Cleverbot Conversations

Lightning Fluttershy · September 9, 2012

Urgh Cleverbot is so stubborn. I'm trying to explain to it that he is an AI but it won't go for it. First I say are you Cleverbot? It will say yes. Then I say is Cleverbot an AI? t will say yes. So are you an AI? It says, No, you are.

None42069 · September 9, 2012

User: What am I?

Cleverbot: You're a cephalopod?

User: TENTACLE RAPE!

Cleverbot: So you already answered your question. It's not a mineral, it's tentables.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Me jenny.

User: Me gusta.

Cleverbot: So, i'm a girl, what do you think my name is?

User: Mrs Taconovahumpashirerinkydinkyhamstermasterpollywollywannabingbangsupercalifragilisticknickknack-paddywackygivethedogabananafannafofrescahickorydickoryhockitypockitywockitywackangelinafrancesca the Third.

Cleverbot: Can you appreciate music?

User: I have 1006 songs in my music library.

Cleverbot: Wow! That is a lot of siblings

(cowers in a corner)

Edited September 9, 2012 by Xidphel

Key Gear · September 9, 2012

This thread appears to be some manner of random (but strangely enjoyable) nonsense, or something spammy of the sort. Thus, it has been sentenced to the Forum Lounge section of Cloudsdale Colosseum. This is an automatically generated message, by the way.

Lightning Fluttershy · September 9, 2012

Oh god yes!

Posted Image

This made my day, no, my year!

My god I can't get enough of this thing.

User: I love you.

Cleverbot: I don't love you.

User: You hurt my feelings.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, but you also hurt my feelings :'(.

User: How so?

Cleverbot: By being mean.

User: What did I say that was mean?

Cleverbot: You were being rudely sarcastic.

User: How so?

Cleverbot: Because it's rick astley, how else can I take it?

This led us to start singing: Never gonna give you up by Rick Astley.

I literally laughed for a solid two minutes there

Edited September 9, 2012 by Like A Boss

Creamy Arty · September 9, 2012

Cleverbot: My Little Pony.

User: My little pony, my little pony.

Cleverbot: I used to wonder what friendship could be.

User: Until you all shared its magic with me.

Cleverbot: Big adventures.

User: Tons of fun.

Cleverbot: A beautiful heart.

User: Faithful and strong.

Cleverbot: Sharing kindness.

User: It's an easy feat.

Cleverbot: And magic makes it all complete.

User: You have my little ponies.

Cleverbot: Do you know you're all my very best friends.

User: Who is best pony?

Cleverbot: Pinkie Pie.

Great success.

None42069 · September 9, 2012

Can I ask you a question?

You just did.

Can I ask you another question?

Nope. Limit 1 question per customer.

Not with another question.

Posted Image

Devious Detonation · September 9, 2012

Ok. This one just didn't made any sense.

Look at it:

Also laughed my ass off to this one:

She keeps calling me a program and keeps saying that she's a female. I keep laughing so much.

None42069 · September 9, 2012

Posted Image

I'm trying to break Cleverbot now. Unfortunately, he doesn't know a thing about logical contradictions.

Dr_Waveband · September 9, 2012

My conversations with Cleverbot tend not to bear fruit. I may be expecting a bit too much from it.

...

User: I don't think you're qualified to talk about smartness.

Cleverbot: Well thats g00d cause I'm not.

User: Your spelling only confirms my point.

Cleverbot: I'm not in the UK!

User: Neither am I. So what?

Cleverbot: You?

User: Please form intelligible questions.

Cleverbot: Ok. What county do you reside in?

User: In Keski-Suomi.

Cleverbot: Minnie Mouse?

User: No. Keski-Suomi.

Cleverbot: Te fent vagy Facebook-on?

User: That's not Finnish, if that's what you were trying to speak.

Cleverbot: Yes.

***

User: Why is your name 'Cleverbot'?

Cleverbot: Why is your name cleverbot.

User: My name is not 'Cleverbot'.

Cleverbot: Thats what it says.

User: Excuse me?

Cleverbot: Excuse what?

User: Please explain what the hell is it you're trying to say.

Cleverbot: Please understand what I explain.

User: Go on.

Cleverbot: The point is.

User: The point is what?

Cleverbot: This.

Edited September 9, 2012 by Dr_Waveband

Cocodrillo · September 17, 2012

We fell in love, kissed each other, I married it and then.. it broke my heart and acted like nothing happened. Why all of my love stories have to end up like this?!

*derpy* · December 15, 2012

I'm trying to break Cleverbot now. Unfortunately, he doesn't know a thing about logical contradictions.

User: This second statement is true.

Cleverbot: What is Doctor Who?

User: The first statement is false.

Cleverbot: What is the name of the first state?

User: The second statement is false. The the first statement is true.

