retrospective. By yours truly. When I was but a wee Thorns, I was fully cognizant of that fact of what a handsome/beautiful young person I was growing up to be. I have strong memories of walking down the hallways in grade school before morning class began. I would stroll on through while flipping my hair back, dramatically cocking my head to one side or the other. Young men tip-toeing at water fountains would turn and stare as I brushed against their Spiderman backpacks; the water would keep on streaming against their face, but they would continue to stare, transfixed at my obvious beauty. Girls would close their locker and turn to me, eyeing me down with cold, jealous eyes as they clutched their pink binders to their flat chests. Teachers would raise their eyebrows as I made my way to my 1st grade English Class. As I passed a custodian exchanging out a light fixture, he let out a small yelp as sparks began portruding from the exposed cyclindrical socket within that small indention in the ceiling. Long story short, I was always good looking. My pain was that I could not legally marry myself. The end. 13/10 on the SCALE OF TORMENT.

These questions come out of pity. How does it feel to see the threads surrouding this one flourish whereas yours has yet to take off yet? Did you have your name legally changed into Swift Quill after your discovered your hidden talent? If not, then are your parents or someone they know burdened with the abilities of a Sooth Sayer that led to you being named Swift Quill?

Here comes another famous Thorns exclusive. I really love Swedish Fish. They're just really potent stuff. I love'em. They go good with any other treat. They're not sticky so I can work in safety. And gosh darn, they just better my image all around, don'tcha know.

I'll date them right now. Let's see, the fellow above me. Hmm. He's so 2000 and late. I got that boom, boom, boom, that future boom, boom, boom. Let me get it now.

I'd hit you with every fiber of my being.

Me? Making a rude and sarcastic joke? Perish the thought, friend. I am but a lonely person boarding the lonely train on my way to lonely town. Choo choo, CadenceDerp, Choo Choo. Make me a pony.

I think I saw something similar to this once. And not just swirling around in my toile- *sighs* Good work. I recommend curtailing the outer edgers of the ponies' outlines in a darker hue of whatever occupies it. Like hug the black line under the brown pony's, erm, head where it connects to the neck. Hug it with a thick bar of a darker saturation of brown. This will add shadow and thus establish a sense of depth. Don't be afraid to draw dark lines over some of FiM pony's usual facial features, such as the little crescent inside the ear, also there to establish depth and make it appear a little more concaved. Your ponies need pupils. You need to be a pupil to someone else. But all in all, good job. I certainly could not do any better (in MSPaint). Keep working on it. 15-25 minutes? You're a fast worker. Maybe you can create a rugged and brutally sarcastic pony for me some time. I'm interested to see what you can do with a little more guidance.

Ah, yes, I definitely agree. You've struck a chord with me, and now I suddenly feel imbibed with a strong sense of wisdom. I've never thought such an insightful post would make me feel so sagacious and aware of my basic surroundings. It makes me want to share a tale of my own! Why, the only thing I know that may be even more stupid than that occurence is bearing witness to something that is dumb, legally ambiguous, foolish, or any activity in general that could render physical danger to a human being . . . and not doing anything about it. There's nothing more annoying than idiots calling out on someone else's inanity while they themselves pose as a facilitator in every given circumstance. I once knew a gentleman who knew some moron who decided that drug trafficking in his classroom would be a great idea. Instead of standing up for what's right after assessing the situation and then taking immediate action against this Adolescent Amphetamine-whatever it was cartel, he rants like another moron on Facebook . . . once again yielding a small cult following who agree. A stupid problem in our society is that people often praise others for what wisdom they seemingly hold over others and for talking about what they should do . . . as opposed to what they should be doing and what wisdom they gain from the experience. Welcome to the herd.

Only if there were of legal age to date me and if I were 100% sure that they shower on a regular basis. You know how fickle these bronies can be. "LAWL. What's hygiene? Let me love and tolerate and suffocate you with my intense body odor."

I'm going to gather my children in a room and pull out my old dusty acoustic guitar. I'll dim the lights and sit awkwardly on a stool, tuning the guitar as necessary. Then I'll break out in song. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RaaVbWD3USI

I rely heavily on my keyboard to make snide, cunning, and rude remarks to unsuspecting victims. The anonymity of the internet emboldens me to act in ways I never would outside. The Keyboard also serves as a great way to help conceal my really dry sarcasm. By the way, I love you all.

I've been in a longlasting and beautiful relationship with myself for as long as I can remember. I never get into arguments with myself, I also know what to cook for dinner, and looking into my reflection is such a treat for myself as it is for everyone I come in contact with.

It's pretty important to dress snazzy wherever you tread in life. A well-dressed man or woman conveys confidence, success, ambition, cleanliness, maturity, and RESPONSIBILITY. Why would you want to be perceived any other way? People are silently judging you all the time. They take notice on a lot more things than one can inititally imagine; how the cuticles under your fingernails are uneven, torn and swollen red from too much gnawing, the yellow tint of your teeth and the tartar that rides the gums on the upper row, the length of your fingernails, how often your eyes shift, the subtle bounce in our step, the positioning of our head, the quality of one's hair, the (un)natural aroma as you slide past them, and even the way our arms seem to swing inward while we're walking. These microexpressions speak volumes about a person, and can mean life or death in a professional environment or when approaching a potential date. Just some food for thought.

A stagnant cesspool of mediocrity. What curse is it to have been mightily infused with the strong desire to wish to expand the minds of those who appear buffered to any improvement due to their agonising lack in the ability of recognising or even acknowledging their own intense levels inanity. Seriously, that's all I did in my youth. Whined. Kidding!