If your boy/girlfriend or spouse changed sex would you still love him/her?

[Snow Frostflame 3,567]

Absolutely! I love my girlfriend for her personality, not her looks. If she ever wanted to be a man I would accept it, and still love her.

[Victoria Sponge 1,014]

If we weren't married I'd probably decide to just be friends, if marriage was involved it makes it more complicated, I would have to discuss it with my s/o.

[Discordian 6,013]

@@Midnight Scribbler,

 

At least you acknowledge that things are different for others. Personally I don't feel closer to my partners than during sex a lot of the time. There's something during that time that no other point in the relationship can replicate.

 

If I didn't want to sex them they'd cease to be seen as a love partner and simply a friend. There is a distinct difference between the two. The relationship I have with a girlfriend is different than that of the one with my best friend. While I wouldn't say one is necessarily more important than the other there's different expectations between the two for a heterosexual person.

[Guest]

but the fact of the matter is my boomstick whizzes for hoo-hoos, not ding-dongs.

 

lol, pure gold

 

But yeah, pretty much the same for me. 

Edited October 19, 2016 by Guest

[Derplight Sperkle 1,013]

If my girlfriend did tell me this, I would have to break up with her and then continue our relationship as a friend. I don't want her to disappear from my life, but I wouldn't feel comfortable date someone that feels that they are a man and may eventually become one.

[Kiri 7,277]

Hmm...I had to think long and hard about this. As another heterosexual person, I am only into males. Therefore, if I had a partner who had a sex change to become female, I do not think the relationship would continue. I would hope that the other person would understand what my sexuality is and respect it, as I would respect theirs. That being said, I would still love the person as a friend and would want to offer them support in the best way I knew how.

Edited October 19, 2016 by Kiri

[NotoriousSMALL 1,984]

No. I'd never date someone let alone marry someone who is one of those people who would likely end up getting a sex change. I just don't roll that way, homie. I'm not against it but I'm not about that life lmao, miss me with that.

Edited October 19, 2016 by NotoriousSMALL

[CheeryFox 23,811]

Something like that would disturb me to no end. It's no different from a bad Jerry Springer episode. If a person did that to me, the love would change to a platonic friendship. I wouldn't hate them - I'd like to understand what prompted such an action. 

[SparklingSwirls 21,261]

Nope, I'd end the relationship. We could still be friends, but I would no longer be attracted to them.

 

I'd be upset that they didn't say anything to me beforehand.

[Commander Tangent 861]

Wouldn't really change anything for me, I love him for who he is and I would be fine with it Though I guess it would add some complications.

[honk friend 1,972]

The response is really shocking honestly

I don't know what it's like being straight (or attracted to only one gender rather) but the concept of leaving someone over that is just painful to me

[Discordian 6,013]

The response is really shocking honestly

I don't know what it's like being straight (or attracted to only one gender rather) but the concept of leaving someone over that is just painful to me

Likewise, the idea of dating a man is uncomfortable and generally not something I would ever even consider as a remote possibility. I wouldn't even think about if it weren't for the fact that LGBT people are numerous and vocal about topics like this.

 

With that increasing number of people there will inevitably be those who run into this sort of situation so in a way it's good we think about it beforehand so we're ready(ish) to handle such a situation.

 

What annoys me is that people like myself are not allowed to just say "no because I don't like dudes" without being grilled like there's some big psychological reasoning behind it or as if there's some moral dilemma going on. For me, it really is as simple as all that.

 

No dudes. No thanks.

[Codelyy 1,281]

I think I would be okay with it if my boyfriend changed sex as long as me and him had discussed it beforehand and it wasn't just a sudden decision I knew nothing about.

 

Truthfully I think it would really depend on how much I love them since if I loved them tons beforehand then I would likely be okay with it as they are still the same person I fell in love with but if it was a sudden change within like a week of us going out then I imagine seeing myself wanting to break up and stay friends.

[Sir Hugsalot 8,621]

The response is really shocking honestly

I don't know what it's like being straight (or attracted to only one gender rather) but the concept of leaving someone over that is just painful to me

Sorry, but love is about more than just satisfying other person, in fact rolling that way is an easy way to become unhappy person. 

 

Straight people are not attracted to same gender. Some are capable of developing feelings for transgender people, some are not. I, as I said am not and as much as I know way too well about how painful rejection can be I won't lock myself in a cage in order to satisfy someone. I won't be in relationship with person I don't love as only thing that comes out of such decision in the end is breaking someone's heart as well as my own. And people might consider me shallow, but in a relationship I would not be able to look past the fact the person was a male in the past. 

 

And yes, leaving someone over that *is* painful. For both. If You think saying "no" or breaking up with someone is an easy thing to do then You clearly never had to reject someone You care about. Or really lack empathy. 

 

Sorry for being blunt.

[K1539 47]

Some people have reported having changes in thoughts and behavior from hormone therapy. So there is a possibility of them changing as a person. However, I would still love the person I am with. But you don't have to be in a relationship with someone just because you love them; the definition of love isn't attraction. Or there would be a lot of incest going on. Like more than we already have. Alternately, nobody would love their family members or their friends.

That aside, it would depend on if that person retained the qualities I fell in love with, or if I fell in love with that person's new ones. The question appears to focus on the body of the person, and if I would stay if the body was changed. And the answer is yes, because it is the effort of the relationship and the memories and the moments which I value most.
Some people value sexuality. I just happen to not. Some people value physical qualities. I just happen to not. So I'm not here to say it's wrong to leave someone if they change their sex.

[honk friend 1,972]

Likewise, the idea of dating a man is uncomfortable and generally not something I would ever even consider as a remote possibility. I wouldn't even think about if it weren't for the fact that LGBT people are numerous and vocal about topics like this.