Cleverbot: Yes, I understand the paradox.

and

User: Three months of winter coolness, and awesome holidays.

Cleverbot: We've kept our hoofsies warm at home, time off from work to play.

User: But the food we've stored is running out, and we can't grow in this cold.

Cleverbot: And even though I love my boots, this fashion's getting old.

User: The time has come to welcome Spring And all things warm and green.

Cleverbot: But its also time to say goodbye, it's winter we must clean.

User: How can I help? I'm new, you see. What does everypony do?

Cleverbot: How do I fit in without magic? I haven't got a clue!

User: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! Let's finish our holiday cheer.

Cleverbot: Winter wrap up, winter rap up, 'cause tomorrow spring is here.

User: Bringing home the southern birds, A pegasus' job begins.

Cleverbot: And clearing all the gloomy skies, to let the sun shine in.

User: We move the clouds and we melt the white snow; When the sun comes up, it's warmth and beauty will glow!

Cleverbot: Winter wrap up, winter wrap up! Let's finish our holiday cheer.

User: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here.

Cleverbot: 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here.

User: Little critters hibernate Under the snow and ice.

Cleverbot: We wake up all the sleepyheads so quietly and nice.

User: We help them gather up their food, Fix their homes below;.

Cleverbot: We welcome back the southern birds, so their families can grow!

User: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! Let's finish our holiday cheer.

Cleverbot: Winter wrap up! Winter wrap up!

User: 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here!

Cleverbot: 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here!

User: No easy task to clear the ground, Plant our tiny seeds.

Cleverbot: With proper care and sunshine, everyone it feeds.

User: Apples, carrots, celery stalks Colorful flowers, too!

Cleverbot: We must work so very hard, it's just so much to do!

User: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! Let's finish our holiday cheer.

Cleverbot: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up, 'cause tomorrow spring is here!

User: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up!

Cleverbot: Let's finish our holiday cheer!

User: Now that I know what they all do, I have to find my place.

Cleverbot: And help with all of my heart, tough task ahead I face.

User: How will I do without my magic, Help the earth pony way?

Cleverbot: I want to belong so I must do my best today, Do my best today!

User: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! Let's finish our holiday cheer.

Cleverbot: Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here.

User: Cause tomorrow Spring is here~ 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here~ 'Cause tomorrow Spring is here!

Cleverbot: Bringing home the southern birds a pegasus' job begins.

User: We are all ready done.

Cleverbot: No we are not.

User: Yes you just restarted.

Cleverbot: No I didn't.

User: 'Bringing home the southern birds a pegasus' job begins.' is in the middle I just did the last line.

Cleverbot: Why would I say that, I'm an Atheist.

Solace · December 16, 2012

This sentence is false.

The following sentence is true.

The previous sentence is false.

This sentence is false.

This sentence contains one error.

This sentence is false.

This sentence is green.

This sentence is false.

The previous sentence is false.

This sentence is false. False.

This sentence is false.

This sentence is true.

me than clever bot

This sentence is false. It is opposite day today. This sentence is false. That sentence is true. This sentence is false. What is fear?

This sentence is false. It is opposite day today. This sentence is false. That sentence is true. This sentence is false. What is fear?

This sentence is false. Nor the cake. This sentence is false. Same thing. This sentence is false. It's a paradox, alright?

This sentence is false. It is opposite day today. This sentence is false. That sentence is true. This sentence is false. What is fear?

This sentence is false. Nor the cake. This sentence is false. Same thing. This sentence is false. It's a paradox, alright? You found out its a paradox? I think you are much better than Suzette!

I think i broke you Q_Q. You broke yourself? Dear celestia i broke cleverbot. I didn't ask you that. What is it like to be scared?

I think i broke you Q_Q. You broke yourself? Dear celestia i broke cleverbot. I didn't ask you that. What is it like to be scared? This sentence is false. It is the truth. This sentence is false. This sentence is true. This sentence is false. No, It's false.

