Bullying: Experiences and How to Deal With It

[Dr_Waveband 745]

When I was younger I was often bullied in school for being different and for having few (or no) friends. I know how horrible it can feel, and I could have used some support and advice back then. People don't always seek help when they're bullied, simply trying to ignore it, even when they're hurt by it. I feel that a discussion of this topic could prove both interesting and helpful.So, share your experiences and thoughts. Have you been bullied? Have you been a bully? What do you think one could do in such a situation?

Edited March 10, 2013 by Artemis
added tags

[Retro*Derpy 3,081]

I have been bullied before, and it was for no real reason, He was just a...bad person... and it was like 7 years ago But the problem got solved.

Edited September 29, 2012 by Bobthecableman

[termenchecks 146]

well i went trough a lot of pretty hard bullying over 8th grade (yes even physical violence) beacouse i came out as bisexual. i dont blame them though, i live in the country and people are retarded, scared and close minded around here. so they probably thought/think i'm one of those pink stereotypes when i actually consider myself more manly than the rest of them.

i still get a little bullied. people look all the same and have the same interests as EVERYONE else and shit like that (probably beacouse their scared) and i think i'm the only one (with a couple of friends) who have my own opinions about things and is beeing myself a hundred procent. so they think of me as a fucking freak.

worst thing is. i dont do anything about it.

 

edit: 8th grade in norway is 9th grade for you americans

 

maybe that's the roots for my depression?

Edited August 16, 2012 by anonymstol

[Ad Foedera Cresco 188]

I've used to be bullied when I was in the 4th and 5th grade a lot. Mostly because I was hyper-active and annoying honestly. When people teased me I just ignored them and it's literally like their not even there! it sounds cheesy but it's true,. After the first few seconds everything's back to normal, and don't let what they say dwell into your mind.

 

I havn't been bullied or teased since I've went to the 6th grade. It's hard to explain and weird to say, but I did learn from my mistakes which got me bullied. I didn't "change how I am", but I improved myself onto a better foundation of who I already am. In other words, I got a better and more suitable sense of comedy, I learned when not to by hyper and when to be, I learned that I should'nt suddenly go off topic with something they're completely unfamiliar with randomly, and i learned that if you're in a conversation with a group of people, and you're not too bright on the current topic that you don't have to talk as much as the person next you you, but say a sentence or two giving your own neutral/positive thoughts on the situation. Not something that'll make em' go butt hurt, but something they could be fine with or agree with.

 

I hope I wasn't getting off topic, but that's what i've learned on how to not be bullied.

 

Ohyeah, this may not be for everyone, but WORKOUT. I'm not even joking, people won't bully you if you look like a football player . I used to work out, but I honestly don't need to, genetics. so basically it's just muscle mass for me(not bragging).

If you really nead to, workout if there's a possibility of people wanting to pick a fight with you, but if there isn't you could still work out. I honestly stick with bieng fun and more of a class clown. Bieng funny gets EVERYPONY on your side, even the bullies! sounds ironic but it's true, and it's pretty fun too .

 

well i went trough a lot of pretty hard bullying over 8th grade (yes even physical violence) beacouse i came out as bisexual. i dont blame them though, i live in the country and people are retarded, scared and close minded around here. so they probably thought/think i'm one of those pink stereotypes when i actually consider myself more manly than the rest of them.

i still get a little bullied. people look all the same and have the same interests as EVERYONE else and shit like that (probably beacouse their scared) and i think i'm the only one (with a couple of friends) who have my own opinions about things and is beeing myself a hundred procent. so they think of me as a fucking freak.

worst thing is. i dont do anything about it.

 

I really wouldn't give a flying Buck what people near you think because you live under the Bible belt! I live here too right now also, I've seen what the "other" people's reputations are like here. It's sickening.

[Vicke 3,187]

Hmm, i can think of one thing.

I was bullied in school a few years back. And there was this typical brat who said things such as ''Shreck'' or ogre.

And when i was walking with some of my friends he said ''Why are you walking with him, you are cool and should hang with us''

I snapped, i took his head and bashed it into the cabinets. He ran like little baby man and i ran after xP

 

He took cover behind a teacher but i diden't give a crap, i reached him and held him down while the teacher was trying to get me off him, i then told him if he would ever say anything to me ever again, i would break him.

