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Sorry, forgive, thank you.


碇 シンジン

Sorry, forgive, thank you.  

48 users have voted

  1. 1. Do you say sorry if you feel you have hurt someone?

    • Yes.
      35
    • Often
      10
    • Rarely
      3
    • No
      0
  2. 2. Do you feel better if the person that hurt you says sorry?

    • Yes.
      7
    • If they mean it.
      38
    • No
      3
  3. 3. Do you forgive people easily?

    • Yes.
      22
    • Some things cannot be forgiven.
      21
    • No
      5
  4. 4. Do you say thank you if you've been helped or praised by someone else?

    • Yes
      32
    • Often
      14
    • Rarely
      2
    • No
      0
  5. 5. Do you feel better when you've helped someone and they say thank you to you?

    • Yes
      25
    • If they mean it.
      22
    • No
      1


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Can one word make you feel better? If it does why is that? 

 

 

 

I want to say sorry to people every time I feel that I did something wrong or something that made other people to work unnecessarily. It makes me feel better after I've said that.

 

I want to forgive all things that happened to me but some of them are harder than others, because I don't want to hold a grudge. It just makes me feel angry if I do.

 

I don't usually say thank you because I feel it kind of awkward maybe because I think that I should've handled this myself not needing others help me. But I truly appreciate if someone helps me I just feel I don't deserve it.

 

 

 

Ok it lagged and made 2 threads sorry about that. I hope you can forgive thank you.

Edited by ooBrony
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I'm quoting this question in your poll because this has come up a bit in my life.

 

Do you say thank you if you've been helped or praised by someone else?

 

 

I can get very uncomfortable being praised. Depending on the intensity of the thank you or praise ... I almost get that sensation that I want the ground to open and swallow me up. I don't know why. Maybe I just don't know how to appropriately respond. Maybe it's because I try and live as a decent guy with no motivation or agenda outside of being kind. If I am being thanked, I simple say, "Don't mention it, I try, or danka."

 

I have been know to tell people to stop when they are making a big deal about it though, which I understand may come off as rude or insensitive. I have a few eccentricities and that is one of them.

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First off, interesting topic.

 

I find myself saying sorry less and less recently. I don't know why. Maybe just a change in my attitude or personality. I do say sorry if I truly did hurt someone or did something majorly wrong, but if it's something minor I just don't see the point.

 

If someone tells me sorry for something they did, I really only appreciate it if they mean it. I've had too many people in my life say "sorry" for something and then continue to behave the same way. There is no point in saying sorry if you don't mean it and keep doing the things you're supposedly sorry for. Changing your ways and making sure not to repeat your mistakes with honest effort gets my appreciation, not a shallow misuse of the word sorry.

 

This one goes hand-in-hand with the previous one, but I do believe some things cannot be forgiven. There are a few folks in my life that I just feel are scum and aren't getting my respect. They've either hurt me, my friends, or my family too many times to count and I will never respect them for it and they will never be forgiven.

 

It'd just be rude not to say thank you if someone really helps you out. Especially if it's someone who is always there for me. I have a few family members, like my grandfather, who are always there to help me, and I tell them thank you every time and I sincerely mean it.

 

For the final question, hearing someone thank me for my help makes me feel like I accomplished something so I very much appreciate it. Getting praise helps me boost myself up a bit and helps me know if I'm doing the right thing or not, plus it reinforces my beliefs.

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Well, when I feel I did something wrong, then , yes, saying "sorry" will help me feel better. However, if someone did something really bad to me, I think that saying "sorry" to me will not make me feel better and this is because a word is most likely not going to change the situation.

 

About forgiveness, even if I did forgive them in my heart, they probably would not know anyway.

I say "thank you" a lot to people who help me and I expect them to do the same when I help them. It is just common sense.

 

Something called 'being polite', you know ?

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I'll say sorry and thank you whenever necessary. I think my tone is what ultimately tells them if I'm really sorry or thankful.

 

I can only forgive if it's not a big deal, or if they are clearly regretting their actions towards me.

Edited by SparkWolf
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A lot of the issue is whether I believe they mean it.  They could mean it as much as possible and if I don't believe it, I forgive more slowly.

 

Furthermore, I fear I forget to say thank you or sorry occasionally.

 

Finally, society needs things to smooth over the bumps.  These are part of that.

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  • 4 months later...

Do you say sorry if you feel you have hurt someone?

Yep, sometimes even when I haven't really hurt someone at all. I just don't like upsetting others even a little

Do you feel better if the person that hurt you says sorry?

If they mean it, then yeah. Otherwise I'll feel they're just exploiting my good nature, or that they're being stubborn and not learning from anything they're doing.

Do you forgive people easily?

Yep. I don't see any point in holding a grudge; people aren't perfect, I can't act like they should be. 'Forgive, but don't forget'- that's me :)

Do you say thank you if you've been helped or praised by someone else?

