All Changelings must Return to the Hive, RIGHT now!

[Pharynx 35]

Do any of you realize how long I've been sitting here, biding my time? Do any of you realize how many frivolous events, redundant status updates and dead end topics I've been forced to endure, in the name of finding out what's really been going on with my hive as of late?

Don't answer that.

If you're a changeling, then you know why I'm here, and you'd better read on if you don't expect a scolding in person, later.

If you're not a changeling, please disregard this message, as it does not apply to you. 

If you are a changeling, metamorphised or otherwise, you are to get your shimmering tails off this site, and back home, at once.

What started as a benign hobby has grown out of control. Chores and duties around the hive are getting neglected left and right. Two days ago another surprise Maulwurf attack on our hive, and I barely had five warm bodies fighting with me. After investigating the matter, I've found that this place is to blame. This community, so saturated with positivity, has attracted changelings like moths to the flame. Worse still, it keeps them here, distracting them with commemorative badges and other useless trinkets, rewarding further engagement.

I've had it. A changelings' priorities start with their hive, not some frilly, online social community.

That is all. If you do not return home, or otherwise notify me of your intended return within two days, I will come and find you. Trust me, you do not want me to come and find you.

[Thorax 84]

P-Pharynx, you can't just post things like this in the Canterlot area, this is the staff update forum!

Also, since when has this been such an issue for you!? I thought you were fine with the community when I pointed it to you, after I discovered it!

[Derplight Sperkle 1,017]

The hive hasn’t been my home in so long. Couch is much better 

[BornAgainBrony 2,398]

Hey guys! What's going on in this thre.....

 

Ooooooookaaaaaayyyy... what'd we miss?

[Evilshy 5,093]

What if I'm a changeling but I don't know it?

[Pharynx 35]

12 minutes ago, Thorax said:

P-Pharynx, you can't just post things like this in the Canterlot area, this is the staff update forum!

Also, since when has this been such an issue for you!? I thought you were fine with the community when I pointed it to you, after I discovered it!

Don't you sit there, trying to wash your hooves clean, Thorax, you made the situation worse when you then told not just me, but the entire hive about your little discovery.

Behold, fillies and colts,

On 8/15/2019 at 3:00 PM, Thorax said:

Oh, this is just wonderful! I can't wait to show the other changelings these new badges, what a kind, thoughtful representation of our new way of life in the hive!

Thanks, Jeric!

Someone then thought it'd be a good idea to have a hive meeting about this place, a hive meeting, Thorax.

9 minutes ago, Derplight Sperkle said:

The hive hasn’t been my home in so long. Couch is much better 

Your situation has been approved previously, Derplight. I don't clump you into the same category as my brother and the others.

[BornAgainBrony 2,398]

1 minute ago, Pharynx said:

" I can't wait to show the other changelings these new badges, "

Hey, Pharynx... you know what some other military units around the land do to reward good service?

Badges.

[NavelColt 22,884]

If I make this an announcement, shall I be spared your wrath, co-sire? 

[Thorax 84]

1 hour ago, Derplight Sperkle said:

The hive hasn’t been my home in so long. Couch is much better 

Hello, Derplight! We still miss you at the hive! The nymphs always love to play on your couch whenever you visit! 

1 hour ago, Pharynx said:

Don't you sit there, trying to wash your hooves clean, Thorax, you made the situation worse when you then told not just me, but the entire hive about your little discovery.

Behold, fillies and colts,

Someone then thought it'd be a good idea to have a hive meeting about this place, a hive meeting, Thorax.

I mentioned it because the changelings need hobbies, too, Pharynx! The days of us working to exhaustion left us with Chrysalis. Now we have the opportunity to explore ourselves, and discover new things that we like, and want to try. I understand a few chores may be behind, but I don't think that warrants an emergency hive return protocol. 

[Chrysalis 93]

48 minutes ago, Pharynx said:

If you are a changeling, metamorphised or otherwise, you are to get your shimmering tails off this site, and back home, at once.

 

14 minutes ago, Thorax said:

The days of us working to exhaustion left us with Chrysalis.

Don't suppose this means you boys need little old me back, do you? Sounds like the leadership around my hive leaves something to be desired, as of late~

[Sparklefan1234 189,167]

Didn't the Changelings leave a few days ago? 

[Quinch 1,184]

1 minute ago, Chrysalis said:

 

Don't suppose this means you boys need little old me back, do you? Sounds like the leadership around my hive leaves something to be desired, as of late~ 

Yeah, they could really use a reformed changeling queen, rather than just a king. Are you volunteering? Just think of the wonderful changes you'll experience!