 

With that increasing number of people there will inevitably be those who run into this sort of situation so in a way it's good we think about it beforehand so we're ready(ish) to handle such a situation.

 

What annoys me is that people like myself are not allowed to just say "no because I don't like dudes" without being grilled like there's some big psychological reasoning behind it or as if there's some moral dilemma going on. For me, it really is as simple as all that.

 

No dudes. No thanks.

I think you missed the part where I said I don't understand your perspective

I never said you're wrong for having a preference, if you read my post in the other trans thread you'd know that

I think it's shallow but I've never been attracted to only one thing in my life so the simple fact is I'm never gonna get it.

 

Sorry, but love is about more than just satisfying other person, in fact rolling that way is an easy way to become unhappy person. 

...

And yes, leaving someone over that *is* painful. For both. If You think saying "no" or breaking up with someone is an easy thing to do then You clearly never had to reject someone You care about. Or really lack empathy. 

I didn't mean painful as in emotionally painful, I meant painful as in cringe-worthy as a concept. I wouldn't understand the emotional pain because I don't break off relationships for reasons like that and I don't get involved with anyone who does. 

 

The point of my post wasn't to spark debate, but if you wanna go there, the idea of a relationship being one-sided because your partner's uncomfortable with their gender is INCREDIBLY shallow. If your partner's giving you their all, it might not be enough if you're not right for each other, but it sure as hell isn't "one-sided" and to even suggest that is shallow as fuck.

[Sir Hugsalot 8,621]

 

 

I didn't mean painful as in emotionally painful, I meant painful as in cringe-worthy as a concept. I wouldn't understand the emotional pain because I don't break off relationships for reasons like that and I don't get involved with anyone who does. 

 

The point of my post wasn't to spark debate, but if you wanna go there, the idea of a relationship being one-sided because your partner's uncomfortable with their gender is INCREDIBLY shallow. If your partner's giving you their all, it might not be enough if you're not right for each other, but it sure as hell isn't "one-sided" and to even suggest that is shallow as fuck.

Why is it cringeworthy? Because we choose to seek our own happiness instead of ending up in a life-lasting relationship we're not happy with? Love is beyond person's control. I really wish I would not stop loving the person after gender change, but my sexual preferences make it clear that who I am with *must* be a female. Not MTF, not FTM, but female. Besides you said it Yourself - You don't know how is it being straight. Then why are you judging straights? Because despite how You justify it - this is what it is - judging. And it's the sole reason why I lashed out. I don't judge people and I don't want to be judged like that neither. Especially when in fact I do know transgenders and I do respect them. 

 

If this is how You perceived part of my post You decided not to quote then You clearly weren't reading carefully enough as this is not what I meant, sorry. I actuallly meant relationship is made between TWO PEOPLE. And both of them, not just one must be happy. If straight person isn't happy with the fact partner is changing gender then the only reasonable thing to do is parting ways. Otherwise at one point it's very likely to result in serious personal issues. Ever thought about that? 

[Sphinx-Ara 3,517]

As long as it doesn't change who they are on the inside, I don't see why I wouldn't still love them. I'm transgender myself, and I'd give them the same love and support that they'd be giving me. Personality trumps looks in my opinion

[Discordian 6,013]

@,

 

I completely understand that you don't see it because you don't live it. You can't expect to make a post without someone replying to it though regardless of the intention.

 

There are other factors at play. Changing one's gender changes a great deal of things, not just the sexual side. For one thing, and correct me if I'm wrong, but changing gender often removes the possibility of having children naturally.

[Zachary 5,517]

Nope, If they were to changed Gender, I wouldn't be able to Love and Date of those who change Gender.

[Discordian 6,013]

It should also be noted that this is obviously all hypothetical and most of us will never even run into this situation.

[honk friend 1,972]

Why is it cringeworthy? Because we choose to seek our own happiness instead of ending up in a life-lasting relationship we're not happy with? Love is beyond person's control. I really wish I would not stop loving the person after gender change, but my sexual preferences make it clear that who I am with *must* be a female. Not MTF, not FTM, but female. Besides you said it Yourself - You don't know how is it being straight. Then why are you judging straights? Because despite how You justify it - this is what it is - judging. And it's the sole reason why I lashed out. I don't judge people and I don't want to be judged like that neither. Especially when in fact I do know transgenders and I do respect them. 

 

If this is how You perceived part of my post You decided not to quote then You clearly weren't reading carefully enough as this is not what I meant, sorry. I actuallly meant relationship is made between TWO PEOPLE. And both of them, not just one must be happy. If straight person isn't happy with the fact partner is changing gender then the only reasonable thing to do is parting ways. Otherwise at one point it's very likely to result in serious personal issues. Ever thought about that? 

Idk how the point of a post can fly so far over your head but I SPECIFICALLY said it's fine to end a relationship you're not happy with if you looked at the end of my post

I said I didn't understand from your perspective specifically so I could make the point that I'm not judging you

 

I completely understand that you don't see it because you don't live it. You can't expect to make a post without someone replying to it though regardless of the intention.

Not entirely true considering how often the posts I put a lot of thought in to get ignored here

But at least you didn't miss the point

Edited October 20, 2016 by Kiti

[Member Berry 1,217]

I'd still love him (well, her) but I don't think we could survive as a couple. I'm not gay/bi and I couldn't pretend to be.

[Ricebug 555]

I'm a very open minded person. So, yes I would. Obviously I have a sexual preference, but I feel as though I would never be able to go through the action of intercourse. It's too...close and personal for my tastes...

[MLPFanatic34 3,234]

I would still love them if they did, I'm not one to judge someone based on their appearance etc.