What are your level/standards for friendship?

[lightning-spark 34]

I am an extremely friendly person and over the last year have made loads of friends but dont take this lightly as I only call about a handful of them close friends. I don't even call me ex gf a close friend. Also it is very hard for someone to make me dislike them as I give everyone a lot of chances but once you have made me dislike you it becomes hatred extremely easily.

[Celli 4,339]

I'd like them to be supportive of me, and just like me for who I am, and someone who is chill and likes to have a good time. I don't have any high standards for friendship

[Invincible 2,092]

I'd like friends who are open-minded, understanding, intelligent (at least somewhat...). Though i can get used to being friends with just about everyone, ones i consider my closer friends generally have this vibe about them, like i know i can get closer to them on a mental level. I can't really explain it, but it's that subtle gut feeling that tells me "This person is special. Keep an eye on them". 

[Justin_Case001 4,907]

I guess my standards are pretty high, though I've never really thought about definitions and that sort of thing.  I'm lucky to have a small circle of very close friends, though I don't live near any of them anymore.  :'(  For me to consider someone a close friend, it basically has to be someone with whom I can share anything, and I can count on them to be there for me no matter what.  And I would do the same for them.  Really, my close friends are the same as brothers to me.

 

In terms of making new friends, my requirements are very simple.  As long as a person is nice to me and respects me, then I'll be their friend.  A friendship may not endure if we have no common interests, but that's different.  Now, if a person loses my trust, it's almost impossible to get it back.  I'm a very tolerant and forgiving person, but I can't forgive intentional betrayal.  Lie to me, break a promise, disrespect me, and I will most likely walk away and never look back.  I won't tolerate that kind of drama.  Here's an example--if I had a friend, and told said friend I was a brony, and he/she reacted with intolerance, I would probably tilt my head slighty in sheer befuddlement and amusement, as if to say, "Huh, that's interesting."  Then I would silently turn, walk away, and never speak to said person again.  I know that people can change, and that person might come to regret his/her reaction, but if someone treats me that way, even once, that tells me enough about their character to know that I don't want to associate with him/her.  I'm extreme, I know, but I prefer to keep drama completely out of my life.  Basically, it's very easy to earn my friendship, but also easy to lose it.  All you have to do to earn my friendship is treat me, and by extension others, with kindness, tolerance, and respect.  All you have to do to lose my friendship is to not do any of those things, which means that it is, in fact, almost impossible to lose my friendship, as long as you are a good and kind person.  It's sort of like the innocent-until-proven-guilty system.  I'm your friend until you give me a reason not to be.  Luckily, I have never actually had to make that choice.  Not outside of childhood, anyway.  I have never had a friend in my adult life that was any less than trustworthy, loyal, kind, respectful, and true.  Perhaps my standards is part of the reason I don't have that many friends.  But that, I can live with.

 

Now, when I was in elementary school, I had a "friend" who was a most interesting character.  He gave his friends "chances" to be his friend.  Everyone began with three by default.  Do something nice for him, such as giving him the dessert out of your school lunch, and you earn another chance.  Do something wrong, such as, say, idk, maybe accidentally spilling a drink and some of it spashes on his shoes, and you lose a chance.  Lose all your chances, and you're out.  And you know what the truely pathetic thing was?  The kids bought into it.  For awhile there, my classmates were obsessed with trying to get on this little sh*t's good side.  They would literally compete to see who could win the most chances.  That sack of crap really had the class wrapped around his finger.  I was friends with him, initially, because he seemed nice and we shared interests.  The first time he said I had lost a chance to be his friend, I looked at him, titled my head slightly in mild befuddlement and amusement, silently turned, walked away, and never spoke to him again.

Edited July 3, 2014 by Justin_Case001

[Guest]

If you receive a handshake from me, then you're my friend. It's that simple. 

