general Is being romantically in love with someone as special as it's made out to be?

[AlicornSpell 146]

I'm starting to not see what's so special about being romantically in love with someone. I mean about more than half of romantic couples either break up with each other or divorce each other, while most platonic best friends remain friends until death. 

So I'm starting to think that having a platonic best friend is a lot better than having a romantic partner or spouse is. 

Edited March 30, 2020 by AlicornSpell

[Dashy 4 Ever 4,835]

My friendship with my best friend just ended because my ex. I suggest you find a nice "special" friend to enjoy your time with together and probably in the future, after you know it's perfect and meant to be, continue with the relationship to the next level. Don't make the same mistake I made, and remember that its better to take all the time in the world with your relationships   .

Edited June 1, 2019 by Sondash Studios

[CheeryFox 23,820]

I guess...it can fade--last forever or whatever. There's a linchpin in every relationship and it's only as good as the foundation itself. It is special - even if it's your 10th time. 

[Here No Longer 5,276]

I didn't used to think so, but now, honestly, I say it's everything it's cracked up to be! Though I would say so in the positive and negative senses of that.

I'll just say that the past three months have been the best of my life, but I know how it feels to break up with a crazy man who was obsessed with me to the point that he got utterly upset by the fact I was breaking up with him, even though he clearly had no interest in the relationship anyways, for sexual reasons.

Edited June 1, 2019 by DusksuD

[Twilight Luna 31,340]

It's better to have loved and to have lost, than not to have loved at all. Every relationship has its ups and downs. It's up to you to decide whether or not if the downsides are being outshined by the upsides.

Edited June 1, 2019 by Twilight Luna

[Rainbow Dash Swag 285]

Nope just ended up hurting in the end 

I stopped caring about being in a relationship because when you care about someone you care when they’re gone

[Dreambiscuit 9,577]

Being romantically in love with someone is the greatest gift I can imagine. It elevates life to something deeper and more meaningful than I can ever describe. Before I was married I thought it would be nice to be involved on such a level but never really realized just how special it actually is. There are many happy marriages, and to look at the demographics for how many of them fail is not an accurate depiction of the situation. The majority of the 50% or so of failed marriages consists of a much smaller group of people getting married over and over rather than literally half of all married people throwing in the towel. It looks like a lot of bad marriages when in fact it’s just a few bad apples skewing the overall perception of the institution. I’m not saying all marriages are perfect, but most married people I know are happy and committed to them.  

[They call me Loyalty 1,948]

Romantic relationships often break up because the platonic aspect of romanticism doesn't reflect the human reality of life. So, I would consider a complete relationship more valuable than one merely platonic. But, it requires maturity to see past the illusion, psychologically, emotionally and physically.

It is important to differentiate what is platonic, from what is real. To be faced in a relationship with another human being encompasses more aspects than merely the ideological, which is more difficult, yet also more fructful, since you will faced with yourself. While In the ideal, often people see what they want to see. And you can see how the world is affected by the conflicts of ideology.

I would suggest to engage in a human level with reality.

[Cash In 22,213]

Speaking from the little experience I have, being romantically involved does have it's share of perks, in addition to making you feel really great and special overall. As with everything there are downsides. Whether pursuing it is worth it, is up to the person to decide. As for myself, I'd rather stick to being by myself, though that has it's own set of pros and cons.

[Envy 6,142]

When you meet someone really special it can be amazing. Even when it doesn't last forever, which, that relationship most certainly did not, sadly. All types of relationships (including friendships) come and go. That doesn't mean that they weren't worth it in the end.

[AlicornSpell 146]

On 5/31/2019 at 10:43 PM, DusksuD said:

I didn't used to think so, but now, honestly, I say it's everything it's cracked up to be! Though I would say so in the positive and negative senses of that.

I'll just say that the past three months have been the best of my life, but I know how it feels to break up with a crazy man who was obsessed with me to the point that he got utterly upset by the fact I was breaking up with him, even though he clearly had no interest in the relationship anyways, for sexual reasons.

