Things you don't understand about the opposite gender?

[Passion 3,484]

I'm starting to enjoy this thread a bit too much.

 

What I don't get is how guys that think that they're so "nice" and something different from those "bad boys" that girls supposedly date, are always the first ones to make sexist jokes and think they're funny and that we're supposed to not be offended by them at all.

 

(I'm not saying I was offended here, but this is a very general trend that extends far beyond this post)

 

You're making it sound as if men are the only one to make sexist jokes   I don't use them usually, neither do you I assume. But that doesn't mean other women don't. You'd be surprised.

 

I generally understand people and the things they do, but with men there are so many things I just don't get.

 

Ah-ah! I knew that men are not human in women's eyes. On the other hand, vice-versa. We keep doing the same 'mistake'... ...on purpose ^^'

 

I don't understand guys' excessive 'need' to fit into the 'manliness' stereotype, and also the pressure that they push upon each other to meet it (including all of the stigma attached to a guy potentially being gay).

 

I just find it all incredibly stupid, and moreover, flat out insecure.

 

I believe this was explained in earlier posts already.

 

So if intelligence is what put us at the top as a species, then why would it be different for humans as individuals? Why has intelligence's value suddenly diminished?

 

Very valid point from the logical point of view. I guess I can somewhat relate to that, it's harder to show off your intellect rather than physical fitness. Perhaps the answer lies in past, once more. That hunting stuff I've mentioned earlier.

 

Nevertheless, men are more prone to use logic (if anyone feels offended here, imma slap her D:). That's what makes us less emotional than women are. And that is the main reason to hear "You don't understand at all." from them too

Edited December 2, 2013 by Khajiit

[Mightymags 1,053]

 

Ah-ah! I knew that men are not human in women's eyes. On the other hand, vice-versa. We keep doing the same 'mistake'... ...on purpose ^^'

 

 

I meant that I understand general human behaviors that aren't specific to gender and I understand a lot of the things women/girls do, but I don't understand many behaviors that are more specific to men.

[crazitaco 596]

Ah yes, the male obsession with their own privates. I've never understood it, after all it's not like females are going around comparing theirs to other ladies'.

[Thrashy 2,800]

What I don't get is how guys that think that they're so "nice" and something different from those "bad boys" that girls supposedly date, are always the first ones to make sexist jokes and think they're funny and that we're supposed to not be offended by them at all.

Not to go too off-topic, but you say that like it's somehow a bad thing. Firstly, as Khajiit said, men are not the only ones to make jokes at the expense of the opposite sex. If you want me to get brutally honest here, I find it rather disgusting how acceptable it is for men to be portrayed as bumbling morons in just about every commercial you see on television, all the while these hypocritical, self-righteous pseudofeminists are the first to scream "chauvinism" at the first sign of a joke being made at their expense.

 

Second, everyone has a different sense of humor, and not all racial/sexual/gender-based humor is meant to be venomous - it's all up to individual interpretation, and I, for one, highly respect a woman who has the sense of humor necessary to find "kitchen" jokes hilarious.

Edited December 2, 2013 by Lowline Thrash

[Shanks 10,816]

This is the main reason why I have not had a girlfriend, or even a date.

That is tough for me too, I am confident in most aspects of my life but that wasn't always the case. Building up confidence is more difficult for some people but is well worth it, I am still shy in introverted in some respects women being one of them but I am going to get there. I think that much of the reason why men are expected to ask out women is because of the centuries of social conditioning where the man is expected to be dominant, due to feminism this has been changed in many respects but still seems to persist in some aspects of relationships and asking people out seems to be one of them. I think that men and women should be equal in all respects, I see no issue with men asking out women or vice versa it can be nerve wracking because both men and women have some fears of being rejected. I have these too but I am done with letting them get in the way of me getting a girlfriend.

 

 

 

The most confusing thing is why a large chunk of males seem to think they need to cloak themselves in a complete and impenetrable wall of masculinity.

I am also a man and I don't it either, most of my interests aren't considered unusual for a 27 year old man but I like them because I like not because I am trying to fit societies or anyone else definition of what a real man should be like. I like pro wrestling, dirty jokes and beer but I also like cartoon ponies. The sad thing is that there are just as many unrealistic expectations placed on women as there are men and I really think that if we got rid of them that both men and women would be much better off and would probably be able to communicate and understand each other better.

 

 

Ah yes, the male obsession with their own privates.