And thats how it ended.

[Dr_Waveband 745]

I can't agree with replying to bullying with physical violence, really. Seems excessive.

 

When people teased me I just ignored them and it's literally like their not even there! it sounds cheesy but it's true,.

That's the best answer, though it only works with casual teasing.

 

I havn't been bullied or teased since I've went to the 6th grade. It's hard to explain and weird to say, but I did learn from my mistakes which got me bullied. I didn't "change how I am", but I improved myself onto a better foundation of who I already am.

That's what largely resolved the problem for me, too. I grew up and learned to deal with it.

 

I hope I wasn't getting off topic, but that's what i've learned on how to not be bullied.

That was as on-topic as it gets!

 

 

To anonymstol: I'm thankful, as bisexual and otherwise pretty deviant, that I don't live in a place like that. I feel for you.

[Chigens and Kay 3,831]

Me and my brothers were bullied throughout school. People would pick on us for no reason. I really don't want to share my experiences, kinda' personal, bad memories...

 

Eventually it got so bad that the police had to get involved and they were more than happy to go and arrest the bullies and told us to call them if there were ever a problem again.

 

Police absolutely HATE bullying, so I would suggest calling them first-off. Don't be afraid of repercussions from the bullies, they are afraid of police.

[Ad Foedera Cresco 188]

Hmm, i can think of one thing.

I was bullied in school a few years back. And there was this typical brat who said things such as ''Shreck'' or ogre.

And when i was walking with some of my friends he said ''Why are you walking with him, you are cool and should hang with us''

I snapped, i took his head and bashed it into the cabinets. He ran like little baby man and i ran after xP

 

He took cover behind a teacher but i diden't give a crap, i reached him and held him down while the teacher was trying to get me off him, i then told him if he would ever say anything to me ever again, i would break him.

And thats how it ended.

 

I shouldn't promote violence but, You go dude! XD That's a pretty awesome of a story, I wonder if he ever saw you again and just gave you like, 10 bucks and power-walked away

 

"other"? oh yeah. he's different!!! lets get him!!

 

(additional characters additional characters additional characters)

 

Let's beat him down while we make un-related racials slurs we usually say to black people!!!

 

Pretty much yeah.

[Vicke 3,187]

I shouldn't promote violence but, You go dude! XD That's a pretty awesome of a story, I wonder if he ever saw you again and just gave you like, 10 bucks and power-walked away

 

Afterwords people thought we were going to fight, even himself. So he ran outside [because i was going towards him].

He then got cornerd and a lot of people made a ring, with me and him in the middle.

 

I had no reason to hurt him so what i did was i stretched out my hand while looking in his eyes.

We ended up shaking hands and i got praised by the teachers and the admins of the school.

[notdog1996 315]

The only time I remember being really bullied was two years ago in Secondary 2 (No idea what is the equivalent in USA, maybe grade 8th?). Our school is badly designed, which causes our lockers halls to be really tightened. That means there can only be 3 persons for the width of the hall. But, we're 2500 at school, divide that by 15 and you get 166 persons who try to get to their locker at the exact same time. There's one person at each side of the hall since they're in front of their locker which means that there's only place for one other person at time. However, there was that girl who always pushed everyone in their lockers to pass. One day, I was trying to get to my locker and she was walking in the other direction. She bumped me like if I she could pass through me . What did she want me to do? Get all the way back just to let her pass while she could have just wait 2 seconds to let me get where I wanted to go? I bumped back and manage to pass. The day after, she came to talk to me at me locker and asked if I had a problem with her. I said no. The day after she leaned against my locker while I was in a hurry to get to my lesson. I just grabbed my padlock and hurried up. She then started to talk trash about me and blah blah blah. I tried to ignore her but she bumped me. I bumped her again . Then she started to laugh at me and everything and then I lost it. I smashed her head as hard as I could with my hand. I didn't hit her anymore after that, I was too pissed off. She hit me but I couldn't feel it, I was too mad. She couldn't really hurt me since she was weak, I was wearing my coat and my hair is short. When everything was done I was so pissed that I reported her to the school security and got to my course right after. They called me back and we both got a detention, though SHE already go TONS of detentions so it meant nothing to her. To me it was like the end of the world. I could be considered a nerd and the humiliation was when I had to talk to each of my teachers and tell them that they needed to give me work to do for my detention. They couldn't believe it! I couldn't either. It lasted two days, to me those two days were hell. I even lost marks in French because we had an exam and the school staff lost it! (At our school, when you're in detention you still have to do exams but it the job of the school staff to deliver it to the teacher, in which case it was never done.) She still continued to call me names when I got back to school. I told the director after and she never bothered me again. (The director said that if she continued to be such a jerk, she would change school, the one where all the jerks goes.) Needless to say that I hated it.