 

On 6/1/2019 at 12:37 AM, Dreambiscuit said:

Being romantically in love with someone is the greatest gift I can imagine. It elevates life to something deeper and more meaningful than I can ever describe. Before I was married I thought it would be nice to be involved on such a level but never really realized just how special it actually is. There are many happy marriages, and to look at the demographics for how many of them fail is not an accurate depiction of the situation. The majority of the 50% or so of failed marriages consists of a much smaller group of people getting married over and over rather than literally half of all married people throwing in the towel. It looks like a lot of bad marriages when in fact it’s just a few bad apples skewing the overall perception of the institution. I’m not saying all marriages are perfect, but most married people I know are happy and committed to them.  

How is being romantically in love with someone such a great special thing when it now seems people have a stronger bond with their platonic best friends than they do with their romantic partner or spouse? 

 

Just go visit some of these websites, and you will know what I mean.

This website listed why having a platonic best friend is better than having a romantic partner or spouse is:

https://www.elitedaily.com/p/your-best-friend-is-better-than-a-boyfriend-girlfriend-heres-why-9047913

These websites listed why having a platonic guy best friend is better than having a boyfriend is for girls:

https://www.elitedaily.com/life/culture/14-reasons-guy-best-friend-better-boyfriend/974585

https://www.theodysseyonline.com/10-reasons-why-having-guy-best-friend-better-than-boyfriend

http://blog.relationshipsurgery.com/14-reasons-having-a-guy-best-friend-is-better-than-having-a-boyfriend/

https://onedio.co/content/14-brutal-facts-explaining-why-a-guy-best-friend-is-better-than-a-boyfriend-11710

These websites listed why having a platonic girl best friend is better than having a girlfriend is for guys:

https://www.relrules.com/reasons-best-friend-girlfriend-is-the-best-gf/

https://www.elitedaily.com/life/best-friend-is-better-than-gf/1104624

http://diceview.com/7-reasons-why-having-a-girl-best-friend-is-better-than-a-girlfriend/

https://www.theodysseyonline.com/girl-friend-better-than-girlfriend

 

So platonic best friends are a lot better than romantic partners and spouses are.

Romantic partners and spouses are just temporary. If you break up or divorce them, it's hard to go back to them.

With your platonic best friend, you're going to make things work, because they are your best friend, they are your go to partner. It's always easier to make amends with them than it is with a romantic partner or spouse.

Edited March 30, 2020 by AlicornSpell

[Olly 1,011]

Being actually in love with someone is beyond words. Yes, it is as good as you hear it is. That's not to say you won't break up, you probably will... but even so, for most people it's a very important thing to have had at some time.

[AlicornSpell 146]

Also, there are a lot of toxic romantic relationships, while there isn't that many toxic platonic relationships. Like an example is that abuse happens a lot in romantic relationships, while abuse is rare in platonic relationships. So there is a lot of abusive romantic relationships, while there isn't that many abusive platonic relationships.

Why do you think abusive romantic relationships have a term for them called "domestic violence", while abusive platonic relationships don't have a term for them? It's because abuse in platonic relationships are very rare, while abuse in romantic relationships happens a lot.

And also, a lot of people cheat on their romantic partners with someone else, while most people won't do stuff like that with their platonic best friends.

So those would be other reasons why platonic love is a lot better than romantic love is.

Edited June 30, 2022 by AlicornSpell

[Lucky Bolt 35,062]

I’ll say from my experience, it can be the most heartbreaking but also the most amazing thing to exist. 

[AlicornSpell 146]

On 2020-03-23 at 1:37 PM, AlicornSpell said:

Also, there are a lot of toxic romantic relationships, while there isn't that many toxic platonic relationships. Like an example is that abuse happens a lot in romantic relationships, while abuse is rare in platonic relationships. So there is a lot of abusive romantic relationships, while there isn't that many abusive platonic relationships.

Why do you think abusive romantic relationships have a term for them called "domestic violence", while abusive platonic relationships don't have a term for them? It's because abuse in platonic relationships are very rare, while abuse in romantic relationships happens a lot.

