Lines you'll never catch FIM characters saying.

[Singe 2,109]

Rarity: He is so handsome. *Lays on her bed.* Oh, the many things we could do with each other. I just can't contain myself, I know I'll name them. *Looks at Spike.* Spike, go somewhere else. You're too young to hear this.

Spike: *Sigh and leaves the room.*

 

Twilight Sparkle: You spied on Rarity with another stallion, what were they doing?

Pinkie Pie: I'll try to explain it as best as I can with this recording. 

[Ganondorf8 11,118]

Princess Celestia: Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi! You're my only hope.

 

Princess Luna: Wrong series... again.

[Singe 2,109]

Teacher: Rainbow Dash, that's the girl's locker room. You need to go to the boys locker room.

Rainbow Dash: That's because my dad has this obsession to make me dress and act like boy. I can prove I'm a girl.

Boys: *Stare at Rainbow Dash.*

Rainbow Dash: Not, here.

 

Sweetie Belle: Look what I borrowed, it's Rarity's stallion exclusive magazine.

Applebloom: I'm going to dream about that hunk right there.

Scootaloo: Yeah, yeah. Just get to the full page spread already.

 

Applejack: Big Mac, could you pick up that box and move it over there?

Big Mac: Yep. *Bites on it. Sniff. * Yuck! *Spit spit.* Applejack, the damn dog is marking again! You said you broke her of that habit.

Applejack: Sorry, Bic Mac. I''l deal with her later and a little dog lemonade isn't going to hurt you.

Big Mac: I am not putting my mouth near that until you wash it.

Applejack: Fine. Applebloom!

Big Mac: No. You're not making her clean up your mistake.

Applebloom: What is it Applejack?

Applejack: Uh...nothing dear.

Edited March 19, 2017 by Singe

[cmarston1 5,952]

Twilight Sparkle: Just because I am the princess of friendship doesn't mean that I am able to be friends with everypony.  Sometimes you just have to cut your loses, because there are those that you can never be friends with.

Edited March 19, 2017 by cmarston1

[Twilight-Shimmer 151]

Princess Twilight: "Flash Sentry!"

Flash Sentry: *enters Twilight's throne room* "Yes Princess?"

Princess Twilight: "I am bored, and In heat and need some relief, so I want you to get the Princess Celestia wig and meet me in my chambers in five minutes"

Flash Sentry: *Sighs "Yes mam*

[aoEAF2FBvC0MIo2Q 3,671]

"You've met with a terrible fate, haven't you?"

 

Seriously, the moment that line gets uttered, it'll go front page on Equestria Daily!

[Singe 2,109]

Pinkie Pie: Hi, I heard you're having a baby. Can't wait to see it?

Pony: Uh.....em.....*Slams door. *

Pinkie Pie: Calling HQ. Sorry Rarity, we're going to abort the mission. This is the fifth time she has refused.

[Singe 2,109]

Party Canon: Boom!

Rarity: OW! My face. Keep that thing away from me.

Pinkie Pie: Rarity, I am so sorry. My canon never fired off on its own. It must like you a lot.

Rarity: It broke my nose and ruined my clothes, you're making a dang joke about it!

Pinkie Pie: Sorry.

 

Luna: Under the new rules, your Party Canon now falls under the prohibition of bringing weapons on school grounds.

Pinkie Pie: What? That's crazy, it's not a weapon.

Luna: I have several complaints about your party canon injuring students and staff.

Pinkie Pie: Come on it's just a few bumps, as the coach would say, "Walk it off."

Luna: Yes, well that coach was fired and arrested for inappropriate conduct in the locker rooms.

[maemaee 33]

"Buy all of our merchandise!"

[Singe 2,109]

Rarity catches Spike ate all her gems.

Rarity: *Snaps* Ohhhhhhh-hohohohohoho~! Spiiiiiiiike, come heeeeeeere~! [Hits Spike repeatedly] Spit it out right there or I'll gag you with a toothbrush and get the chunks left over from every gem you've stolen from me in the past  48 hours! [Spike "Gulp! Gulp! Gulp!" and Rarity hits him one last time] Try again!

 

Sunset Shimmer: So we're in agreement, no boys associated with this group. Last thing we need is us falling for the same guy, throwing ourselves at his feet, and turning into a stereotypical anime harem fighting for his affection.

Flash Sentry: *Sheds a tear and walks away while Octavia plays a sad note.*

 

Applejack: I can't wait for supper. What is it Pinkie?

Pinkie Pie: It's rocks.

Applejack: *Bleep* this, we're out of here.

Pinkie Pie: Applejack?

Applejack: There is a limit to how far I can rollback but the Stone Age is too far.

Edited March 30, 2017 by Singe

[Singe 2,109]

Twilight Sparkle: I won, Trixie.

Trixie Moon: That was just fake magic.

Twilight Sparkle: Well, I still out performed you.