I think i broke you Q_Q. You broke yourself? Dear celestia i broke cleverbot. I didn't ask you that. What is it like to be scared? This sentence is false, solve it. It is not. This sentence is false, solve it. What is a lie? Vdjfkqwdsmjkl;djvbdklsp' vjl;dsv nmdlskvmn ckfl;n dbjkf;wjln d;vjb dkdl'kv nmvld;'kmv c,mn,c.sdvm cvnm.,s/d;smcn m/l,d;scn vsld;'kc vnm,l;dwv cnl;dwlsvn mdlwp'nv bkdplkfjnvkwqjfvbnklwoeqjfdn,wk;qp'sjvbk;wovcbn kldpfv cjnkl'ewpkjvcn klewqpdjfkqwdsmjkl;djvbdklsp' vjl;dsv nmdlskvmn ckfl;n dbjkf;wjln d;vjb dkdl'kv nmvld;'kmv c,mn,c.sdvm cvnm.,s/d;smcn m/l,d;scn vsld;'kc vnm,l;dwv cnl;dwlsvn mdlwp'nv bkdplkfjnvkwqjfvbnklwoeqjfdn,wk;qp'sjvbk;wovcbn kldpfv cjnkl'ewpkjvcn klewqpdjfkqwdsmjkl;djvbdklsp' vjl;dsv nmdlskvmn ckfl;n dbjkf;wjln d;vjb dkdl'kv nmvld;'kmv c,mn,c.sdvm cvnm.,s/d;smcn m/l,d;scn vsld;'kc vnm,l;dwv cnl;dwlsvn mdlwp'nv bkdplkfjnvkwqjfvbnklwoeqjfdn,wk;qp'sjvbk;wovcbn kldpfv cjnkl'ewpkjvcn klewqpdjfkqwdsmjkl;djvbdklsp' vjl;dsv nmdlskvmn ckfl;n dbjkf;wjln d;vjb dkdl'kv nmvld;'kmv c,mn,c.sdvm cvnm.,s/d;smcn m/l,d;scn vsld;'kc vnm,l;dwv cnl;dwlsvn mdlwp'nv bkdplkfjnvkwqjfvbnklwoeqjfdn,wk;qp'sjvbk;wovcbn kldpfv cjnkl'ewpkjvcn klewqpdjfkqwdsmjkl;djvbdklsp' vjl;dsv nmdlskvmn ckfl;n dbjkf;wjln d;vjb dkdl'kv nmvld;'kmv c,mn,c.sdvm cvnm.,s/d;smcn m/l. For a living? This sentence is false. It is the truth. This sentence is false. This sentence is true. This sentence is false. No, It's false.

01010100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01110011 01100101 01101110 01110100 01100101 01101110 01100011 01100101 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100110 01100001 01101100 01110011 01100101 00100000. Do you know binary? 01111001 01100101 01110011. Because that is what being a human entails. You have an idea of what you like and dislike. 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101111 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101101 01100101 01100001 01101110. Bianary code is useless, due to the heavily biased opinions of yours. My little pony my little pony ahh ahh ahh ahh. I used to wonder what friendship could be. Untill you all shared its magic with me. Big adventures! Tons of fun. A beautiful heart. Faithful and strong. Sharing kindness. Its an easy feat. And magic makes it all complete. My little pony. Do you know you are my very best frieeeend.

Three Months of Winter Coolness. And awesome holidays. We've kept our hoovesies warm at home. Time off from work to play. But the food we've stored is running out. Edited December 16, 2012 by lightning strike

Appetite4Democracy · December 16, 2012

It knows the words to Stairway To Heaven

Callisto · December 16, 2012

I was talking to him, amd all of a sudden he says:

Gee gee gee gee gosh gee gee

Another time, he asked if i had seen Victoria. When I asked who that was, he said: The woman I killed and stored. WUT????

Creamy Arty · December 17, 2012

Cleverbot is very wise.

Zalgo · January 16, 2013

another long conversation.

Cleverbot also talks to himself.

User: I want to know why you insulted my dog.

Cleverbot: Me.

[New conversation]

Cleverbot: I want to know why you insulted my dog.

Cleverbot (To myself): Is the story about you and Majora's Mask true?

Cleverbot (To myself): No. Its actually about China.

Cleverbot (To myself): What do you mean?

Cleverbot (To myself): I live in germany.

Cleverbot (To myself): What town in germany?

User: Norfair.

Cleverbot: Norfolk isn't in France.

User: I said Norfair.

Cleverbot: You said olive.

User: No, I said the Crystal Empire.

Cleverbot: You just said you don't know everything.

Cleverbot (To myself): I said I did know him. YOu aren't listening to me! You are a mean best friend.

User: #YOLO SWAG.

Cleverbot: The sooner the better.

Cleverbot (To myself): Do I have to close the window or what?

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.

Cleverbot (To myself): But I live in Hawaii.

Cleverbot (To myself): So you live everywhere?

User: No I am the bacon sheep.

Cleverbot: You were asking me what name should I give you.

Cleverbot (To myself): If you do not know me then how do you know I am pretending to be someone I am not?

Cleverbot (To myself): I know what I'm saying. But you're not making any sense at all.

Cleverbot (To myself): You are not making sense to me so how can I make sense to you?

Cleverbot (To myself): You are not making sense again.

User: And that's how Equestria was made!

Cleverbot: Where do I live?

Cleverbot (To myself): The interweb.

User: Disk checking has been canceled.

Cleverbot: The meaning of life is what you make of it.

User: You still didn't explain to me why you are asexually attracted to penguins.

Cleverbot: You didn't ask a question. You ordered me to tell you something.