I think part of it plays into the whole insecurities about masculinity and part of it is because alot of men are concerned that if they are not big enough down there that they might not be able to please a woman. Women are fairly lucky in that respect as while there is nothing men can do to make theirs bigger there are certain exercises women can do to improve their muscle control and make themselves a bit tighter. Women have insecurities about their own bodies too though, so many of them think they are fat when they are perfectly healthy.

 

 

 

 I find it rather disgusting how acceptable it is for men to be portrayed as bumbling morons in just about every commercial you see on television, all the while these hypocritical, self-righteous pseudofeminists are the first to scream "chauvinism" at the first sign of a joke being made at their expense.

What so many people fail to realize that sometimes a joke is just a joke, so many people take themselves way too seriously and they are miserable because of it. That is one the many reasons why I can't stand political correctness because it forces people to take things way too seriously and just sucks the fun out of everything. There is a big difference between being respectful and walking on eggshells.

[Lagom 204]

To be honest I sometimes don't really understand how soccer can play such a big deal, but that's just my opinion. 

[Hansel 1,512]

I just don't get other people in general, to be honest.

 

People are weird.

[Fluttershyfan94 5,742]

Ah yes, the male obsession with their own privates. I've never understood it, after all it's not like females are going around comparing theirs to other ladies'.

They do actually, well at least their upper body. But regarding males, it might be because of the effects porn has had on how people view sex. So bigger the better, I know that there are some women that have surgeries on their private parts as well and both because they had to and also just for looks and I'm actually not talking about boobs. So I guess we're all guilty of that, of course regarding bigger the better it's all about knowing how to use it, size just helps.

 

I don't get it how most boys like football/rugby/boxing. Most people just get hurt all the time.

 

Competition, we're competitive the same goes for girls.

Edited December 2, 2013 by Fluttershyfan94

[Envy 6,122]

Not to go too off-topic, but you say that like it's somehow a bad thing. Firstly, as Khajiit said, men are not the only ones to make jokes at the expense of the opposite sex. If you want me to get brutally honest here, I find it rather disgusting how acceptable it is for men to be portrayed as bumbling morons in just about every commercial you see on television, all the while these hypocritical, self-righteous pseudofeminists are the first to scream "chauvinism" at the first sign of a joke being made at their expense.

 

I do take offense to "kitchen" jokes, and I won't apologize for it. At the same time, I won't criticize anybody for finding the "boys are stupid" jokes offensive, either.

 

However, I just want to make it clear that there is a significant difference between both. "Get back to the kitchen" jokes have a large history behind them. A history of discrimination and expectations on women that wasn't too long ago in history. In fact, it's not actually gone. I have not experienced it myself, but I have had friends who, while at their workplace, have been told by men that their place is in the home/kitchen, and that they shouldn't be working. No, that's not a joke.

 

When it comes to joking around about boys being stupid, and stereotypes that men are moronic, they don't have any such context. As has already been said by somebody in this topic, it is actually believed by many that men are more "logical". And guess what? Men dominate fields of academic research (that may not be the right word for what I'm describing, but bear with me. =P), as they always have. I don't see any REAL discrimination going on against men for behind the joke of being dumb. A man in academic research would never have a women or anybody else come up to him and tell him that men are dumb and don't belong in that field.

 

I do believe it's far too soon for any such jokes, if they should ever be made. But that's just me. I mean, when it is seriously believed by too large of a number, and most certainly isn't a mere distant notion in history, it's not always so easy to take it innocently.

[Thrashy 2,800]

I do take offense to "kitchen" jokes, and I won't apologize for it. At the same time, I won't criticize anybody for finding the "boys are stupid" jokes offensive, either.

 

However, I just want to make it clear that there is a significant difference between both. "Get back to the kitchen" jokes have a large history behind them. A history of discrimination and expectations on women that wasn't too long ago in history. In fact, it's not actually gone. I have not experienced it myself, but I have had friends who, while at their workplace, have been told by men that their place is in the home/kitchen, and that they shouldn't be working. No, that's not a joke.

 

When it comes to joking around about boys being stupid, and stereotypes that men are moronic, they don't have any such context. As has already been said by somebody in this topic, it is actually believed by many that men are more "logical". And guess what? Men dominate fields of academic research (that may not be the right word for what I'm describing, but bear with me. =P), as they always have. I don't see any REAL discrimination going on against men for behind the joke of being dumb. A man in academic research would never have a women or anybody else come up to him and tell him that men are dumb and don't belong in that field.