Trixie Moon: Like hell you did. You're just claiming a win based solely on semantics. If you really want to play this game. *Horn lights up.*

Twilight Sparkle: Trixie, what are you doing?

Trixie Moon: Run. *Starts firing magic bolts at Twilight causing her to run.*

 

[Singe 2,109]

Rarity: I invited him into my home....and he left me in the morning.

 

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon: Scandalous.

 

Diamond Tiara: My mom has been seeing another colt behind my father's back.

Apple Bloom: And this our problem, how?

Diamond Tiara: I want you to fix it.

 

 

 

[Tropical Melody 5,104]

Fluttershy: Who's for BBQ? I made sausages!

Princess Celestia: Oh crap now what ...

 

[blackstarraven 142]

FlutterShy: "I'm getting tired of these Mother Bucking snakes!, on this mother bucking train!"  (I really want a snakes on a plane pony parody)

[blackstarraven 142]

2 hours ago, Singe said:

Rarity: I invited him into my home....and he left me in the morning.

 

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon: Scandalous.

 

Diamond Tiara: My mom has been seeing another colt behind my father's back.

Apple Bloom: And this our problem, how?

Diamond Tiara: I want you to fix it.

 

This.... This is better then and should go with my Snakes on a Train Ideal.

 

 

[Luigi 7,868]

Filthy Rich: You're GOING to that summit, Diamond Tiara! This isn't even up for debate!

 

Twilight Sparkle: Worst Renaissance Fair EVER!!!!!

Rainbow Dash: Please let it go, Twilight!

Twilight: It was writhe with historical inaccuracies. For example, the tavern mare serving flagons of mead, her costume was obviously Germanic, but eighthundred years ago, Princess Celestia's passing of the Equestrian Purity Laws, of Reinheitzkabot, SEVERELY limited the availability of mead!

Rainbow: You're NITPICKING!

[Singe 2,109]

Twilight Sparkle: Can you guess who I'm dressed up as?
Rainbow Dash: You're dressed up like that bearded homeless colt that keeps spouting "It's the end of the world!"

Twilight Sparkle: Can you guess who I'm dressed up as?
Pinkie Pie: You're dressed up like that bearded criminal colt that was arrested for kidnapping fillies.

Twilight Sparkle: Can you guess who I'm dressed up as?
Applejack: You're dressed up like that bearded insane colt that went down in a magic fight with the police.

Twilight Sparkle: Can you guess who I'm dressed up as?
Rarity: You're dressed up like that bearded colt dictator that got overthrown by rebels and he didn't live past that.

Twilight Sparkle: Can you guess who I'm dressed up as?
Fluttershy: You're dressed up like my bearded grandfather.....*Cries and runs away.*

Twilight Sparkle: Can you guess who I'm dressed up as?
Princess Luna: You're dressed up like Starswirl the Bearded.

Twilight Sparkle: Finally.

 

Twilight Sparkle: See Starlight Glimmer still has cutie mark.

Random Male: Ah! I should have noticed something was off about her. She didn't feel down about it like the rest of us and acted like a total alpha dog.

Applejack: Okay, just because she tricked you into a cult doesn't mean you can bad mouth dogs.

 

Spike: Ha. You Cutie Mark Crusaders can't get in. Twilight erected a barrier to keep you out, because she needs her safe space.

Applebloom: That's not going to fly well with.

Spike: What do you mean?

Sweetie Belle: Just wanted to tell her that Princess Celestia was just here and she's really mad.

Spike: What? Why?

Scootaloo: Something about being a bad role model. I didn't mentor some intolerant fool, she said.

Applebloom: Princess Celestia wasn't mad at us for the articles, we're just kids. Nobody taught us about keeping secrets and gossip.

Sweetie Belle: That responsibility falls with on our betters for inadequate teaching.

Spike: Okay. Okay. Stop. Twilight is getting very antsy. Look we'll talk with the townsfolk.

Scootaloo: We'll talk with Princess Celestia and say the whole thing never happen.

 

Starlight Glimmer: Thanks for letting me stay.

Twilight Sparkle: No problem as my student....

*Crowbar falls out of Starlight Glimmer's bag.*

Twilight Sparkle: Why do you have a crowbar?

Starlight Glimmer: Oh, this thing. It was something I used for those stubborn non-compliant doors and windows that just refuse to work with ya. Sometimes you got to jab it in there or give it a couple of smacks. I don't need it anymore. *Sweat.*

Spike: Why is parts of it red?

Starlight Glimmer: Some of the buildings used to be red before painted to white. *Sweat.*

Twilight Sparkle: Well okay, Applejack might have a use for it.

 

Twilight Sparkle: Bit of a warning, I'm a sleep hugger. When I was younger I would find my way into my brother's bed and clamp on him tight. Mom, got tired of it at one point saying such behavior was inappropriate.