 

Now, if I saw ANYBODY bully someone, I would make sure the school security goes on their back .

[Unexard 50]

Jump on them and bite them in the throat. You either badly hurt him and he get scared or you surprise him enough to make you look crazy and get him away from you.

 

Did that at 10 years old, nobody ever messed with me since.

[FordFan99 9]

I've been bullied before. Mostly for my love of theatre. I've been lucky to have friends who look out for me and make sure people stop messing with me. I've not had any issues lately but my friends help a lot.

[Dice The Titanic Brony 68]

Im a veteran of bullying myself.

Mostly for being the new kid this year.

It stopped after a while but it still leaves its scars.

Even being ignored Hurts in a way.

 

Its important to remember that School isnt the rest of your life.

I got 1 year after this and im Free so to speak.

Just keep your friends close and Keep moving forward.

[hana 217]

i was bullied the whole time at elementary school, most of the time at middle school

at first grade i was new in the area, so i didnt knew no one, i had problem at talking and i was to shy to meet new friends. i was bullied

that went that way till i finished elementary school (i had 2 friends, not at the same time, one of them moved to some city)

in middle school i was wierd and such, i was bullied, at some point in seventh grade someone really got on my nerves while i was drawin (the class was cancelled, i was drawing on my table, and he came, sat in front of me, and insulted me for about 15 minutes, then he destroyed what i was drawing), after he ruined my draw i started hitting him, in the end 3 people seperated us while i hold him against the wall with his hair, he decided to do a hair cat after it... it was really reliefing, i felt so good after that (kick the fudge out of someone after 6 and a hulf years of being bullied), he stopped bullying me (that moment i was glad my parents sant me to learn martial arts)

2 years after i had something familiar, but this time he went away cose class started, he had his hand parlyzed for about an hour

since then im not really bullied ^^;

and i started taking care on how i act, and now im sorta popular (its complicated, i dont sure how to define it)

no one bullied me for 2 years i think :3

[Dusty Soul 2,611]

I got bullied alot in elementary and middle school. I was repeatedly called names. I was pushed into lockers. I was once put into a choke hold and then brought to the ground. I usually try to ignore it. I try to see the good in everyone. I give everyone more chances then they deserve. It hurt, but it made me tougher. I tried telling an adult, but honestly they didn't do anything. I decided to take matters into my own hands. I finally had enough when someone came up to me and called me a fat-ass at a football game. I ran over and tackled him to the ground. They've stopped bothering me now.

[Evilshy 5,089]

Vicke is now quite possibly the most badass member of the forum. Just sayin'.

 

 

Anyway, At the beginning of school years, I'd often get bullied a bit. However, my ability to give absolutely no fucks seems to be much greater than most people's because I literally ignored my way out of being bullied every year (well, until sophomore year of high school and we moved to a smallish town with a much better school system and exponentially less dickwads). People would talk shit, and I'd just turn my give-a-fuck-o-meter down to 0 and carry on with whatever I was doing.

Sometimes I'd turn it down into the negatives and start agreeing with the bullies. Laughing with them at myself, cracking jokes, stuff like that. It generally caught them off guard, and they'd stop because they would eventually figure out I was making them look like morons

[Retden 19]

I've never got bullied before. People get on well with others so there's no bullying.

But there's "gang". If you don't get involved, you're fine.

Those gangs are usually formed of highest class bullies, which fights other schools' "gang". Strange, huh?

[Lex 33]

Bullying among girls is totally different. When girls bully, they use tactics like turning your friends against you and spreading rumours to bring you down. It's all about mental manipulation. Last year an incident went on between me and my 'best friend' which left me shattered. She spread lies about me, turned some of my other best friends against me, and I spent the whole summer alone because no one believed that I hadn't done what she said I had done. I've since left that group of friends and become friends with another group of people who are 100x better than my old friends were. My ex-boyfriend also bullied me for a while as well because he was spiteful that I dumped him, but that doesn't affect me because I know he's a fucktard and everything he says is untrue.