 

I do believe it's far too soon for any such jokes, if they should ever be made. But that's just me. I mean, when it is seriously believed by too large of a number, and most certainly isn't a mere distant notion in history, it's not always so easy to take it innocently.

 

I don't expect you to apologize for finding such jokes offensive, but it almost sounds like you're expecting men like me to apologize for making such jokes under the "you historically oppressed us" clause. And I'm sorry, but I never will apologize on the grounds that I, as an individual, had no hand in any of the aforementioned oppression in question, and I find it completely asinine to use the past as some kind of immunity to have anything critical said of you, whether in jest or not. Nothing will ever change the fact that grudge-holding is not a progressive mode of thinking - it achieves nothing except for keeping the barrier between men and women stronger than ever.

 

Humor, in case you are unaware, gets much of its effect from incongruencies between expectation and reality. The reason "men are dumb" jokes work for many is, as you stated, due to the fact that we're really not all that stupid. And regardless of how things were historically, the reason men find the "get back in the kitchen" jokes funny is due to a similar incongruency - being that now, in modern times, women are more independent than ever before. Unless they so choose, they do not enslave themselves to cooking, cleaning and child rearing nearly as much as they were in the past, and THAT is what makes the joke funny. To those who find such humor funny, that is - you don't, and I respect that.

 

But it seems as though you lack respect for those who do find such humor funny, and if that is indeed the case, then I'm sorry you're the type to allow the past to muddy both the present and the future for you. All I can say, with a heavy heart, is that inequalities between men and women will always exist as long as one side continues to hold the grudge.

 

...Because I don't much feel like getting slammed with an off-topic warning, I ask that if you want to continue this train of thought, please shoot me a PM.

[SparklingSquirrels 21,300]

Honestly, there are more things that I don't understand about my own gender. I mean, I'm female, and most girls... go through quite a lot; and I've always wondered, well, why bother? It's not like you have to go through these things (take periods for example. Why do so many girls who don't like them, continue to have them, when it's so easy to prevent them from happening?).

 

As for the opposite gender... I dunno; maybe the whole "need to act manly" thing, I guess.

Edited December 2, 2013 by PowerStar89

[BrainyBrony 252]

Well, I have a couple of thing that I don't understand about girls/women:

• The 'need' to wear make-up. They say it makes them feel attractive but they really don't need to. If anything, I think that girls look better without it, rather than covering their face with a mask of powder and gloss.
• A lot of them go for the 'bad and cool' boys. There are far too many girls in my school that go out with these kinds of guys, dump them, and then go out with the same kind of guy. This leaves the sensible ones to be single until girls 'grow up a bit' and choose more mature people.

But this is just my opinion, I hope that this doesn't offend anyone in any way. Feel free to reply with your thoughts, and I'd actually like a girl to try and answer them for me if they can. 

[crazitaco 596]

They do actually, well at least their upper body. But regarding males, it might be because of the effects porn has had on how people view sex. So bigger the better, I know that there are some women that have surgeries on their private parts as well and both because they had to and also just for looks and I'm actually not talking about boobs. So I guess we're all guilty of that, of course regarding bigger the better it's all about knowing how to use it, size just helps.

 

 

Competition, we're competitive the same goes for girls.

Girls may compare breast sizes sometimes, sure. But we don't talk about those nearly to the same extent that guys talk about their dicks. I dunno.

Edited December 2, 2013 by crazitaco

[Oblivion 20,266]

Mine is pretty basic, for one, I don't get why the majority women get so over emotional about every little thing....

[Stellafera 3,836]

 

I have always been baffled as to why the female mind is so susceptible to preconceived notions of cultural beauty and why women spend hundreds of dollars in the lifetimes in a vain attempt to replicate it. It seems, and I don't meant to be insulting here, but it seems shallow and makes me think that a lot of women don't had very much self confidence. I think that women shouldn't have to be so pressured to "look beautiful" and waste both genders time so they can look good.

 

The 'need' to wear make-up. They say it makes them feel attractive but they really don't need to. If anything, I think that girls look better without it, rather than covering their face with a mask of powder and gloss.

 

I think I look better with it. And that's the thing; I might be an outlier here due to my large confidence in my own appearance, but fashion and make-up and stuff are all things I do for myself and nobody else. I mean, it's nice to feel appreciated for my fashion sense, but if I'm wearing it, I know it looks good on me. That's why I bought it!