[NavelColt 22,884]

Just now, Sparklefan1234 said:

Didn't the Changelings leave a few days ago? 

If you're referring to badges, I believe Jeric is just auto-changing everyone to each new badge for a few days as they come out. 

[Sparklefan1234 189,167]

Just now, ~C. Discord~ said:

If you're referring to badges, I believe Jeric is just auto-changing everyone to each new badge for a few days as they come out. 

 

Well, I guess I'll get back to swatting Changelings.

 

[Pharynx 35]

12 minutes ago, Chrysalis said:

Don't suppose this means you boys need little old me back, do you? Sounds like the leadership around my hive leaves something to be desired, as of late~

 

9 minutes ago, Quinch said:

Yeah, they could really use a reformed changeling queen, rather than just a king. Are you volunteering? Just think of the wonderful changes you'll experience!

Sorry, but now that I'm helping out, we have no use for a witch. Thorax may lack backbone, but with me around the hive has gotten back into shape. This is just a minor setback.

28 minutes ago, Thorax said:

I mentioned it because the changelings need hobbies, too, Pharynx! The days of us working to exhaustion left us with Chrysalis. Now we have the opportunity to explore ourselves, and discover new tings that we like, and want to try. I understand a few chores may be behind, but I don't think that warrants an emergency hive return protocol. 

You're too sentimental, Thorax. First you introduce hugging as an actual policy for restoring stamina and energy among the hive drones during work shifts, then you allow changelings to take constant naps together in groups to achieve the same thing, and now you're trying to argue for their continued slack? There's having hobbies and then there's shirking responsibility.

I'll say again, I give it two days. I expect the hive fuller than I've seen it in weeks, and for chores to start getting done.

[Quinch 1,184]

2 minutes ago, Pharynx said:

Sorry, but now that I'm around, we have no use for a witch. Thorax may lack backbone, but with me around the hive has gotten back into shape. This is just a minor setback.

Gotten back into shape, you say?

See what you did there. And some creatures say you have no sense of humor.

[Cash In 23,502]

Oh dear. This seems like a commotion.

[Thorax 84]

Yeah, that's right. I know how to use memes, now. There's a website that adds captions!

He's always so brash...

Um, if anyling is reading this, don't worry about it so much for now. If everyling could maybe just let us know that they're still here, and wouldn't mind checking in with Pharynx at the hive, that should be a good first step. I'll follow up with Pharynx, and we'll get things sorted, one way or the other.

[DivineDefender1000 71,437]

I am loyal only to @Chrysalis! I only do as she commands!

[Dark Horse 12,976]

"Return to the hive"? Dear Pharynx... these forums ARE a hive!

A few buggo emotes and it'll be like a home away from home for you and Thorax.

Maybe.

[Prospekt 11,040]

@Pharynx Now, now.   Relax, General, really! Everycreature is welcome here, just like at Princess @Twilight Sparkle's School Of Friendship.  And Changelings need a place to relax every once in a while.

If you need any help finding changelings who might still be hanging around here, we would be happy to politely remind them to check in with you. 

 

[Dark Qiviut 22,681]

@Pharynx I see this new ranking made you a little bugged out.  

[Quinch 1,184]

8 minutes ago, Dark Horse said:

"Return to the hive"? Dear Pharynx... these forums ARE a hive!

One might even call them a hive of fun and philantrophy.

2 minutes ago, Dark Qiviut said:

@Pharynx I see this new ranking made you a little bugged out.  

C'mon, going for jokes this easy is practically chitin.

[Dark Qiviut 22,681]

3 minutes ago, Quinch said:

C'mon, going for jokes this easy is practically chitin.

I don’t know. Ever since he reformed himself, he’s become a shell of himself.

[TBD 17,276]

1 hour ago, Pharynx said:

After investigating the matter, I've found that this place is to blame. This community, so saturated with positivity, has attracted changelings like moths to the flame.

Changling from Hive 22665 reporting to duty SIR! It may seems I may have found the problem...it has come to my attention that @DivineSoul1000 has started this little pizza, chocolate h, hearts and hugs hand out all over at the game forum. This *munching on chocolate* may be the reason of this issue. *munching some more chocolate*. I believe we should take this action  seriously to avoid any intruder to the hive SIR! *although hugs would be nice right about now and more chocolates* 

Oh, and another major issues to address....THERE'S COLD SOUP. i REPEAT, COLD SOUP. This soup ain't gonna warm itself you know?