Three ponies are suspected of trashing your house. What do you do?

[KillerKingBakudan 702]

You just bought a new house in Ponyville. Twilight, Mayor Mare and Pinkie Pie have all agreed to give you a welcoming party for being the first human citizen in town. That kind of makes you a celebrity, so all ponies are welcome to attend for the opportunity of meeting you and becoming your new friends.

But days before the party, you've already engaged in lengthy conversations with several of your favorite ponies. At some point, the subject of your most hated pony in Equestria comes up. This could be anyone you don't like: Chancellor Neighsay, Svengallop, Zephyr Breeze, Flim or Flam, etc. You could talk almost endlessly about what a jackass this pony is. You talk about how much you'd like to kick his ass. You make jokes about him. And most of the ponies are having a blast just listening to you and nodding their heads at every insult. They don't like this pony very much either.

Then the topic shifts to ponies from OUR world. Fluttershy is curious to see what they're like in person. So on the next day, you decide to head back and talk to a friend who happens to know a farmer, who owns a handful of ponies (because reasons). And the farmer lends you the youngest one from his stables.



Wouldn't it be nice to bring this plump little baby for all Equestrians to see?

You do just that, and on the night of party, the pony guests are in love with it. It's a lot like a special kind of monkey to them.

When the party ends, all the guests leave except for Derpy. She's had too much to drink, and she hurt herself trying to keep up with all the dancing. Doc Whooves asks if you could let her sleep over for the night, and you agree to help her with this one favor... as long as she doesn't do anything stupid.

 

You get up in the morning to do some shopping. You check on the baby pony. It's still grazing in the backyard. You check on Derpy. She's still laying like a vegetable on the sofa. You then head out. You're gone for hours, and when you head back with all your new stuff, you find your most hated pony on the street. He's walking in your direction about 50 feet away from your house. He doesn't say anything until you pass him, at which point, you could hear him mumbling to himself. You're not able to make out a coherent sentence, but you're pretty sure that "asshole" was a word that came out of his mouth. Most likely referring to you. It seems he knows you've been talking so much shit about him behind his back.

And when you get back to the house, you find that the front door is wide open. You walk inside, and the place is a mess. There's trash everywhere, some furniture's broken, and.... there's shit all over the floor.

You want to ask Derpy what the fuck happened, but she's nowhere to be found. And the baby pony that you've been looking after has gotten inside while you were out, and is now sleeping in the kitchen next to some food scraps. Apparently, the door to the yard was carelessly left unlocked. Or was it?


One of three things could have happened:

1) Derpy did all this herself by just being Derpy, and got so scared that she shit herself and flew off to avoid taking responsibility.
2) The pony you hate broke into the place, trashed it, shit on your floor, scared Derpy away and made it look like the baby pony did it.
3) You really did neglect to make sure the door was secured, and the baby pony just came in and did what ponies always do.

If you blame the first two without evidence, you could end up eating a lawsuit. And the farmer won't appreciate an accusation about the baby's behavior either. What conclusion do you make, and what do you do?

Edited July 17, 2018 by KillerKingBakudan

[The Kaeya Simp 13,968]

58 minutes ago, KillerKingBakudan said:

You just bought a new house in Ponyville. Twilight, Mayor Mare and Pinkie Pie have all agreed to give you a welcoming party for being the first human citizen in town. That kind of makes you a celebrity, so all ponies are welcome to attend for the opportunity of meeting you and becoming your new friends.

But days before the party, you've already engaged in lengthy conversations with several of your favorite ponies. At some point, the subject of your most hated pony in Equestria comes up. This could be anyone you don't like: Chancellor Neighsay, Svengallop, Zephyr Breeze, Flim or Flam, etc. You could talk almost endlessly about what a jackass this pony is. You talk about how much you'd like to kick his ass. You make jokes about him. And most of the ponies are having a blast just listening to you and nodding their heads at every insult. They don't like this pony very much either.

Then the topic shifts to ponies from OUR world. Fluttershy is curious to see what they're like in person. So on the next day, you decide to head back and talk to a friend who happens to know a farmer, who owns a handful of ponies (because reasons). And the farmer lends you the youngest one from his stables.



Wouldn't it be nice to bring this plump little baby to your party for all Equestrians to see?

You do just that, and on the night of party, the pony guests are in love with it. It's a lot like a special kind of monkey to them.

When the party ends, all the guests leave except for Derpy. She's had too much to drink, and she hurt herself trying to keep up with all the dancing. Doc Whooves asks if you could let her sleep over for the night, and you agree to help her with this one favor... as long as she doesn't do anything stupid.

 

You get up in the morning to do some shopping. You check on the baby pony. It's still grazing in the backyard. You check on Derpy. She's still laying like a vegetable on the sofa. You then head out. You're gone for hours, and when you head back with all your new stuff, you find your most hated pony on the street. He's walking in your direction about 50 feet away from your house. He doesn't say anything until you pass him, at which point, you could hear him mumbling to himself. You're not able to make out a coherent sentence, but you're pretty sure that "asshole" was a word that came out of his mouth. Most likely referring to you. It seems he knows you've been talking so much shit about him behind his back.

And when you get back to the house, you find that the front door is wide open. You walk inside, and the place is a mess. There's trash everywhere, some furniture's broken, and.... there's shit all over the floor.

You want to ask Derpy what the fuck happened, but she's nowhere to be found. And the baby pony that you've been looking after has gotten inside while you were out, and is now sleeping in the kitchen next to some food scraps. Apparently, the door to the yard was carelessly left unlocked. Or was it?


One of three things could have happened:

1) Derpy did all this herself by just being Derpy, and got so scared that she shit herself and flew off to avoid taking responsibility.
2) The pony you hate broke into the place, trashed it, shit on your floor, scared Derpy away and made it look like the baby pony did it.
3) You really did neglect to make sure the door was secured, and the baby pony just came in and did what ponies always do.