 

Edited April 2, 2017 by Singe

[Luigi 7,868]

Rainbow Dash: Hey, Applejack! Look what I made!

Applejack: It's a stone, Rainbow. You didn't make it.

Rainbow: It's a football! I chiseled it!

 

Filthy Rich: I'VE WARNED YOU ONCE BEFORE, RAINBOW DASH! THATS MY LUMBER! YOURE IN MY BOUNDS!!

Rainbow Dash: My land's always run up to the forest and I haven't sold any, Rich!

Filthy Rich: It is clear in my grandfather's will. My la......

Applejack: Your grandfather damn near willed away our north pasture, but he knew Granny Smith would break his left front leg if he tried to mess with Sweet Apple Acres.

[Singe 2,109]

Sci-Twilight Sparkle: I just couldn't make any friends.

Applejack: Six billion plus people in the world and you're telling me you couldn't make a friend. I call bull on that.

Rarity: Darling making a friend is easy. *Points to random male student.* You!

Male Student: Me?

Rarity: Yes, you. Closet now.

Male Student: Yes, ma'am. *Runs into the closet and shuts the door.

Rarity: Okay, Twilight. Now go in that closet and make yourself a friend.

Sci-Twilight Sparkle: Are you serious?

Rarity: Making a friend is like investing. You gotta give a little to make it big on the return. Now get in there.

[Hierok 11,829]

On 5-7-2015 at 11:09 AM, cider float said:

Rainbow Dash: I'm a lesbian and I'm gay for Applejack

If only, if only...

[cmarston1 5,952]

Twilight Sparkle: Now that I am a princess, I'm gonna legalize everything.

[Singe 2,109]

Applejack: Sunset Shimmer, can't you find a way to fix our transformations? I don't want to keep running to a closed area every-time to transform.

Rarity: Surely, I hope so. Ever since that first time we transformed in front of our peers. That one guy who said, "You girls we're naked for a few seconds."

Rainbow Dash: It changed everything around us. Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie, took it the hardest.

Fluttershy: They saw everything. I feel so awkward around everyone that stares at me.

Pinkie Pie: And we live in an age where people record things with their phones.

Sunset Shimmer: I'm working to fix this. Though I don't see what the big deal is, I walked around naked back in my world.

Rarity: Clearly, she doesn't understand the concept in our world.

 

Nightmare Moon: Welcome to Nightmare Tales children. Today I will tell you the tale of Pinkie Pie who gets cursed putting her stomach before her friends. I call this tale, "You can't have your friends and eat them too."

Nightmare Moon: Wasn't that scary, watching Pinkie Pie turn each of her friends into sweets with an accursed touch. There is nothing to worry, she'll make new friends with those ants. *Evil laugh.*

Edited April 9, 2017 by Singe

[Singe 2,109]

Twilight Sparkle: When I open my eyes, that better not be what I think it is slapping me in the face.

 

Rainbow Dash: Why does your copies of Daring Do have doodles in them?

Twilight Sparkle: Those aren't doodles, just corrections on grammar and spelling.

 

Spa Pony: You really love these mud facials.

Rarity: Yes, rub it all over my face.

 

*Angel splashing wildly as Fluttershy holds him down in the water.*

Fluttershy: You knew one day it would come to this.

Applejack: What are you doing?
Fluttershy: Teaching Angel to swim. Now hold your breath. *Whisper* Because it will be the last.

 

Sunset Shimmer: I don't get this movie. He's just big and wearing a hockey mask. Looks rather silly...*Slash scare scene*...OH MY GOD!

 

 

[Singe 2,109]

Applejack: *Looks at bowl of rock soup.*

Igneous Rock Pie: What's wrong lass? You haven't touch my rocks let alone nibble on them one bit.

Applejack: Uh.....

Igneous Rock Pie: I get it. My rocks needs more salt.

Applejack: Uhhhh......

Igneous Rock Pie: What's the problem? My wife eats my rocks. My girls eats my rocks. Your granny is trying. *Slams hoof on table.* My rocks not good enough for you, lass.

Applejack: Okay, this is getting too weird. *Leaves table.*

 

[Backup singer]

My Little Pony, My Little Pony

Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahhh...

[Twilight Sparkle]

(My Little Pony)

Celestia forced me to wonder what friendship could be

(My Little Pony)

I still find it ridiculous that you have to share this magic with me

[Rainbow Dash]

Lame adventure

[Pinkie Pie]

Tons of blood

[Rarity]

A beautiful flank

[Applejack]

Unfaithful and wrong

[Fluttershy]

Faking kindness!

[Twilight Sparkle]

It's a menial task

And magic makes it all too easy

You have my little ponies

Do you know you're all my very bitter friends?

 

Edited April 14, 2017 by Singe

[Canteen_the_unstable 7,963]

Any of them

 

Is it me or is your plot getting thicker?