Post A Quote From Your Day, Without Any Context.

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"Who'd have thought, I'd need so many tools just to change a light bulb ... this is like nano-rocket-surgery ... this is why mechanics charge by the hour ... the customer is asking, 'It's just a headlight, what's taking so long' ... the manager's been back twice to see how I'm doing here ... if there's a third time, I'm going to threaten them with great bodily harm ..."

 

[ExplosionMare 18,063]

Don't try to baseball golf

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"It's on top of the blue box!"

*Sotto voce aside* "They're all blue!" *snigger*

 

[Denim&Venöm 19,055]

"Holy st! This is not my desk!" 

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"Karen won't let me use any more muffin trays."

 

[Totally Nyx 36,058]

Where's the lamb sauce!!

[ExplosionMare 18,063]

I was gonna go ahead and jump.

Please jump.

[Denim&Venöm 19,055]

 "Dammit Pantera! This beer is warm! Get me another one!" 

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"And I'm like, wow! How great would it be to be able to wear a dress and not be judged! And still be a dude!"

 

[Ruddboy Olaf 10,628]

Sorry nothing.

Edited July 23, 2024 by Ruddboy Olaf

[Denim&Venöm 19,055]

"Is Ohio real in the Harry Potter universe?" 

[Jackleberry 1,923]

"It's North Korea in here"

[Denim&Venöm 19,055]

"Japan.

Jesus.

Two things that sometimes combine." 

[Denim&Venöm 19,055]

"I thought you said you don't hold a grudge."

"I don't. I have no surviving enemies." 

[DubWolf 17,264]

"But can you drive a bus?"

"I can fly an airplane."

"....."

Proudest roast  .

[Denim&Venöm 19,055]

"This is beyond deep throating. I'd say it's shallow chesting." 

[Totally Nyx 36,058]

♫ Burn the land, boil the see. You can't unsubscribe from me. ♫

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"If anyone trith to hang me, I'll thcream and thcream and thcream 'til I'm thick. I can."

 

[ExplosionMare 18,063]

Golly gosh, living is difficult!

Not living is even harder, so it's a lose-lose situation

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"Do you want a new O-ring? Might at well, eh? Everyone else has had one. You don't want to feel left out do you? OK, what size are you? Have they got one your size?" *rummage* "He [it] looks to be one of them, only this one is a little bit chunkier-rer ..."

 

[Ragland Tiger 3,401]

Those who can take advice are superior to those who give it.

[Brony Number 42 10,069]

Reanimating a corpse never ends well.

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"He found some acid drops in a drawer adhering to a tube of yellow ochre. He extricated the drops and ate them, but the yellow ochre made him feel sick ..."

 

[Denim&Venöm 19,055]

"We're not all in the same boat, we're in the same storm; some people are in yachts, others are clinging to a scrap of wood."

[Tropical Melody 6,253]

"This is taking longer than I guesstimated – shoving my tool in – and I don't care what the consequences are!"