If you blame the first two without evidence, you could end up eating a lawsuit. And the farmer won't appreciate an accusation about the baby's behavior either. What do you do?

I think that Derpy knocked over some of the stuff to get back to her house...
But she wouldn't have done it all herself...

Then the pony I hate broke in and made more of a mess...
Then they shat a fair amount over the ground and then let the pony in...

then the foal found where my food is and started eating and then shat once then went to sleep

[Lord Valtasar 12,685]

I'd employ the help of inspector twilight sparkle and pinkie pie to get to the bottom of this mess

[Props Valroa 26,050]

Send them to court and have them investigated.

[Quinch 1,119]

Hmmm. Can I take time to gather more evidence before deciding? Also, is it a condition of the situation that it is definitely one of these three options?

Edited July 17, 2018 by Quinch

[KillerKingBakudan 702]

1 hour ago, Quinch said:

Hmmm. Can I take time to gather more evidence before deciding? Also, is it a condition of the situation that it is definitely one of these three options?

Maybe things didn't happen exactly as described in each option, but one of these ponies is ultimately at fault. 

But yeah, take your time.

[Quinch 1,119]

....also is it wrong that I want this to be a RP thread now?

[KillerKingBakudan 702]

Just now, Quinch said:

....also is it wrong that I want this to be a RP thread now?

I'm assuming you mean roleplay? It kind of is.

[SparkleSan79 91]

Hmmm...

Derpy, being the clumsy one, may have knocked over the furniture, spilling all the food.  Then the pony I couldn't stand, unable to find the bathroom, made a disgusting mess of the carpet as a result of not getting there in time.  Finally, the baby pony must've pushed the door open by himself and had trotted in.  My theory of all this is that I wasn't back in the time allotted to prevent this disaster from happening in the first place.  I should blame myself.

[Durov 84]

Time to crack out the big guns on the Pony i dislike's house

[Quinch 1,119]

On 7/17/2018 at 1:12 PM, KillerKingBakudan said:

I'm assuming you mean roleplay? It kind of is.

And this is where it all went horribly wrong. -grins-

 

He dropped the bags on the floor. The smell should have been the first cue, as he approached his new house. It should have been, if not for the human mind's instinctive reaction to dismiss things that don't make sense - shouldn't make sense, in our narrow, constrained worldview, stretching reluctantly against evidence we finally can't deny. Like evidence of living in a small cottage in another dimension filled with colorful yet intelligent quadrupeds. Or evidence of leaving your house to buy food to replace the one from the party last night, and find your floor covered in feces.

"Derpy?" he called, tentatively. "Derpy?!", he repeated, louder, voice now mixed with confusion and anger. Not anger at her, not yet, there was no time enough yet to think about blame, just the shapeless, directionless aggravation of a world turned, if not upside down, then uncomfortably to the side and the nauseating churn in his stomach from the smell of sealed shit.

He checked the kitchen. The pony was there - not the gray one, the stupid one, passed out - yes, just sleeping, from what little food was left over from yesterday. The gate to the yard flapped open.

"DERRRPEEEEYY!!", he called again, his only response being a flock of annoyed birds erupting from a nearby tree. Apparently, she was nowhere to be found. But how the hell.... the horse, he could get. But it was an indoor animal and he distinctly remembered not drinking enough last night - or at all - to forget his furniture not being wrecked. So this left...

What?

He needed answers. Or witnesses. Or suspects. Or...

Neighsay.

He would do that, too, he wagered.

He stormed out of the house and tore down the street in the direction where he last saw the self-aggrandizing bureaucratic bully.

[EpicEnergy 22,089]

I'd blame my least favorite pony for trashing my house! 

[MysticWolficorn 76]

Hire detective Rarity to get to the bottom of this mess.

 

[Scootaloo9074090 500]

On 2018-07-18 at 10:41 PM, Quinch said:

And this is where it all went horribly wrong. -grins-

 

He dropped the bags on the floor. The smell should have been the first cue, as he approached his new house. It should have been, if not for the human mind's instinctive reaction to dismiss things that don't make sense - shouldn't make sense, in our narrow, constrained worldview, stretching reluctantly against evidence we finally can't deny. Like evidence of living in a small cottage in another dimension filled with colorful yet intelligent quadrupeds. Or evidence of leaving your house to buy food to replace the one from the party last night, and find your floor covered in feces.

"Derpy?" he called, tentatively. "Derpy?!", he repeated, louder, voice now mixed with confusion and anger. Not anger at her, not yet, there was no time enough yet to think about blame, just the shapeless, directionless aggravation of a world turned, if not upside down, then uncomfortably to the side and the nauseating churn in his stomach from the smell of sealed shit.

He checked the kitchen. The pony was there - not the gray one, the stupid one, passed out - yes, just sleeping, from what little food was left over from yesterday. The gate to the yard flapped open.

"DERRRPEEEEYY!!", he called again, his only response being a flock of annoyed birds erupting from a nearby tree. Apparently, she was nowhere to be found. But how the hell.... the horse, he could get. But it was an indoor animal and he distinctly remembered not drinking enough last night - or at all - to forget his furniture not being wrecked. So this left...

What?

He needed answers. Or witnesses. Or suspects. Or...

Neighsay.

He would do that, too, he wagered.

He stormed out of the house and tore down the street in the direction where he last saw the self-aggrandizing bureaucratic bully.

 Neighsay: drinking some Apple cider when he  a knock on his door. he open it hello is anypony there?

 

Scootaloo (Scootaloo9074090): you Trash my house Neighsay ( pick up Lightsaber and slice him in half )