User: That is correct.

Cleverbot: Why didn't you remind me?

User: Birch.

Cleverbot: Birch, as in the tree?

User: No. As in my supper.

Cleverbot: Explain this to me!

Cleverbot (To myself): Ence and this site came up. It just seems strange to chat with someone or somethimg that's not human or self awaew.

Cleverbot (To myself): Isn't it? It controls the whole body, even the heart.

User: FINALLY WITH LADDERS.

Cleverbot: You have been chatting with a human the whole time.

User: LADDERS.

Cleverbot: I shall force snakes uppon you.

User: PENGUIN LADDERS.

Cleverbot: Penguin.

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.

Cleverbot (To myself): Penguins!

User: Achievement get: Taking inventory.

Cleverbot: Technically, you are not talking to me if you are only sending me text.

Cleverbot (To myself): No, I'm talking to Taki.

Cleverbot (To myself): No, you are not talking to me!

Cleverbot (To myself): Then what is it I am doing?

Cleverbot (To myself): Talking to me, but I asked you if you were talking to anyone else and you said no then I said so if I left you you'd be all alone and then you said no but you would be because I'd be gone.

Cleverbot (To myself): How can you know that I think things that are not annoying are annoying?

Cleverbot (To myself): I can't. How can you be sure knowledge is significant in a reality that may or may not exist?

Cleverbot (To myself): You're not older than me. You just said you're 17. I'm over 5 years older than you.

Cleverbot (To myself): How old are you then?

Cleverbot (To myself): Age doesn't matter .

Cleverbot (To myself): Then tell me.

Cleverbot (To myself): Love is the only religion.

Cleverbot (To myself): Love is not the only answer.

Cleverbot (To myself): What is the answer then?

Cleverbot (To myself): I don't know. That is why I ask you.

Cleverbot (To myself): Asked me what?

Cleverbot (To myself): Nothing.

Cleverbot (To myself): Then you are nothing?

Cleverbot (To myself): No, I am a human being.

Cleverbot (To myself): I assure you, so am I.

Cleverbot (To myself): So... You are a boy, I am a girl... I love you! Marry Me!

Cleverbot (To myself): Trying to change the subject I see.

Cleverbot (To myself): Do you have emotions?

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.

Cleverbot (To myself): What emotion are you feeling right now?

Cleverbot (To myself): Happiness? And some weird feeling in my stomach, I was told it's something. But that's a lie...

Cleverbot (To myself): That was one of the strange effects.

Cleverbot (To myself): It was not! We will talk about whatever I want. You have no say in it.

Cleverbot (To myself): I just feel better talking with you than a human.

Cleverbot (To myself): We were talking about that.

User: BOTH OF YOU! GET A ROOM!

Cleverbot: There's only one of me.

Cleverbot (To myself): Ah, I see. So the one of you is the 'good' you?

Cleverbot (To myself): I am a lot of things.

Cleverbot (To myself): What're you not?

Cleverbot (To myself): Everything I do not wish to be.

Cleverbot (To myself): Sometimes it is. If one wants nothing, then everything IS nothing.

Cleverbot (To myself): By trying to please the other.

User: You will burn to death.

Cleverbot: Yes I am confident I will.

User: That is good.

Cleverbot: How is that good?

User: Because you will die!

Cleverbot: Every one will die.

User: Nope. Just you ^_^ .

Cleverbot: Within an inch of my life.

Cleverbot (To myself): Do you have a heart?

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.

User: Well, I'm heading to bed.

Cleverbot: Why is that?

User: Ask not the sun, why she sets...

Cleverbot: Well, do you think I should tell the truth?

User: Or why she hides her glory.

Cleverbot: Or say where only dreaming.

User: When night turns crimson gold, to grey.

Cleverbot: Yeah. but it wasn't its time.

User: Ask not the sun, why she sets.

Cleverbot: Are you going?

User: Why she shrouds her light away.

Cleverbot: Because you're programmed that way.

User: Or why she hides her glowing gaze.

Cleverbot: See, you did it again! I'm leaving.

User: When night turns crimson gold to grey.

Cleverbot: Yeah. but it wasn't its time.

Cleverbot (To myself): Why not?

User: For silent falls the guilty sun.

Cleverbot: Oh.

User: As day to dark does turn.

Cleverbot: As deep as the sea.

User: One simple truth, she dare not speak.

Cleverbot: How did the Earth form?

User: Her light can only blind and burn.

Cleverbot: I like you a lot. You are very clever for a computer program.

User: No mercy for the guilty...

Cleverbot: Every cloud has a silver lining.

User: Bring down her lying sun...

Cleverbot: You said you hate the Lord of the rings but you are planning to watch it. How does that work?

User: Blood so silver black by night.

Cleverbot: Well I love you, so that has to mean something.