[Handsome Changeling 1,851]

If you understand basic communication whether that be talking or sign language or any other kinda communication then you can be my friend! Just talk a bit and once I grow comfortable around you you're in my book of friends heheh (I kinda do need a book of friends, hmmm)

[zombienixon 330]

I don't think my standards are very high.  If I like being around you and have common interests then I could call you a friend.  The only real deal breaker is if they're embarrassing to be around. If I get a bad first impression and it doesn't get any better from there, odds are I'm not going to be around you.

[Moonlight 7,288]

1. Stranger - obvious
2. Acquaintance - I know you but still not friends with you
3. Close Acquaintance - Debating on being friends with you
4. Friend - Obvious, I consider you a friend
5. Close Friend - I really like you
6. Best Friend - please don't ever leave

My standards are fairly high as it takes a while for me to open up to someone, I prefer being friends with people who like to joke around, not be serious every 5 seconds. However I also like people I can get serious with when needed and those who aren't huge dicks overall.

Edited February 4, 2015 by WheatleyCore

[KatonRyu 1,033]

I don't have set standards, really. I have tons of acquaintances I can talk to just fine, but not nearly as many actual friends. In general, people I talk to more are more likely to be considered my friends, but I have friends I haven't spoken to in years. They're still my friends, though, and whenever I do speak them it's just as fun as it was before.

 

Also my friends really should insult me on a regular basis. Anyone I call my best friend must make it a habit of being a condescending dick as much as humanly possible. At the same time these should be the people I can talk to about everything.

 

I have friends who fit that criteria, fortunately. I also have friends with whom I talk about a loft things, but the insults are left out. I don't know why, to be honest. Anyway, this is my jumbled mess of criteria for friends.

[kanashimi purinsesu 244]

I don't think I have levels for friendship lol. Though I don't have any friends irl (unless a brother and mother count) so I can't really say for sure. I'm a very needy pony I admit, though I won't come out and say it. I'm always complaining about something and my tastes aren't what most or even few like. *shrug*.

 

I will say though online I know three ponies that really accept me for who I am and actually make me feel rather good about myself. I try and help them out when they need it always and I always listen to what they say. I share in their excitement and anger. I've even bought them some gift cards before. Didn't want anything in return lol. I guess my friendship levels are just somepony that listens and doesnt mind listening to my often complaining. i don't have many issues  but one thing i really dont like is somepony who doesn't let me get a word in in any conversation. That and those that brush me off when i try to get into the things they are interested in so we can have something to share. *shrug* that's all I have to say lol

[\/ 651]

For me, I'd say anyone who can stand me and my constant pestering throughout a day is a good friend, especially when they don't judge me for my decisions. People who are pretty neutral tend to be fine with me, because as you might see on the forums, I have tons of viewpoints on things, so those kind of people don't argue with me that much. I've got a friend a bit on the judgy/argumental side who says I should be a lawyer.

[ARagY 1,152]

Online:

Not so serious

Willing to play every now and again

Talk about srs stuff other times

Be supportive/Good feedback

Not argumentative with different views (I'm friends with some hardcore Conservatives because they're ok with me being independent)

 

IRL:

Understand what "introvert" is and we'll be okay, ok?

[Clover Heart 978]

Someone I can be myself around, feel comfortable around and basically don't have to hide anything from. If I feel like I have to be "on" around someone or if I feel like I'm altering something about my personality, filtering my typical dialogue or in general just uncomfortable, I don't consider them a friend. That might be why I have so few friends...

[SCS 7,537]

I have pretty lax standards for someone I consider a friend or at least a friendly acquaintance at the lowest level. If someone's not a dick to me and I like them, I'll probably consider them at least a friendly acquaintance, and they're important to me even if I don't talk to them about my really personal shit.

 

When it comes to the standards I have for good, and moreover for best friends, they increase dramatically. I'm very careful about who I trust. I'll only trust someone on a deeper level if they have proven to me over time that they are loyal and trustworthy, that they genuinely care about me and have empathy for me. And of course I do all of the same for them, so if they're not someone I can get that close to and like that much then they probably wouldn't become a good friend.