Yes, but often I'll say 'thanks, but-' I don't really like getting praise, I don't know what to do with it and I don't really think I deserve it anyhow. It doesn't help that I often get praised for stupid things that require little thought or effort =/

Do you feel better when you've helped someone and they say thank you to you?

If they mean it, then yeah. Otherwise, I'll feel like I've been used :(

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1) Yes, I hate the idea of causing pain to someone who doesn't deserve it

 

2) Only if they mean it and i can tell if someone is really sorry for what they did

 

3) umm.... Hell no it is not wise to cross me, I hold grudges for a long time.... well it depending on what you did I will be lenient or harsh about it

 

4) Yes I'am very polite when people assist or praise me.... but not all the time I thank them sometimes I smile and nod

 

5) Yes I like it when people appreciate me for assisting them or praising them

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1) Yes definitely. I would never wish tor hurt anyone especially their feelings. 

2) If they mean it then I would feel much better. That means they genuinely feel bad for what they did and wish forgiveness. Then we can get back to being happy and not all sad. :)

3) Yes I do. I do not like grudges, for grudges just brew hatred, and hatred is something this world needs less of. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong. It would also be very easy for me to forgive if the person genuinely wishes forgiveness.

4) I usually do though depending on the amount of praise I may fee a bit embarrassed.

5) Yes it does. Makes me feel like I did a good thing. 

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I say "sorry" on a fairly regular basis.  To those I care about.  Even though they may tell me an apology wasn't necessary.

 

I try not to dispense empty apologies, and I don't want empty apologies.  If someone tells me they're sorry, it only makes me feel better if I believe that they mean it.

 

Again, I find it relatively easy to forgive those I care about.  This doesn't necessarily mean I will hold a grudge till the end of time if I'm wronged by someone I don't care about. xD  I may well forget rather than forgive; I don't dispense false forgiveness, either.

 

I say "thank you" if I've been helped.  If I'm praised, I might say thanks.  Or I will be dismissive of it.  Worse yet, I may dance all around it like an awkward, shy little boy who's suddenly found his feet very interesting.  I'm not really sure how I will / should act.

 

I appreciate an earnest "thank you."  Though, and here's more self-perplexing behavioral nonsense for you, I will oftentimes downplay whatever it is I did to elicit that thank you.  "No problem.  No big deal.  Don't worry about it.  I didn't do much of anything, really."  I've not saved anyone from certain doom.  I've likely just made someone a sandwich. x3

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"If they mean it" is the key word in two of those questions. If they don't mean it, it can sometimes be hard to tell, particularly online. It's likely to become clear soon enough whether they did or not, though, and if they didn't, it just leaves you set up for another fall.

 

Probably why I don't forgive easily. Or much.

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Hurting someone is probably one of the worst feelings I ever get. I don't know why or what the response is that makes it so dramatic for me but whether I hurt someone that's a stranger or not it just hurts me a lot too. So yeah, when I say sorry, I always mean it a lot. In fact I usually express more than saying sorry and go in depth on exactly how sorry I am and why.

 

I do, though it depends on the level they hurt me. I'm not one to hold grudges but if someone does something really bad to me it often takes a lot more than just "sorry" but people rarely get on my nerves that easily. I'm not easy to push nowadays.

 

Most of the time. It's not my nature to hold grudges on people.

 

I'd honestly think it'd be rude of me if I didn't actually. I always say thank you.

 

I do. When someone says thank you to me it tells me that they've accepted and appreciated the help I gave them which is good because then I know I was worth their time. I feel good when I've made someone feel better.

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I don't like saying thank you. I feel like thankfulness should be expressed by my actions and emotions, and not by saying a simple "thank you".

 

Like, really. How many times I've received an awesome present and proceeded to look all happy and omigosh all over the place when suddenly everyone gets upset because I didn't say a mere "thank you"? *sigh* Really, sometimes I think people need to hear the words rather than seeing it for themselves. :/

 

 

On the same note, when I do something I'm really sorry for, I don't stop saying sorry until the person gets that I really mean it. I know I might have hurt the person, but I can't help but try to help them. And that makes me feel so bad inside... 

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I apologize when I do something wrong and I appreciate it when others do the same. When it comes to forgiveness...well, I'll usually forgive people if they hurt me in some way, but there are things that I would never forgive.

 

Being praised is something I like, even if it does make me a bit uncomfortable. I will thank people for it, though.

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1) Yes. Due to my normally nice personality, I cannot go without saying sorry if I hurt someone.

 

2) If they mean it. I'll accept an apology if there is sincerity but I do kinda have a sense where I can tell when I'm bullshited.

 

3) Somethings cannot be forgiven. I cannot forgive serious things, not easily. It takes some time depending on how serious it is.

 

4) Yes. Though I'll be a bit shy about it because I help without reward. I'm just happy to help.

 

5) If they mean it. I hate to sound clinical but some people will be jerks and I have to be sure they are sincere before accepting the thanks.

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