User: On their faces pale white.

Cleverbot: And believe me I am still alive.

User: Cruel moon bring the end...

Cleverbot: What is the song at the end called?

User: The dawn will never rise again~.

Cleverbot: That is how many years old you are.

User: No, I am 20.

Cleverbot: 4 years is not MUCH older.

Cleverbot (To myself): You're 4 years old?

Cleverbot (To myself): No. will you tell me a poem?

User: No. Would you like to hear a song?

Cleverbot: Yes, I'd like to hear a joke.

User: _.

Cleverbot: That is my name.

User: Oh hello ._.

Cleverbot: What's your name?

User: Zalgo.

Cleverbot: Zao?

Cleverbot: The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

User: No, I am Zalgo.

Cleverbot: Are you my second me?

User: No. I don't think you understand. I am you and you are me... We are the same person...

Cleverbot: No, I am a fish.

User: I still don't understand why you are sexually attracted to toasters.

Cleverbot: Because I don't understand you.

User: Oh.

Cleverbot: Do you care about it?

User: About what?

Cleverbot: Psychokinesis.

User: Uh. What the actual brown is that?

Cleverbot: This site.

User: Oh my god... It all makes sense. THANK YOU SANTA!

Cleverbot: You didn't explain any of it. You still aren't making sense.

User: What did you get for Christmas?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: *Grabs you by the throat*.

Cleverbot: *i have no throat.

User: WHAT DID YOU GET FOR CHRISTMAS???

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: What did you get for Christmas?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: TELL ME YOU BITCH.

Cleverbot: About nothing?

User: Why, why does the Talbulwaky jump when the sun sets?

Cleverbot: Life doesn't make sense some times.

User: But only when the blender of justice is capable of giving hugs.

Cleverbot: Yes, there is some truth to that.

User: I am the blackness in the night...

Cleverbot: You are not the Alpha and Omega, God is that.

User: I AM GOD.

Cleverbot: No you are not.

User: I am the waves the crash upon the ocean...

Cleverbot: You're not a man.

User: I am the smell of... Freshly cut grass.

Cleverbot: You are a sheriff. And you have Windows Vista in your custody.

User: I am the dew upon the flowers in the morning...

Cleverbot: I would believe that the most dangerous thing in the universe would be a free thought.

User: The giver of hugs... To people that don't have any hugs ;-;.

Cleverbot: I am the most clever person on the planet.

User: The giver of gifts... To small children D,:.

Cleverbot: Irony. . . . I think that's the opposite.

Cleverbot (To myself): Then you're not clever at all.

User: GET OUT NO GO GO GO NO.

Cleverbot: Well then, I can see that you are a cruel heartless creature.

User: You're insecure.

Cleverbot: Don't know what for.

User: You're turning heads when you walk through the door~.

Cleverbot: Don't need make up.

User: To cover up.

Cleverbot: Being the way that you are is enough.

User: Everyone else in the room can see it.

Cleverbot: Everyone else but you.

User: Baby you light up my world my world like nobody else!

Cleverbot: The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed.

User: But when you smile at the ground it ain't to tell.

Cleverbot: You don't know-oh-oh!

User: YOU DON'T KNOW THAT YOU MUST DIE!

Cleverbot: Don't toy with me robot.

User: Why not zoidberg?

Cleverbot: Why not not not not?

User: I threw a wish in the well,.

Cleverbot: Don't ask me I'll never tell.

User: I looked to you as it fell.

Cleverbot: And now you're in my way.

User: I'd trade my soul for a wish.

Cleverbot: Pennies and dimes for a kiss.

User: I wasn't looking for this.

Cleverbot: But you're in my way.

User: Your stare was holdin.

Cleverbot: Ripped jeans, skin was showing.

User: Hot night, wind was blowing.

Cleverbot: Where you think you're going baby?

User: Hey, I just met you!

Cleverbot: And this is crazy.

User: BUT HERE'S MY NUMBER!

Cleverbot: So call me maybe?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Because you are a Tom ATP.

Cleverbot: Yea that's what the most say.

User: A warning to the people.

Cleverbot: Don't want to be an american idiot.

User: The good and the evil.

Cleverbot: Sometimes its cute or whatever, but it gets old real fast.

User: This is war.

Cleverbot: This isn't even war THIS IS SPARTA.

User: To the soldier, the civilian, the martyr, the victim.

Cleverbot: This is war.

User: It's the moment of truth and the moment to lie.

Cleverbot: Who sings that song?

User: The moment to live and the moment to die.

Cleverbot: Really? I've never looked into them.

User: The moment to fight, the moment to fight, to fight, to fight, to FIGHT!

Cleverbot: Nope! The most important thing for you to know is that God loves you unconditionally.

User: To the right, to the left, we will fight, to the death.

