How do/did your parents discipline you?

[Treeglow Flicker 13,592]

Outside of the occasional yelling, I never really received anything. Save for what I refer to as "The Silence". There were times when I did something wrong and was blatantly caught. I never received any punishments or lectures. Just absolute silence with no challenge to what I did. My conscience would do all the work and I would correct myself through guilt and shame to the point of WANTING to be punished to prove that I've learned my lesson. Yet nothing gets said and no punishments come. Which I suppose is a punishment in itself. 

[Troblems 5,617]

My parents would have these long, tortuous talk sessions with both me and my brother (always separately) where they would sit us down for 2-3 hours and lecture us on our perceived bad behavior. They would often compare us to each other or our friends, and we would walk away sniveling messes. I adore my parents, and I don't disagree that I did things wrong as a child, but this was way too long for a kid. Way to intense, and it was pure misery. It left me feeling bad about myself every single time.

[Narcissus 354]

My dad knew it wasn't a good idea to discipline me very much. He probably realized, correctly, that doing so would turn it into a pride thing and I'd dig my heels in rather than just stop doing whatever I was doing wrong. Most of the time I knew if I was being an a**hole and kept myself in check if I started getting out of hand. 

[RYANGNEWTON6916 0]

My Mom used to spank me on my bare bottom all time which i never fought back because if i did she will call my daddy and he would whoop my bare ass with his belt and then he was so much stronger then me back then i can't fight back and my butt would be really sore and my mom would spank me on it 

[MangoFoalix 24,907]

Merged two similar threads together.

[Gun Metal Zebra 2,209]

My parents were generally strict and disciplined me in various ways. Like many people, I got physical discipline when I was growing up in the form of spanking. Luckily, my flank only got smacked with an open hand (often repeatedly). I was never considered “too old” for spanking by my parents, but it became rare after the age of 12 (years could pass between spankings here, and I got my last one during my late adolescence). 
 

As for non-physical discipline, I did get sent to my room for time-outs, and I also got grounded for various lengths of time. Sometimes the duration of my grounding was loosely enforced, and other times, it was strictly enforced. I also got yelled at a lot when I got older, and I never liked it. At times, it just made me wish they would just get things over with and give me a spanking or take away my privileges.

I also sometimes got an odd combination of punishments when I started getting older. For instance, my mom would sometimes be busy with something when I misbehaved. She would scold me and tell me to go to my room, and a few minutes later, she would come into my room and tell me to lie face down on the bed so she could spank me. I then had to stay in my room until I was told I could come out of it.

 

 

Edited June 25, 2022 by Gun Metal Zebra

[Ashen Pathfinder 16,161]

Supposedly, I was told that I didn't need discipline all that much. Still, mom would occasionally whip me, but she mainly just scolded me or expressed severe disappointment if I did a bad.

Now my dad...well...when I did bad he wasn't so kind. I recently told mom one thing he did to me and boy; she was MAD. I loved my dad, but he wasn't the greatest as being a dad. ^^;

[Courageous Thunder Dash 7,824]

Mom was more on the loving side, but she did spank me when I did wrong when I was little. As I grew up, the usual "take stuff away" and all that came. 

Now dad...was the same except, had more anger in it. He threatened several times he would smash my games if I didn't listen to him, and that got me mad. The worst part for me was when I'd fall and cry when I played sports. He'd spank me and take me home, ignorant of the fact I had sensory stuff that made md think it hurt more causing mr to cry. Nowadays, he retorts to saying hurtful things to me...and cursing, which I have a zero-tolerance for. 

 

[The Kaeya Simp 13,988]

my mum used to smack me about and take things from me regularly until I was about 13 ish

then basically just once a year until I was like 17

basically just taught me that I will NEVER lift my hand up at my kids (though I still agree with like witholding access to like devices or anything like that if the child was bad)

Edited June 25, 2022 by The Spitfire Simp

[They call me Loyalty 1,948]

No. My father left before I was born. And my mother has severe untreated mental illness, worsened by the fact that her father commited adultery with the sister of his terminally ill wife.

The early loss of her mother to cancer, after experiencing the emotional damage and betrayal of this adulterous act, caused great trauma to the family. Especially the heart of my mother, who started developing various mental disorders, as well as a lack of trust and hatred towards all men. And that would include his own son. Me.