And also, a lot of people cheat on their romantic partners with someone else, while most people won't do stuff like that with their platonic best friends.

So those would be other reasons why platonic love is a lot better than romantic love is.

Sometimes I think the romantic type of love isn't real, while I never doubted the existence of the platonic type of love. 

Edited June 30, 2022 by AlicornSpell

[TBD 17,254]

I never been in a relationship before, but I did fall in love once. I can't explain how that feels in words. But I guess it just makes me feel happy to think about it how much I love this person. This song expressed it better than how I'd say it.

Spoiler

 

Unfortunately it didn't end well.  It took me awhile to forget her, but despite of this I have no regrets. 

[Splashee 28,563]

It is a special as you make it to be. you are the deciding factor. You can listen to others and you can listen to yourself. If you find it to be the best thing ever because others say it is so, then you don't really have your own opinion or experience.

 

The first time love, is like the unique thing. And it usually doesn't last. it is an illusion. That's my take on it.

[Spark Plug 27]

It can be, depends on how you look at it I guess? If you’re in a relationship with someone who makes it worthwhile, then yes! It absolutely is. 

[The Historian 516]

Seems like Alicorn Spell is trying their damnedest to "prove" that platonic friendships are better when that is not something that can be objectively proven. This is an entirely subjective topic. There is no objective test that states one is definitively better than the other. Both have their pros and cons.

For me, my best friend is fantastic. She's helped me get through so much shit over the last decade and I don't know what I do without her. She is absolutely wonderful and I'm lucky to have her as a friend. She's more like a sister to me than best friend. That being said, our friendship does not provide the same sort of companionship I get with a romantic partner. While I haven't known my boyfriend, or girlfriend for that matter, nearly as long as my bestie, I have a very different connection with them. And yes, I've had romantic relationships in the past that ended. That does not mean that they are lesser than another form of companionship.

[Vefka 1,499]

I assume you think like this because there's a many examples of such relations. I think the problem is that we can't find a good partner for ourselves. How people choose a partner? Many of us just see pretty man/woman, start to like each other and become a couple. But after a while romantic starts to fade away and you find out that he/she has a terrible character, you don't have almost anything in common, etc. On the other hand, we choose friends based on our interests, worldview, etc, so we always have things to talk about and don't get bored with each other

[Pastel Heart 6,466]

On one hand, I think it's very fulfilling and can be the most beautiful feeling in the world! ♡ yes I'm a Disney character

When they're far away, it can hurt cos all i wanna do is be by their side... someday though.

[Oblivion 20,266]

Oh course it's all sunshine and rainbows! All up until the point and time you get a cast iron pot thrown at your head, then it isn't so magical anymore!

[Early Sunsets 2,106]

In my eyes, true romantic love is the best and purest form of love. It's just difficult to find a person you're compatible with. Sure, you could probably make a relationship work with just about anyone, but true romance is on a whole other level. It's when you wake up next to someone ten, twenty, fifty, or more years later just as in love with them as you were on day one, or even more so.

That being said, even true love isn't perfect. Just like regular friendships, there's road bumps that you have to work through, but it's definitely worth it.

[Cagey 4,248]

Love is just an intense form of friendship. Romantic relationships have higher highs and lower lows than ordinary relationships, but if you’re doing it right, your life partner should be your best friend. That’s the kind of bond that tends to work out, not the stereotypical lovey-dovey kind. But either way, people usually can’t predict how a relationship will turn out, romantic or otherwise. Life might throw a wrench in your plans, or it might not. You never know unless you try. 

[AlicornSpell 146]

On 4/4/2020 at 11:27 PM, The Historian said:

For me, my best friend is fantastic. She's helped me get through so much shit over the last decade and I don't know what I do without her. She is absolutely wonderful and I'm lucky to have her as a friend. She's more like a sister to me than best friend. That being said, our friendship does not provide the same sort of companionship I get with a romantic partner. 

But isn't having someone who's like a sibling to you a lot better than having a romantic partner is?

Also, because of her being like a sister to you, wouldn't you be closer to her than you would with a romantic partner? 

Edited April 6, 2020 by AlicornSpell