[Scrubbed user 3,417]

For me, if you're willing to put up with me, and I don't have to explain myself all the time, we can be friends.

[Peppermint Larry 203]

There are people who I've only talked once or twice with. Those are my acquaintances.

 

There are people who I like to joke around with and whatnot, but don't really talk about deeper, more personal stuff with, nor do I really care about what's going on in their lives. They teeter the boundary of acquaintance and friend, and sometimes, some of them I consider to be frienemies.

 

There are people who I'd open up to. Those would be friends. But I have this thing, where I can only focus on one person at a time. So, having more than two or three friends is difficult for me. I have a boyfriend, so, naturally, he's the one I focus on, for the most part. Often times, this causes that previous friend to be kicked down a rung, and I hate that. They become 'old friends.'

 

The frienemies balance it all out, though, and I have many of those. Never a boring day at school with them. :3

 

Generally, I won't open up to people unless

• They have mutual warm feelings for me
• They can hold a calm, mellow and/or intelligent conversation
• There is genuine caring between us

[Hashi 323]

Somebody who I can trust, and who I like, and they like me (despite a couple of psychological issues WHICH I AM SORTING OUT!!! XD)

Also, I'm 99% sure this topic has been done before

[baltosaa 86]

I would require that person's loyalty in return for mine...

And for that person to just be a good friend in general, I S'pose...^.^

[catnet 9,359]

They'd have to be kind to others (though not necessarily myself). 

 

...that's about it, I think. 

[Midnight Solace 5,132]

I don't think I'd have much standards for friendship. The most I could ask for is to have someone that could understand me, and won't leave me.

Sometimes, I regret opening up to some people. They didn't deserve to know me like that.

[Kevin Tang 2,427]

A person with around the same age is usually one of my criteria on friendship.

Not that I don't want to be friends with other age groups, but some younger people just don't fit me and talking with older people as an equal friend just don't feel right.

And same interest! I usually be friends with those who have the same interest as me.

[lua 106]

be nice

have some of my interests

simple

[Dreambiscuit 10,180]

My standards for friendship are pretty basic. If someone approaches me with friendship, or I approach them, and we hit it off, that's all it really takes. I don't need a letter of recommendation or a secret handshake; it isn't that complicated. It's all about chemistry. If I get along with someone and there's stuff to talk about and maybe a few shared interests, friendship has stronger footing. When someone shows a degree of dedication and respect, so much the better. Friendship will set its own standards; when a quality friendship develops it can be recognized easily and it goes from there. It's all about two people 'clicking' together and getting along. 

[Lucky Bolt 35,088]

I just look for someone who's nice, funny, has at least a couple things in common with me and isn't super judgemental or dramatic. 

Edited April 13, 2019 by Lucky Bolt

[Here No Longer 5,279]

Well, in my case there's a few "levels" I suppose, and it can take some time for most people to get to that point with me. I'm not very sociable and I'm really awkward in real life.

 

1. Acquaintance- I know you well enough, and you seem like a decent person.  This level doesn't really count as a friend though to be honest. But of everyone who would be mentioned here that I know now, I can count on one hand those who don't fit into this category.
2. Friend- I feel somewhat comfortable around you and I may actually talk to you... some. Yes, I can even be a bit cold around my own friends. But, these people are the people that I would probably spend some of my time around, and that I would sometimes talk to about some things. I'm about as comfortable as this with most of my family, also.
3. Best Friend-  I know you really well, and I feel really comfortable around you. I can tell somebody on this level things I wouldn't tell anyone else. Although in that case most people on this forum count, these are people that know me in real life, which I've never seen any of you in real life unless any of you were at San Antonio's San Japan Convention that I went to last year than I may have, but it's unlikely. Nonetheless, I'm comfortable enough around these people. As of now, only one person fits here though... 
4. Boyfriend- Only one person of the male sex can fit in this category, and right now there is a smart, sweet, and cute guy that occupies it.   Basically, if you're the one in this category, I love you more than anything else in the world, and you have become my world (S___).