Fluttershy4life

Thank you, I will keep that in mind I really appreciate the support. I am always here for you if you need someone to talk too. I may not be much help, but hey I'll try my best for you.

Thank you so much I'm glad to hear that you can relate, and I hope all the best for everything you're going through. Even though I may not be completely stable, I'm always here if you need somebody! It sounds pretty harsh what you have, my psych said I am lucky to have reactive depression because unlike a lot of people with depression I actually get to feel happiness, but it's a curse because when you crash it is brutal. Depression is a horrible demon, I hope both of us one day can get rid of it

ARM YOURSELF BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE HERE WILL SAVE YOUUUU Yeah, I am kind of a fanatic of the music used in the James Bond movies (Quantum of Solace's theme was horrible...but the rejected them was amazing just saying.) Plus James Bond is kind of a hottie...I don't know what it is about a guy with a gun... So anyways...my life.. It seems like every night, I have some sort of mental breakdown or I'm on the top of the world. It's what reactive depression is all about, ups and downs. I am too much for a lot of people to handle. even my parents don't understand me, or my math teacher. On the ADD questionnaire he had to fill out for me he said yes to "mood changes quickly or drastically" Which is very true, I don't even know how it goes. It usually happens when I think. My mind tells me great things that work me up than there is always some sort of demon that pushes me back down so within two minutes even without anything happening at all I can become a total happy go lucky freak to a complete emo monotone person. at home i'm usually pretty monotone for a lot of things, which at school I am nothing at all like. To be honest, I'm nothing but a train wreck. I don't understand myself at all, and I'm still trying to discover who I am. To be honest I don't know who I am. am i this happy go lucky human being? Or am I the quiet, i don't care, everything sucks human? Or am i the overemotional everything is against me let's spam text my ex boyfriend girl? I don't know who I am. None of them seem like me. The only time I really do feel like me is when I'm well dancing, but that's only because I get to escape who I am for just a little bit. All of the things that are eating me away inside are gone, all the people that are driving me to the point of breaking (one psych i've had said I am very passionate, but another says I am very resentful..logic.), any sort of drama, anything at all that may be bugging me is gone. I become a character. Someone who is mentally stable sometimes, sometimes I become someone who is completely back-crack crazy (one dance I made to the song Paper Heart is about being heart broken to the point they are in the asylum, I actually have a lot of fun with that one. Another to the song Killing Time is about woman accidentally killing her husband) no matter who I act as none of them are me. I have never acted as myself in any of my dances but that is the best part. I'm not me anymore, and it feels amazing. Lastly, I am allowing one human being control my life, someone I cared way to much for and somewhere in my head I thought he would always be there but he wasn't. and now he is the demon in my head breaking my down. He is everything still too me. And I know that it is killing me. I have a bad feeling I won't make it past this year, and it disappoints me greatly that I became such a wuss where I am allowing one human. One. Single. Human. Being. Control everything I am. Allowing him to decide whether or not I live, but it's not really that way anymore. I am getting almost physically sick from this. It's horrible. It's painful. yet I don't mind dying at all. I am sick of waiting for things to get better, and waiting for me to discover myself I have tried so hard. Too hard. ......Great way to start my new blog on here. But i guess it was the purpose I made this blog. To rant.

Wut? HOW????? O.o Guys are so much more calm than girls! I say guys get it better in general when it comes to these certain things girls deal with 1. periods. 2. pregnancy. 3. being objectified

That is such a hard question because I love so many instruments! But even though it's pretty generic, I adore the piano. I think it has a beautiful sound when it's played right, and the best part is when played with both hands the sound is so full. There is nothing missing in it, it sounds like perfection.