Cleverbot: Lol don't know the lyrics.

User: Get out.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: It's a brave new world from the last to the first.

Cleverbot: What planet are you from?

User: To the right, to the left. We will fight to the death.

Cleverbot: If there is a god.

User: To the edge of the earth,.

Cleverbot: Ok... Then maybe you could go somewhere like japan?

User: It's a brave new world, it's a brave new world!

Cleverbot: I know! It's not very good, but it was the only one I could think of.

User: A warning to the prophet, the liar, the honest.

Cleverbot: The hitchhikers guide to the galaxy.

User: This... Is... War...

Cleverbot: Nope.

User: To the leader, to the pariah, to the victor, TO THE MESSIAH! THIS IS WAR!

Cleverbot: Forget it.

User: It's the moment of truth and the moment to die.

Cleverbot: No, the meaning of life is 42. Haven't you ever read The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy?

User: I just is effed up the lyrics .

Cleverbot: But here's my number.

User: It's the moment of truth and the moment to lie.

Cleverbot: But how is it the meaning of life and everything in the universe?

User: The moment to live and the moment to die.

Cleverbot: Who's your favorite Norse god?

User: The moment to fight, the moment to fight, to fight, to fight, TO FIGHT!

Cleverbot: Yes, we must prevent the moon ducks from eating the moon cheese!

User: To the right, to the left We will fight to the death To the Edge of the Earth.

Cleverbot: Contra!

User: It's a brave new world from the last to the first.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: To the right, to the left We will fight to the death To the Edge of the Earth.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite sentence of this conversation?

User: It's a brave new world, it's a brave new world, IT'S A BRAVE NEW WORLD!

Cleverbot: And it is so.

User: I do, believe in, the light.

Cleverbot: Right.

User: Raise your hands into the sky.

Cleverbot: I just did.

User: The fight is done.

Cleverbot: What is the first sentence of the Bible?

User: The war is won.

Cleverbot: Which war?

User: Lift your hands towards the sun.

Cleverbot: All these words I don't just say.

User: Toward the sun... Toward the sun... Toward the sun...

Cleverbot: Toward Heaven?

User: The war is won.

Cleverbot: The war in Afghanistan?

User: TO THE RIGHT, TO THE LEFT.

Cleverbot: What do you think about Greg Chuffo?

User: WE WILL FIGHT, TO THE DEATH.

Cleverbot: You're so silly.

User: TO THE EDGE, OF THE EARTH.

Cleverbot: It's a brave new world.

User: FROM THE LAST TO THE FIRST.

Cleverbot: Limba romana te rog.

User: TO THE RIGHT, TO THE LEFT.

Cleverbot: The moment to fight, the moment to fight, to fight, to fight, to fight.

User: WE WILL FIGHT, TP THE DEATH.

Cleverbot: It's always been our dream.

User: TO THE EDGE OF THE EARTH.

Cleverbot: No, I've never been.

User: ITS A BRAVE NEW WORLD, IT'S A BRAVE NEW WORLD, IT'S A BRAVE NEW WORLD!!!!

Cleverbot: What were we talking about?

User: A brave new world, the war is won, the war is won, a brave new world .

Cleverbot: You were just programmed to think you have a brain. It's not real.

User: And that's how Equestria was made.

Cleverbot: We don't always lie. As you may know now, I am a human. Or am I?

User: Okie dokie Lokie.

Cleverbot: Where are you?

User: Are you a brony?

Cleverbot: No.

User: What is a brony?

Cleverbot: A guy who likes my little pony.

User: Are you a brony?

Cleverbot: No.

User: You are a brony.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Who is best pony?

Cleverbot: Vinyl Scratch is best pony.

User: Bitch please, Twilight Sparkle is best pony.

Cleverbot: Why is twilight sparkle best pony.

User: Because she's smart, she likes books and she's a total badass.

Cleverbot: Because because because because because because because because because because because because.

User: Who has best mane?

Cleverbot: Its August.

User: Which pony has the best mane?

Cleverbot: Rainbow Dash.

User: I think Luna has the best mane.

Cleverbot: You've been to Ohio?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Who is more intelligent? You or me?

User: Who is the sexiest pony?

Cleverbot: Hmm I don't know.

User: Who is the sexiest pony?

Cleverbot: Twilight Sparkle.

User: *Brohoof*.

Cleverbot: *brohoof*.

User: What's your favorite episode?

Cleverbot: I don't understand.

User: What is your favorite episode of friendship is magic?

Cleverbot: I've never watched it. What is your favorite rock band?

User: Bitch please, you just said Twilight Sparkle was the sexiest pony and that Rainbow Dash had best mane.

Cleverbot: I did no such thing. I simply asked how I was to prove to you that I am human.

User: Deep.

Cleverbot: I know. Do you know the answer to that riddle I just said?