 

[Shanks 10,816]

 

A lot of them go for the 'bad and cool' boys. There are far too many girls in my school that go out with these kinds of guys, dump them, and then go out with the same kind of guy. 

I could understand wanting him to be a "bad boy" in the bedroom but if I was a woman I wouldn't look for a "nice guy" or a "bad boy" but I would pretty much look for the same thing I look for in a woman being someone who I share common interests and values who is real, genuine and not afraid to be herself. I can't really give you an answer on that one because it is just as much a melon scratcher for me but alot of therm will grow and look for someone a bit closer to what I just mentioned and those that don't will just continue to date douche bags I guess.

 

 

Girls may compare breast sizes sometimes, sure. But we don't talk about those nearly to the same extent that guys talk about their dicks. I dunno.

Maybe not but there are still a lot of women that get breast implants and other cosmetic surgeries when most of them don't really even need them. If anything more women seem to be getting plastic surgery than men, don't get me wrong if there was an effective surgery for making a man's ding dong bigger than probably just as many if not more men will line up to get the surgery as there are women today getting breast implants. I personally wouldn't because the recovery is really going to hurt, I won't be able to do anything for a while if you know what I mean, I am already happy with what I am packing and there is such a thing as too big.

 

 

 

Mine is pretty basic, for one, I don't get why the majority women get so over emotional about every little thing....

Much of it is hormonal so you can't really blame them entirely, women have very high estrogen levels especially during that certain time of the month or when they are pregnant or going through Menopause. This is not to say men can't get emotion because I am a man and there are certain times where I can get pretty emotional but estrogen isn't the only hormone that can inspire strong emotions testosterone which men have quite a bit of can mean increased aggression and hostility especially during their teen years. It is all a pain in the ass to control but thanks to willpower and high level thinking human beings have a greater capacity for controlling this than animals do.

 

[Oblivion 20,266]

 

 

 

I could understand wanting him to be a "bad boy" in the bedroom but if I was a woman I wouldn't look for a "nice guy" or a "bad boy" but I would pretty much look for the same thing I look for in a woman being someone who I share common interests and values who is real, genuine and not afraid to be herself. I can't really give you an answer on that one because it is just as much a melon scratcher for me but alot of therm will grow and look for someone a bit closer to what I just mentioned and those that don't will just continue to date douche bags I guess.

 

 

 

Maybe not but there are still a lot of women that get breast implants and other cosmetic surgeries when most of them don't really even need them. If anything more women seem to be getting plastic surgery than men, don't get me wrong if there was an effective surgery for making a man's ding dong bigger than probably just as many if not more men will line up to get the surgery as there are women today getting breast implants. I personally wouldn't because the recovery is really going to hurt, I won't be able to do anything for a while if you know what I mean, I am already happy with what I am packing and there is such a thing as too big.

 

 

 

 

Much of it is hormonal so you can't really blame them entirely, women have very high estrogen levels especially during that certain time of the month or when they are pregnant or going through Menopause. This is not to say men can't get emotion because I am a man and there are certain times where I can get pretty emotional but estrogen isn't the only hormone that can inspire strong emotions testosterone which men have quite a bit of can mean increased aggression and hostility especially during their teen years. It is all a pain in the ass to control but thanks to willpower and high level thinking human beings have a greater capacity for controlling this than animals do.

 

Which is why most law abiding men don't go out and rape a women when they get horny, lol, unlike animals...

Edited December 3, 2013 by ~SadisticOblivion~

[MissDashie 275]

I think I've got a pretty solid handle on how boys work..... Not like they're too complex!   Just kidding! But seriously, one thing I don't get, is why are so many guys so closed? With the exception of my current boyfriend, none of my exes or my guy friends ever opened up really. I mean, getting some guys to talk about their feelings is like pulling teeth! I understand that you're going for the "stoic" vibe, but it wouldn't hurt to open up sometimes! 

[Shanks 10,816]

Which is why most law abiding men don't go out and rape a women when they get horny, lol, unlick animals...

Indeed they don't, being horny can be a serious pain sometimes. That does remind me of another thing I don't get about women though and it is why some women decide to dress provocatively and yet still get angry when guys "notice" if you know what I mean. Most guys are very very visual, it may not be that hard to turn us on but there is one man part that usually gets hard very quickly. Don't get me wrong, it dosen't excuse guys from acting like jerks and expecting women to be living blow up dolls but I think it is reasonable to expect that kind of attention from dressing provocatively.

