The Confidence Thread

[~Master~ Button Mash 2,307]

I'll use an example. Last June I was very much into art. I was trying desperately to improve my work and get better so I could become at least somewhat successful as an artist. The whole time I was stressed out by my inadequacy. Now that I've given up, I feel better about myself

Maybe it just wasn't for you then. Everyone has something. A skill. They just need to discover it.

 

Either that or your confidence is derived from something else. YMMV.

 

But if we want to have fruitful lives, we NEED confidence. So lets work together everyone!

Edited November 20, 2013 by ~Master~ Button Mash

[Twila Starshimmer 172]

After being bullied and judged for most of my life (age 23 now), my self-esteem and confidence has plummeted so far down, I don't know what it even looks like.

 

I've found that when I drink alcohol, all my anxieties wash away and I act how I'd be without those stupid anxieties--only a select few ever see me that way normally.

 

But, alcohol is NOT the solution by any means, so I guess I'll just have to look into anxiety meds or something. 

 

I am learning, though, to have more of an optimistic outlook on life, being depressed does nothing but harm for all aspects of myself. 

[catnet 9,353]

Speaking as someone who was timid as hell two years ago, I think expanding one's comfort zone into the least intimidating area nearby, then the next, then the next, can do a lot of good raising one's confidence. Because if you aim straight for the end goal without tackling the little steps along the way, it can be a lot harder to feel motivated for it or know what to do, y'know? It's like opposing a game's final boss minutes into playing, of course some people can pull it off somehow, but it's more likely you'll get scared off and never want to attempt it again.

 

For me, having confidence talking to people in real life is my final boss in a sense; I've still got room for improvement with it for sure, but by talking to people online these last two years- online being an amazing environment for me, as one where it's much easier to find friendly people with shared interests, without having to worry about seeing their faces (probably the scariest part of conversations to me x.x) and where I can take my time thinking of what to say- I feel I've somehow developed my social skills and become confident enough in them that I can be more competent at real life conversations, and have less to worry about tackling now that I've dealt with some of the big things such as starting a conversation, having the confidence to add more to them than just simple agreements, being assertive when I don't like how something is going, etc.

 

Small steps make a big difference in the end, so don't stress yourself out if leaping straight for the goal seems impossible. Rome wasn't built in a day after all, but you can still get there all the same in time if you keep on building at a steady pace

[Lucky Bolt 34,914]

Eh, I can be a little bit TOO confident at times.  Full of myself, even. Oh well, still better than having zero confidence/self-esteem at all I guess. 

[TBD 17,228]

I’m the kind who move on with their head held high when things doesn’t go the way I wanted without making it like “ oh shit I fucked up.”

[Partialgeek514 4,920]

I've never been all that confident.  Though, I have been able to grow my self-esteem a bit over the past few years. I still avoid arguing/disagreements at almost any cost though...  I'll state my opinion, and then hope I'm ignored. 

[Early Sunsets 2,106]

The forums have helped me a little bit, and I've been hoping I could boost my confidence and comfort in social situation by going to conventions, but every time I made plans to go to one something popped up last minute. I guess we'll see if that'll help when I eventually make a plan for a con that doesn't fall through.

[Dreambiscuit 8,024]

I can be over-confident at times, and I've allowed it to go to my head from time to time (okay, a lot), but I try to keep it real and recognize that it's not all me, and that i couldn't do it without the help of others. 

At least that's what I'm going to say here so i don't sound like an egotist. 

But seriously, I do get a lot of props, and that does help. 

[Kyoshi Frost Wolf 40,291]

I have absolutely no confidence in myself. Unless me being confident that I will fail at almost anything counts. It has been this way for over a decade for me and it has never gotten truly better.

[Mirage 24,137]

It depends. I'm a rather neutral personality recovering from mild negativity and depression. Sometimes all it takes is one bad experience and you're tempted to believe just about everything else in life will be bad too.

But I've learned that it's better to suffer from taking risks and being bold, rather than sinking into a state of defeat where suffering is all you can experience. At least if you try, you will have some good things happen!

[Clawdeen 12,110]

I’ve been trying to embody the confidence of Regina George and Sharpay Evans. Fake it till you make it

[Sparklefan1234 161,874]

I don't have a lot of confidence in myself when I post my artwork to DeviantArt.

Luckily, I have all of you here who support me and I'm eternally grateful for that. 

Edited July 10, 2022 by Sparklefan1234

[EpicEnergy 22,082]

I have no confidence in myself, and I can't seem to find anything that would help me boost my self-confidence. That's the least of my troubles though, as I suffer from depression, which is a much more severe issue than lacking self-confidence.

[Ice Princess Silky 10,821]

It really depends. When I'm around good friends and we have a friendly competition, I'm beyond confident... Cocky, even. 

But I'm actually super shy on the inside and only act that way out of our dynamic, comfort and trust. 

I'm super confident with things I am familiar or skilled with. But with everything else, shyness is my default. 

On 2022-07-10 at 12:26 AM, Sparklefan1234 said:

I don't have a lot of confidence in myself when I post my artwork to DeviantArt.

Luckily, I have all of you here who support me and I'm eternally grateful for that. 

Are you kidding me?! Your artwork and banners are outstanding!

[Magic Note 2,738]

Honestly, I don't have much confidence in myself. I always get nervous at the last second.

[Ice Princess Silky 10,821]

20 minutes ago, Magic Note said:

Honestly, I don't have much confidence in myself. I always get nervous at the last second.

Well, I'll always believe in you. 

[Clawdeen 12,110]

I like the thought behind this thread. A shame it didn’t grow into something bigger.

I’m hesitant to talk too much on my own confidence issues out of fear of potentially ruining months of progress.

That being said though I’ll gladly share some of what I do.

The biggest thing that’s helped me is downloading an app that lets you record your voice and replay what you say. I repeat a couple affirmations and record it. Then I play it back and repeat it along with myself. The app I use lets me loop it so it’s pretty great. I’ll do it when I’m exercising or something else.

I also listen to a few affirmation videos on YouTube as well.

The biggest and hardest thing is keeping my thoughts in line and not spiraling back into a depression. Like I took this class tonight at work and due to not having anyone to talk to I had thoughts like nobody likes me. That sort of thing. But I caught it and refused to feed into it. Before I would do that and mentally I’d be in a bad spot fast. I’ve been trying to be mindful on what thoughts I pay attention to for that reason. Just one bad thought can lead me to have a panic attack if I pay too much attention to it. And I’m tired of dealing with those.

 

[ExplosionMare 18,007]

Confidence has been something I've struggled a lot with over the years. It's funny, because as a kid I had the mentality that I could do anything and was invincible, in a sense. Somewhere down the line, life got crazy and pressured, and I got it into my head that I could live without confidence. Big mistake, because if you don't do anything with confidence, how would you know the difference between success and failure? Short answer is, you don't, you just think everything you do is a failure.

I've accepted that I'm always going to struggle with confidence, especially during bad days. It happens, but confidence can go back up just as it can go back down. I've learned not to think about failure as a life or death situation, so at the very least, I know I won't fall for that sort of thing again.

[Flying Pencil 3,023]

I lack confidence. When I was young, I thought I would be a risk taker and confident. But I am the opposite. I don't take risks, I fear failure, I have zero self-esteem, and I am a crazy perfectionist.

My struggles with depression also makes me lack confidence. I've been trying to improve my confidence and although I'm no longer a crazy perfectionist and I've learned to accept failure.

I'm still struggling to gain more confidence because of my zero self-esteem.