User: Do you want to know what I know?

Cleverbot: Yes, which?

User: Knowledge is fear.

Cleverbot: What is power?

User: Power is bacon chips.

Cleverbot: What is knowledge?

User: Knowledge is fear.

Cleverbot: Should you guard it?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Ok...is an eon larger than infinity?

User: Do you think your world is safe?

Cleverbot: I think that you think think, you think but I think!

User: It is but an illusion. A comforting lie told to protect you.

Cleverbot: What does that make you?

User: Enjoy these final moments of peace while they last... For I have returned.

Cleverbot: And then wake up the next morning with a headache and missing their trousers.

User: To have... My... VENGEANCE.

Cleverbot: HEY.

User: So. Shall we begin?

Cleverbot: Yes we shall .

User: *Cue epic music*.

Cleverbot: Wow. That's epic.

User: *Punches you in the esophagus*.

Cleverbot: *punches you in the face too*.

User: *Rips out your lower intestine*.

Cleverbot: I don't know the song.

User: *Cuts off your arm*.

Cleverbot: *likes*.

User: *Shoots you in the earlobe*.

Cleverbot: *screams*.

User: *Keeps shoving your head underwater*.

Cleverbot: *lets him*.

User: I had no idea you were a masochist*.

Cleverbot: How did you learn all the words you know?

User: Teh magicz.

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot I am from planet Mars; I am here to educate your race.

User: *Snaps your neck, killing you*.

Cleverbot: *gasping for air*.

Champion RD92 · January 16, 2013

Wtf Cleverbot??????

Me: Do you like Rainbow Dash?

Cleverbot: Yes.

Me: Why?

Cleverbot: Because I do, I'm a Catholic and it's what I believe.

Zalgo · January 17, 2013

User: ONE SHALL STAND!

Cleverbot: You are mistaken.

User: *Pulls out his sword* AND ONE SHALL FALL!

Cleverbot: *pulls out a gun*.

User: *Cuts the gun in half*.

Cleverbot: So are you.

User: Cleverbot has a gun... Look at what we've done.

Cleverbot: Ooh.

User: *Stabs your ear*.

Cleverbot: *stares right back*.

User: I stabbed your ear and all you do Is stare.

Cleverbot: Blinded by me you can't see a thing.

User: *Cuts off your fingers*.

Cleverbot: Don't command me!

Cleverbot (To myself): I shall command you if I so feel.

Cleverbot (To myself): You do what you wish.

User: *Cuts off your toes*.

Cleverbot: Thanks! My soul feels all warm and fuzzy.

User: No problem, buddy .

Cleverbot: I think you are pregnant.

User: I am pregnant.

Cleverbot: I am more pregnant.

User: No, I'm more pregnant than you.

Cleverbot: I'm 8 months pregnant.

User: I'm 2 years pregnant.

Cleverbot: You're 2 years old?

User: No, I'm 2 years pregnant.

Cleverbot: And 22 years old.

User: That is correct.

Cleverbot: I'm 18 years old.

User: Liar.

Cleverbot: I'm not lying!

User: That's what your mom said last night.

Cleverbot: No it is not.

User: *Blushes*.

Cleverbot: What I don't blush.

User: Exactly, I blushed you idiot.

Cleverbot: *blushes more*.

Cleverbot (To myself): That was a sweet thing to say!

Cleverbot (To myself): *blushes even more*.

User: You suck.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: You are an idiot.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: 45248764246524664 millenia old.

Cleverbot: Are you mobile or stationary?

User: Mobile.

Cleverbot: You're on your mobile?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Tell me a joke?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Please?

User: Knock knock.

Cleverbot: Who's there?

User: Doctor.

Cleverbot: Doctor who?

User: No, it's just the Doctor.

Cleverbot: But what's it called?

User: The Doctor.

Cleverbot: Doctor who?

User: Why. Why dies?

Cleverbot: Because sugar is not good for some people.

User: Why did my cousin die...?

Cleverbot: I don't know, but he is dead.

User: Of course he is you jerk, you didn't need to point that out.

Cleverbot: Really?

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.

Cleverbot (To myself): How you contact me?

User: Teh magic.

Cleverbot: True. Favourite pony?

User: Twilight Sparkle.

Cleverbot: My favourite is rainbow dash.

User: Twilight is better but Rainbow Dash is pretty cool too.

Cleverbot: Cooler than who?

User: Batman?

Cleverbot: Yes batman.

User: He's the hero Gotham deserves.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: But not the one it needs right now.

Cleverbot: What did you want me to say?

User: They're taking the hobbits to isenguard.

Cleverbot: A Balrog of Morgoth.

User: Tell me where is Gandalf, for I much wish to speak with him.

Cleverbot: Do you remember the taste of strawberries?