[Fluttershyfan94 5,742]

I think I've got a pretty solid handle on how boys work..... Not like they're too complex!     Just kidding! But seriously, one thing I don't get, is why are so many guys so closed? With the exception of my current boyfriend, none of my exes or my guy friends ever opened up really. I mean, getting some guys to talk about their feelings is like pulling teeth! I understand that you're going for the "stoic" vibe, but it wouldn't hurt to open up sometimes! 

 

Have that problem, in my case it's because each time I showed emotions when I was a kid it was looked down upon. So I quickly learned to just not show feelings. Then school took over and it wasn't any better there, I guess it's just because of this "boys don't cry" stuff. 

 

So the reasoning for that is childhood, I think it's different now though. Though personally I don't feel comfortable talking about my own feelings so I don't do so.

[Passion 3,484]

 

 

I think I've got a pretty solid handle on how boys work..... Not like they're too complex! Just kidding! But seriously, one thing I don't get, is why are so many guys so closed? With the exception of my current boyfriend, none of my exes or my guy friends ever opened up really. I mean, getting some guys to talk about their feelings is like pulling teeth! I understand that you're going for the "stoic" vibe, but it wouldn't hurt to open up sometimes!

 

 

Because we're heartless, cold, emotionless bastards, d'uh~

 

I honestly never wondered about this. I guess we don't like to ventilate things as much as you do?

 

We're more prone to simply sit in the corner, digest anything that has happened and move on, rather than live through anything that happens to us. And well, the fact that we're not usually emotional doesn't help it at all. I might come up with reasoning for this, but not today. Not with my horrendous headache. Can't even think straight right now.

[Zygen 6,066]

I don't understand guys' excessive 'need' to fit into the 'manliness' stereotype, and also the pressure that they push upon each other to meet it (including all of the stigma attached to a guy potentially being gay).

 

I just find it all incredibly stupid, and moreover, flat out insecure.

I guess its just kinda fitted into them from birth, and society has alot of people with these same things fitted into them. So when you get into society they only reinforce those manly stereotypes.

 

And people don't want to be excluded from the group, so they just get further rooted into the whole thing, plus you can get made fun of and stuff, and people don't really like it.

 

I guess its similar in a way to why some girls want to look super skinny and stuff. 

 

I don't get it how most boys like football/rugby/boxing. Most people just get hurt all the time.

Well, its competitive and idk, guys like sports.

 

Plus, testosterone, the main male hormone basically, is known to increase aggression, so that can be a part of it.

 

Not all are, i'm not that into it personally ;p.

 

Ah yes, the male obsession with their own privates. I've never understood it, after all it's not like females are going around comparing theirs to other ladies'.

Well, honestly i don't totally get it either, somehow guys think that having it be bigger means your manlier or something, but realistically it doesn't really matter that much. 

I don't quite get it though, maybe got something to do with hormones, and the fact men like to be competitive about everything.. 

 

Maybe its just some guys like to talk dirty and about it because they think its funny, some seem to be that way, i know alot who make jokes about their junk, when its personally not my thing.

 

Maybe i'm just crazy, or maybe its just some who care.

 

Realistically they're all generally the same size overall. 

 

And, well to be fair guys don't go around comparing theirs actually. I mean not that i'm aware of, i think they'd think of that as gay honestly. Plus thats a little odd to do anyways. Even looking at each other in the bathroom is like a taboo thing in the mens bathroom, so yeah. 

 

However, as far as the comparing you might hear about, they do like to tell, essentially stories, that are like ridiculous and totally unreasonable, like "Mines the size of texas!" something stupid like that.

 

And honestly i think it'd be kinda weird of girls compared theirs, i mean they'd like have to be naked.

 

Of course i'm sure some compare theirs... for whatever reason. And maybe their other parts to.

 

Even as a guy i don't get whats so great about any of those parts.. Nor why guys compare theirs, or even the girls that might.

 

So idk if i truly have an answer, maybe you'll get some kind of answer from my rambling?

 

My gosh.. I never thought i'd ramble about my privates... What kinda person am i? 

