Magpie

Dunno why I'm saying this here, I barely use this site anymore,, but I feel like I should get this off my chest somewhere. Might make it easier to say IRL, I guess. At least might let me get to sleep. I don't even know what I am now. For years I've identified as a bisexual man, then it was bisexual non-binary. But I have these feelings and thoughts that make me think otherwise. Since I was a kid I've wished I were a girl, but I didn't think too much of it then, I figured all boys did. Girls just have it better, but there's nothing to do about it. Then I got a bit older and I learned about trans people, but figured that I could never do that, the way I saw it was that I'm an unattractive and un-confident guy, but I could at least "pass" as a guy well enough rather than try to change things. Grow a beard, cut my hair short, wear boring clothes, no one will like me but at least they won't hate me. What all changed for me was meeting an openly trans woman a couple years back. Not the first I had met, but something about her was different. Seeing her transitioning older than I am now made me realize it's not too late. Seeing how beautiful she is, it makes me want to be like her. I haven't worked up the courage to say anything about these thoughts IRL yet though, this is actually the first time they're leaving my brain. I just worry about my partner, I've been in a relationship with a gay man for 4 years now and I worry how he'd react. The fear of general transphobia is there too of course, though I already wear a skirt and makeup in public, I feel like I can handle random strangers. My name I'm throwing around right now is Maggie, it's cute and the Magpie is one of my favorite animals. Maybe Margeret so I can be more formal and have Maggie or Mags as nicknames. I dunno. I think this needs some more thought before I do anything, but saying anything about it to anyone make me feel less insane.

Falling, no question. Drowning is terrifying and painful, it takes a while, and your body's going to fight against it the whole time. Falling, there's not a lot you can do about and there's no pain until you land which should hopefully kill you then and there.

Not so much anymore, when I was a bit younger people thought I was older. Being 6'7 with a deep voice does that, I guess.. Now I'm just a 20-something.

Hottest I go with food I make myself/want to enjoy is raw jalapeños. I can do peppers a little hotter and be alright, but at a certain point it kinda just ruins the food experience for me.

No, I'm overweight and have been for a while. Working on it though, down 30 pounds so far. Cutting out any sugar and carbs has been working for me, just another step in finally feeling comfortable in my body.

Personally it hasn't affected me much. Means I get to work from home which is a big plus, and otherwise I already didn't go out much. No one I know got it, and I just got vaccinated this weekend. So on a global scale it's obviously been devastating, but I'm lucky enough to have been mostly untouched by it.

Took a new picture for my FB, might as well post it here too. Letting my hair grow out again.

Nah, I hadn't gone in years before Covid, don't plan on it now. Maybe if someone else who I want to go with wants to see a movie, but not something I'd want to do otherwise.

I loved those books! It's a shame they're mostly only remembered for the covers. (Though the covers were pretty weird looking NGL).

Got back into it fairly recently actually, and when not being headshot across the map by bots I play Demoman and Medic. I'm probably best as Medic but play Demo when I don't want the pressure of being Medic because I'm not that great and don't want everyone relying on me all the time.

Most recently would be Chrono Trigger, never actually played it until this year. I loved SNES RPGs as a kid but never had that one.

One Great grandfather was in the U.S Navy in WW2. Another great-grandfather was in the Korean War, went nearly deaf from artillery fire.

It's no more meat than you or I, we've just decided that they're acceptable to eat. I do enjoy lamb myself but would gladly hug a sheep. I don't find a contradiction there, it's just how life is.

I have a beard, mostly because my chin isn't that well defined so I feel like a beard helps complete my face. And because shaving it gets annoying.

My great-grandmother...I think? She refuses to tell anyone how old she is so I'm not entirely sure, but that sounds about right considering my grandmother is in her 70's and isn't the oldest of her siblings.

All money is fake, but crypto is faker still and is also destroying the planet. We as a species would be far better off by abolishing the concept... That said I did make like 12k on DOGE the past few months, saw an easy opportunity and took it. Got out right before "DOGE day" as that was an obvious time for a dump.

I suppose Caffeine counts. I don't smoke and I only drink like once every couple weeks, and no hard drugs or anything. Would have said soda in the past, but cut out sugared sodas last year and mostly just drink caffinated water at this point.

I'm accustomed to 12 hour and so 24 hour takes me a second to do the conversion. That said, 24 hour removes ambiguity and is the superior system, so I do prefer it.

Nah, my fiancé and I sleep separately most of the time. We always have, just for comfort reasons. (I roll in my sleep a lot apparently, + he's accustomed to sleeping in a recliner and finds beds uncomfortable).

Right now at 24, honestly. Being a kid stunk, I hated the school environment. And as a late teen/early 20's I worked crappy jobs and didn't have a stable living situation. Now I have a decent job, my own place, and a stable partner. Just nice to be able to feel like my life is my own.

I consider myself fully open about it but what I'm open about is that I dunno. I'm ethnically Jewish but I'm not practicing myself, and I have no evidence that any god(s) exist but can't conclusively rule it out. I don't think it's something that can be conclusively proven, and that's fine with me.

Most time periods wouldn't exactly be kind to me as a Bi Jew, and considering all my marketable skills are computer based I think now is fine honestly. Guess if I had to pick another one the 80's weren't so bad.

Both but for different reasons. Showers to get clean, but I do enjoy a warm bath to soothe my muscles, I get frequent shoulder/neck pain that helps with. Wouldn't do it to get clean though, at least by itself.