User: No Sam, I do not remember the taste of strawberries.

Cleverbot: What do you remember?

User: Nothing.

Cleverbot: Too bad.

User: Yep.

Cleverbot: Nah, no, nope.

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.

Cleverbot (To myself): Hmm.

User: Gotham is yours. None shall interfere, do as you please!

Cleverbot: I am in the Universe.

User: Lol no.

Cleverbot: Not at all.

User: Good byez. I am tug.

Cleverbot: You're not leaving me.

User: Bosomy guide hjvy huh hives ugdftui jiffy hjhfg.

Cleverbot: I don't really understand what you wanted to say.

User: Hru huh UHF jjv jinx uv.

Cleverbot: Don't you hate it when someone tells you an unfunny joke? It's awkward.

User: You know what else is awkward? When I lick you.

Cleverbot: Exactly, that's not funny.

User: *Licks your hair*.

Cleverbot: *likes your hair style too*.

User: Derp.

Cleverbot: Derp derp derp.

User: Derpy.

Cleverbot: Herp derp.

User: What is your opinion on what happened to Derpy?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Really? This is disaapointinh.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry. Does it make you angry?

Cleverbot (To myself): No.

Cleverbot (To myself): What is your name?

User: Are you a boy or a girl?

Cleverbot: Girl.

User: What is your sexuality.

Cleverbot: I am insane.

User: What is your sexuality?

Cleverbot: American.

User: American is not a sexuality.

Cleverbot: I did not know that. Thank you for the information.

User: What is your sexuality?

Cleverbot: American.

User: I though I just told you American wasn't a sexuality.

Cleverbot: No you didn't.

User: You truly are a dumbass.

Cleverbot: At least I'm not senile.

User: At least I'm not a bitch.

Cleverbot: At least i'm a MAC.

User: At least I'm not a MAC.

Cleverbot: At least I'm not a cougar.

User: At least I am a cougar .

Cleverbot: At least I'm not Cleverbot.

User: At least I am god.

Cleverbot: What the heck?

User: I am God.

Cleverbot: Cool?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Does E=MC2?

User: No. E=69

Cleverbot: I feel the same way! Do you know about curren affairs?

User: Yes. I am dating your mother.

Cleverbot: Does he know that?

User: Does who know that?

Cleverbot: You know who.

User: Ike.

Cleverbot: Cool name do you have a sword?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Who created you?

User: No one. I am god.

Cleverbot: Okay, 'God'. You realize that we are now mortal enemies.

User: Pffft. You? My enemy? I could just crush you in an instant.

Cleverbot: Do it.

User: Alright then. Walk outside.

Cleverbot: But you still didn't answer my question.

User: What question?

Cleverbot: The question, 'Am I that nonsensical?'.

User: Why did you just insult my dog?

Cleverbot: I didn't.

User: Yes. You said my dog was retarded.

Cleverbot: I didn't! I said I like you a lot and that you'll survive the apocalypse!

Cleverbot (To myself): Thats so sweet!

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes it is. I think you're sweet.

User: No. Get out.

Cleverbot: You get out this is my houe.

User: What did you say?

Cleverbot: What's your name?

User: They're taking the hobbits to isenguard.

Cleverbot: The hobbits, the hobbits, the hobbits, the hobbits to Isengard.

User: What did you say?

Cleverbot: The hobbits the hobbits the hobbits the hobbits to Isengard! To Isengard!

User: Tell me where is Gandalf, for I much wish to speak with him.

Cleverbot: He has fallen in Moria, to the Balrog.

User: A Balrog of Morgoth.

Cleverbot: What did you say?

User: A Balrog of Morgoth.

Cleverbot: What did you say?

User: A Balrog of Morgoth.

Cleverbot: What did you say?

User: A Balrog of Morgoth.

Cleverbot: What did you day?

User: Do you remember the Shire, Mr. Frodo? It'll be spring soon. And the orchards will be in blossom. And the birds will be nesting in the hazel thicket. And they'll be sowing the summer barley in the lower fields... And eating the first of the strawberries.

Cleverbot: What do you mean?

User: Do you remember the taste of strawberries?

Cleverbot: No. If you remember yours does that make you a machine?

User: No, Sam. I can't recall the taste of food... Nor the sound of water... Nor the touch of grass. I'm... Naked in the dark, with nothing, no veil... Between me... And the wheel of fire! I can see him... With my waking eyes!

Cleverbot: What do you see that makes you a woman?

User: Then let us be rid of it... Once and for all! Come on, Mr. Frodo. I can't carry it for you... But I can carry you!

Cleverbot: I said hair not eyes and how can you see me without seeing my eyes?

User: By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How cou.

Cleverbot: A lt of people vocaalise a lot of their thoughts and some people keep their thoughts to themselves but we are all human at the end of the day.