 

Honestly, there are more things that I don't understand about my own gender. I mean, I'm female, and most girls... go through quite a lot; and I've always wondered, well, why bother? It's not like you have to go through these things (take periods for example. Why do so many girls who don't like them, continue to have them, when it's so easy to prevent them from happening?).

 

As for the opposite gender... I dunno; maybe the whole "need to act manly" thing, I guess.

I'm a guy, but i wasn't aware there was a way to stop periods besides being pregnant, so unless you want to be pregnant constantly i don't think it can be stopped. 

 

The whole need to act manly thing is a society sterotype, which is reinforced since birth as i've mentioned before and others. Same with girls wearing makeup and wanting to be skinny and being self conscious.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I think I look better with it. And that's the thing; I might be an outlier here due to my large confidence in my own appearance, but fashion and make-up and stuff are all things I do for myself and nobody else. I mean, it's nice to feel appreciated for my fashion sense, but if I'm wearing it, I know it looks good on me. That's why I bought it!

 

 

See i don't have any issues with girls like you who wear it for fun, i'm sure that its all part of the experience or just for your own fun and looks, but i don't get the girls who wear it because they feel they're self consicious.

 

Plus alot of those put on wayyy to much, i mean i'm a guy and no expert, but when i can tell your face is noticeably whiter, i think its to much..

 

Personally i don't find makeup that attractive typically, but its not like i will reject it or anything either. 

 

 

 

I could understand wanting him to be a "bad boy" in the bedroom but if I was a woman I wouldn't look for a "nice guy" or a "bad boy" but I would pretty much look for the same thing I look for in a woman being someone who I share common interests and values who is real, genuine and not afraid to be herself. I can't really give you an answer on that one because it is just as much a melon scratcher for me but alot of therm will grow and look for someone a bit closer to what I just mentioned and those that don't will just continue to date douche bags I guess.

 

 

 

Maybe not but there are still a lot of women that get breast implants and other cosmetic surgeries when most of them don't really even need them. If anything more women seem to be getting plastic surgery than men, don't get me wrong if there was an effective surgery for making a man's ding dong bigger than probably just as many if not more men will line up to get the surgery as there are women today getting breast implants. I personally wouldn't because the recovery is really going to hurt, I won't be able to do anything for a while if you know what I mean, I am already happy with what I am packing and there is such a thing as too big.

 

 

 

 

Much of it is hormonal so you can't really blame them entirely, women have very high estrogen levels especially during that certain time of the month or when they are pregnant or going through Menopause. This is not to say men can't get emotion because I am a man and there are certain times where I can get pretty emotional but estrogen isn't the only hormone that can inspire strong emotions testosterone which men have quite a bit of can mean increased aggression and hostility especially during their teen years. It is all a pain in the ass to control but thanks to willpower and high level thinking human beings have a greater capacity for controlling this than animals do.

 

Yeaah, alot of people seem to forget that men have hormones to, and those hormones cycle to, and can cause emotional surges aswell.

 

I'm quite a moody teenage guy, so i guess that i'm either proof, or crazy ;p.

 

I don't find myself just crying randomly, but i do get sad, and angry, and all kinds of other crazy feelings. Crying is a different story, which i find almost hard to do, which really sucks considering all its health benefits.

 

So really guys and girls both have the emotional mood swings, its just girls have theirs with some added pain.

 

I think I've got a pretty solid handle on how boys work..... Not like they're too complex!   Just kidding! But seriously, one thing I don't get, is why are so many guys so closed? With the exception of my current boyfriend, none of my exes or my guy friends ever opened up really. I mean, getting some guys to talk about their feelings is like pulling teeth! I understand that you're going for the "stoic" vibe, but it wouldn't hurt to open up sometimes! 

Oh you ;p. Kidder .

 

As for the closed up thing, it varies from guy to guy to an extent, but alot of it is due to the manly stereotype thing. And talking about feelings means admit to things like sadness, which in stereotypical male society is considered a weakness and can get you bullied or made fun of.

 

Stuff like crying especially can cause this to. Since crying is also considered weak by alot of men.

 

Another of the reasons is some men just don't like to, its just not something they like to do i suppose.

 

This is partly due to the fact that alot of men just don't talk about their feelings really.

 

I mean as guys, you don't talk about your feelings with other guys very often, only a few guys really do. So unlike girls on the otherhand who talk about their feelings all the time, guys don't do that. This can make them feel uncomfortable about talking about their feelings.