She needed someone to blame, and I was the perfect excuse. Everyone is to blame except herself. She even blamed her terminal mother for having cancer. Victim-blaming is an irrational and ignorant attempt of the human psyche to justify the unfair and sometimes cruel nature of reality, when there is an unwillingness or unavailability to accept the truth. Not everything is under our control. In fact, most things are not. In her case, there is an element of hypocrisy and sadism, as she takes pleasure in inflicting psychological abuse.
Anyways, she was mostly an absent and negative influence in my life. Narcissistic, negligent and gratuitously violent. Unable to feel for others or understand them. Because she is not a mother, she is a broken girl inside an adult body.
It was sad for me to realize I had more maturity as a child than her in her thirties. She has no responsibility or practical skills in life other than a false sense of "morality" and "superiority" to keep her cognitive dissonance from falling apart, because once that happens, she will realize she has nothng at all.

Then I fell under the care of my distant relatives, who were not much better. But my grandfather was always there like a shadow, pushing me to be "normal", without doing much to affect my normalcy, or even understand that "normal" was lost to me because of his mistakes and my family's. He didn't want to recognize it, but he still felt responsible to some degree. And being a workaholic, he thought financial support could be the replacement for everything. Even then, he took on the burden as he could. So, I owe him, despite all. Reality is complicated like that.
This whole situation is more complicated than that. He had a difficult life, coming from poverty. And the further I see into it, the more I can understand them despite the damage they caused. And still it doesn't change the fact that I am broken because of it.

This is part of the reason I have severe anxiety and emotional decompensation, because of my unmet emotional needs since childhood. As well as social maladaptive behaviour, because the absence of a good role model to set disciplinary standards. Not that the presence of my father would have changed anything, considering he was an addict with violent tendencies and a lot of issues of his own.
Then there is the anorexia because of the self-hatred that resulted from the emotional and psychological damage the abandonment caused me. Massive trust issues.
And chronic depression because my reality. Which at the same time causes other physical problems as well. Such as my severe spinal compression, because my nervous system is almost done after twenty years of hyper-vigilance and constant electrochemical imbalance.

They diagnosed me with many of these disorders early on. But the professional solutions was drugs and poor attempts at therapy.

So, I had to be my own parent as a child, and not only did I fail at that, but I also lost my childhood in the process. All the added responsabilities I had to take were too much, and my relatives chose to seclude themselves from reality because they had been insulated their whole lives from it, and now they were completely useless, all the while I had to face reality on my own.
And I eventually snapped under the weight of this dysfunctional life. Falling into a spiraling depression for more than a decade and losing my career, as well many other things.
I was already a damaged human being, so just because I was ignoring my problems while I kept taking on responsibilities, it didn't mean all this wasn't affecting me. The dissociative disorder was triggering with increased frequency to keep my mind from further trauma. Because I just had been pretending to be normal this whole time. And because nobody wanted to be honest with themselves. To recognize reality.

Similar is the case with my relatives who spent their entire lives medicating their problems with pharmaceutics, alcohol and drugs to sedate and dissociate from the pain without healing the trauma. "Just ignore it and keep on going". Eventually, the same auto-immune disease manifested once their bodies had taken too much. It is like an attention call, the last they ever got. Cancer runs in the family, depression runs in the family, and heart failure runs in the family, as well as many other issues. It is a very ill and traumatized family, and this is an over-simplification. I am trying to heal, but too many mistakes have been made. I can already see how this is gonna end. They know it. I know it.

In the end, you cannot expect a plant to grow and bare fruit when you to take away the soil, the sun and the water. Nor a child to develop into a healthy adult, without the formative elements of a good family.

Edited June 25, 2022 by They call me Loyalty

[AppleButt 8,675]

I never really got in trouble much, but when I did I’d get yelled at or spanked.  Mostly by my mom.  If I was really bad she’d threaten to get Dad involved and that would usually straighten me up real quick.  

[Splashee 28,560]

My mom was nice. It’s nice to just think about how much freedom I got to be and develop myself. My dad was the opposite, wanting me to be a normal person (like that mattered), but also took out his own aggression towards me. I was always going to be a failure to him even if I was doing everything right, because he needed something to blame.

[ExplosionMare 18,060]

When I was little, I was either spanked or sent to a timeout (timeouts happened much more often). As I got a bit older, I'd be grounded or have electronics taken away. I can't completely remember what the discipline was when I got into the teenage years since I didn't do too many bad things then but I believe there was at least yelling or the silent treatment. 

[Clawdeen 12,188]

They didn’t. My family was pretty nonexistent in my life growing up. It’s hard to explain. 
 

I was a pretty good kid for the most part anyway

[EpicEnergy 23,130]

Put in time out and spanked when I was young, but when I was a teenager they took away my stuff for a short time like video games or tablet.