-I don't think talent exists, people are good at things because they work at them. Not because some sort of magical thing they are born with. -The second season of My Little Pony was the best, the first season was okay, it had a few good episodes. Season 3 has sucked, and I think they should end the show before it's so bad that we all just want it put out of it's misery -As much as I love Fluttershy, I think Applejack is the cutest character on the show -I hate that the moment I told a few of my friends that I started playing world of tanks they think I'm a gamer. No, I play one game. Only when I'm bored. Not every single day. I may try other ones, but I will never call myself a gamer, and nor do I plan to become one. If anything it will become a side hobby. -I thought Cupcakes was an amazing fanfiction, I love grimdark. -I hate it when people say that EVERYTHING that is played on the radio is bad, not everything is bad, okay A LOT of it is brutal but there is always some diamonds in the rough -I think most people today are all trying to be so unique, they all end up acting exactly the same. -The concept of dying scares and thrills me at the same time. -I actually don't really hate any types of music, because well I don't care about the genre. Music is music no matter what. -I am bloody sick of love songs.

I'm working that day, then buying myself some discounting valentine's day chocolate, curling up to my computer watching my favorite TV shows and such and crying. LOL jk I don't care that i'm single. I'm just gonna buy some discounted chocolate, and seize the day. It's just a normal day for me.

I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU Seriously that is flipping amazing, I can't even describe it. That is bucking awesomeeeee I really wish someone would make a fan video to that song featuring Big Mac as him!

Hmmm..I have a huge book collection, I also collect Tetley tea figurines whenever I go to antique malls (which is a lot) and I have taken over my Mom's stamp collection. My favorite one is the one we got for the 100th anniversary of the Titanic's sinking

I've seen a lot of movies based off historical events, and you probably should know when it comes to history and movies I kind of go insane about accuracy! It seems like a lot of the main plots of what happened usually are correct but some things aren't always accurate or certain details just get on my nerves. Like a lot of movies about the last imperial family of russia they make the 4 princesses have zero personality when each girl was very complex and real in their own ways. If you are looking for something that'd teach you the outer picture of what happened then I'd say yes, historical movies do help. As for details and stuff, I recommend hitting the books

Uhhhh a lot of things I probably shouldn't uh mention on a public website......just because i could get in a lot of trouble.... If it was my choice I would go back to the 90's as a male and sing in a grunge band......yeah...it's a bit odd....

For me, the day I will truly be happy will be the day I finally harden over and stop caring so much about everything! If I just stopped giving a buck, i'm sure life would be a lot more smooth. But until then... 1. Reading 2. Seeing my friends, the ones who make me feel loved and appreciated. 3. Writing 4. Dancing, i love taking on the roles of other characters and escaping my life and living another one 5. History, seriously it's pathetic how excited i get during history class 6. My family, even tho we're at each other's wits a lot, i love my family they mean the universe to me 7. Music 8. Helping out other people (cliche yes I know, and cheesy but I love helping others)

I actually don't mind mondays, it's tuesdays that i truly hate! I don't know why, but it always feels like tuesdays always suck. Like today was a horrible day, yesterday was actually quite decent.

I usually find myself to start singing out loud whatever song is stuck in my head, or randomly quoting it. It happens probably a billion times a day. Yesterday I drove my friends insane singing "WHY CANT WE BE FRIENDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS"

As much as I hate to say it, two of the My Little Pony characters suit me. Pinkie Pie- There are two sides of me, one side is extremely happy, joyful and want nothing but happiness. I love candy and sweets and usually extremely hyper and giggly, at times I can be extremely annoying! The other side of me is very depressed, not trusting, and won't listen to anyone's words. Twilight Sparkle- I'm a nerd, and extremely proud of it. I love reading, I love learning new things and I adore libraries. It depresses me greatly that the book industry is going down, and that the number of people who adore reading as a hobby is extremely low. I am also extremely close friends with my big brother, he is my best friend for life even though he's moved out and I don't see him much anymore. And there is one other character from an anime called Girls und Panzer named Yukari Akiyama. I can be shy when I first meet you just like her but when I'm around or doing something that I feel passionately about my true colours come out. Also in grade 5 I didn't have much friends and my books and the Titanic seemed very much like my only friends, very much like Yukari when she was younger, tanks were her only friends.

I love Disney movies! My favorite classic ones -Mulan -Dumbo -Anything from the Winnie the Pooh series My favorite Pixar ones -Finding Nemo -Up -Toy Story 3