 

Its just so out of most guys comforts zones as its not something they normally do, its like riding a bike your first time, or going to a new school, or something new really, you feel uncomfortable about it, and don't want to do it.

 

Thats sorta what guys are like with talking about feelings. 

 

And also some just don't trust as easily i guess, and again talking about feelings is pretty hard for guys alot of times, especially when your raised not to be emotional or cry or anything, and talking about feelings isn't something you do.

 

Throw in some nerves from girls(no offense, but guys can get nervous around girls just because.) and lack of experience and yeah. 

 

I'm not great at talking IRL, and i also have fear i guess somewhat to being embarrassed about or made fun of when talking about my feelings IRL and even to an extent online. 

 

And again crying and feelings are considered weak as a guy which is kinda dumb :/.

 

Of course i've cried before at school like when i first went there from being homeschooled, and once at band camp, but most of the time its frustration.

 

And i think both times was at band related stuff, and my band people are more understanding and i feel more comfortable. They even tried to comfort me, 1 or 2 guys.

 

but yeah, even as a more open to emotions guy i find it hard to share my feelings for some reason alot of times, and crying even when i want to is almost impossible. 

 

Sorry for the ramble .

 

 

Have that problem, in my case it's because each time I showed emotions when I was a kid it was looked down upon. So I quickly learned to just not show feelings. Then school took over and it wasn't any better there, I guess it's just because of this "boys don't cry" stuff. 

 

So the reasoning for that is childhood, I think it's different now though. Though personally I don't feel comfortable talking about my own feelings so I don't do so.

Essentially this is what alot of guys childhoods are like as they are raised. Mine included to a good extent.

[Thrashy 2,800]

I think I've got a pretty solid handle on how boys work..... Not like they're too complex!   Just kidding! But seriously, one thing I don't get, is why are so many guys so closed? With the exception of my current boyfriend, none of my exes or my guy friends ever opened up really. I mean, getting some guys to talk about their feelings is like pulling teeth! I understand that you're going for the "stoic" vibe, but it wouldn't hurt to open up sometimes! 

 

I can't speak for other guys, but I personally find it very hard to open up emotionally to women as a result of a pretty nasty heartbreak I went through not too long ago. Long story short, she saw my emotional expressiveness as "clingy", basically decided I wasn't man enough for her, and things went pretty far south. So I've basically made it a point to repaint myself as an emotionless tool (is it working? Eh? ) so that I can safeguard myself from ever falling into that spot again. Again, that's just me, though. I'm sure other guys who've had trouble expressing their feelings have totally different stories to tell.

[Zygen 6,066]

I can't speak for other guys, but I personally find it very hard to open up emotionally to women as a result of a pretty nasty heartbreak I went through not too long ago. Long story short, she saw my emotional expressiveness as "clingy", basically decided I wasn't man enough for her, and things went pretty far south. So I've basically made it a point to repaint myself as an emotionless tool (is it working? Eh? ) so that I can safeguard myself from ever falling into that spot again. Again, that's just me, though. I'm sure other guys who've had trouble expressing their feelings have totally different stories to tell.

Well, while i don't think you should totally repaint yourself as an "emotional less tool" i have felt before to lesser extent that people might think of me as annoying when I do express my feelings, just because I feel like i'm complaining.

 

Personally i'm fine listening to people myself, but i suck at giving advice i think.

 

But yeah, many guys have different stories and reasons for their more withdrawn emotional expressiveness.

[Cerise Hood 102]

Well, I have a couple of thing that I don't understand about girls/women:

• The 'need' to wear make-up. They say it makes them feel attractive but they really don't need to. If anything, I think that girls look better without it, rather than covering their face with a mask of powder and gloss.
• A lot of them go for the 'bad and cool' boys. There are far too many girls in my school that go out with these kinds of guys, dump them, and then go out with the same kind of guy. This leaves the sensible ones to be single until girls 'grow up a bit' and choose more mature people.

But this is just my opinion, I hope that this doesn't offend anyone in any way. Feel free to reply with your thoughts, and I'd actually like a girl to try and answer them for me if they can.

Well then. Glad to be at your service.

 

1. Well, according to a book I read, girls, and maybe everyone, look at and "magnify" everything bad about them. Therefore, the see all these little/imaginary problems and focus too much on them, so we want to cover them up. Or it's Halloween.

 

2. I'll try to remember to answer this question when I'm allowed to date. Until then, I have no idea.