[Mushy Giant Friend 206]

I haven't been bullied myself, but one of my closest friends (not close any more) started to bully my best friend. It started off with general teasing, but then it went on to full on bullying. I noticed it after about two months of teasing, and then her taking the victim's pencil cases and cardigans and hiding them somewhere. I tried to tell her she was being bullied, but she just said "no, it's all a good laugh...".

After a while, the bully started to do it in the middle of lessons as well, sneakily so the teacher couldn't see. That's when I told the bully to quit it, because even though the victim is putting on a brave face, she has been really upset (I had asked her about it again after a few days). The bully just continued so I told, and the bully had to be counselled. Never be afraid to tell if someone's bullying you.

[Phoenix Dirac Wright 121]

A quite simple yet harsh way to get rid of bullies is when they're bugging you, just say "Fuck you" and be off your way. It's surprisingly simple, yet effective in my place in school since I've reached the age of 13.

 

But in the past, if they had annoyed me a lot, I just had to keep staring at them till they hit me then I would have a reason to report it to a teacher or something of the sort. Quite funny in a way how they would explain why they hit me.

[notdog1996 315]

Bullying among girls is totally different. When girls bully, they use tactics like turning your friends against you and spreading rumours to bring you down. It's all about mental manipulation. Last year an incident went on between me and my 'best friend' which left me shattered. She spread lies about me, turned some of my other best friends against me, and I spent the whole summer alone because no one believed that I hadn't done what she said I had done. I've since left that group of friends and become friends with another group of people who are 100x better than my old friends were. My ex-boyfriend also bullied me for a while as well because he was spiteful that I dumped him, but that doesn't affect me because I know he's a fucktard and everything he says is untrue.

 

^^This

 

Seriously people often forget that girls's way of bullying can be worse than the guy's way. Boy's may hurt physically but girls will try to destroy you mentally and that can leave a huge scar. Sometimes they try to be your friend to back-stab you after and hurt you more. Seriously, I had a friend who tried to destroy me mentally and even if that happened months ago, I still think about it.

 

Be cautious with your friends you never know who really is one...

[Ink 191]

I'm bullied pretty severely every single day - however, I don't understand why everyone seems to think it's a horrible experience. I just find it sad that someone has use others for their own entertainment. People who bully can say or do whatever they want to me, it's below my dignity to pay them the slightest attention. I ignore them 100%, don't even look in their direction, and they realize they're not going to affect me. Heard of the term "don't feed the trolls"? It applies in reality, too.

Edited August 17, 2012 by Shaoni

[Tuxedo Kamen! 114]

Don't think me insensitive.

 

I used to be constantly bullied.

There is a part of me that thinks that this is normal, even a rite of passage to adulthood. I think kids these day's have gone soft. Names and small fights are just something you get through to finish school in general. I never had anything to report or fights that I had to explain. When death threats came up, I got serious about it, and sent a few kids and a parent to the ER.

 

I don't know your experience though. So tolerate what you can, but when you cant take it anymore DO SOMETHING. Cop's and teachers can only do so much. Bullying is a power-struggle. Win the battle,and move on. You can do it. Just don't kill the kid once you have the power, or the cycle never ends.

[Modphase 1,270]

Well, there used to be some kids that made fun of me, but as soon as I started playing basketball they thought I was really good so I'm bullied no longer. I don't know if it works for everyone....

[~Sugar Sprinkles~ 637]

Through all my elementary and middle school years, yes I have been bullied. I was a little different and weird. I always dozed off and had thoughts about weird things. I wasnt into barbies like most of the little girls. I was into video games a lot. I was however I loner sometimes. I had only a few friends and had bad luck making them. Middle school, I got gossiped about a lot..which I dont know why since I never spoke to much people..but it happened. People did say I was ugly..which I do admit, i wasnt a looker back in the day. I loved anime and furries and junk, which most people did not like. It was always who is sexier, who is prettier, who has SWAG. I never had that. Highschool got better for me, but people still do gossip and make passing comments