Disliking your friends after time passes

[chirox the pony 1,334]

Have you ever known someone you thought you were going to be good friends with for the rest of your life but immediately afterwords or overtime began to hate that person. Well this is the topic to talk about the times in your life where friendship hasn't been so magic.

[ponytheorist 181]

I had this happening to me. 

 

When I was on elementary school, I knew a guy called Mart. We became good friends and hung out a lot after school. He eventually moved, but I still had good contact with him. 

 

That changed when I hadn't seen him for over 6 months. I called him again and we decided to get together. It was then that I realized he had become a total douchebag. He was disrespectful to his parents and on certain times mean to me. After that, I broke contact with him. I never called him and he never called me back. This was 5 years ago

 

The funny part is that according to my parents, he was always disrespectful towards his parents and all that. I guess that because I didn't see him for such a long time, made me see his faults

Edited September 23, 2014 by ponytheorist

[碇 シンジン 27,427]

When friendship isn't magic it isn't friendship, because those so called 'friends' are not part of the friendship. They are only 'friends' because they want to benefit from you or just have some fun. I wouldn't call them friends maybe buddies but not friends. Friend is someone you trust and you know that they trust you. Friends are there when you need them most, friends are there to help you. If they really were your friends I don't think you could hate them. Hate is harsh I wouldn't hate even my enemies. 

 

I think that If you have discovered true friendship you know it's magic. It just is. And even if some friend of yours say something bad to you or something like that. The friendships magic will erase that. It may hurt for a while  or a long time, but those strong friendships are hard to broke. It's not like you can befriend everypony and expect all those friendships last forever. That is not the case

 

You need to be kind and accepting even if your friend makes a mistake or fault, but there are no reason for friending people who won't accept you the way you are. I mean you can try to befriend them but I don't think that those friendships are real. 

 

Friendship is like you were bound together with rope. Once you get farther from your friend the rope comes more tight and when you are close it becomes more loose.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

Most of my school friends i don't talk to anymore. It's not "hate" i just don't talk to them.

On that note if i could i would delete this thread only for the negativity it inspires. Nothing against the OP but i just feel like this.

[Guest]

Well there was this one guy I though me and hi could be friends but after some time i didn't really like seeing him I guess it's cause he kept hitting me in the stomach and was like kinda crazy anyway he moved somewhere else and I haven't seen him sense and don't really want to see him again... I hope that doesn't make me a bad person

[SwigglySwiggly 358]

When the magic of friendship dies out, I choose one of these options:

Shoot it OR Get magic defibrillators.

If any of the two attempts fail, I'll abort the project immediately and head towards the nearest available nuclear shelter.

 

Drop it or try to revive it  ( I get carried away sometimes)

Edited September 23, 2014 by SwigglySwiggly

[Darker 1,351]

I've had at times friends who later disappeared and I didn't know of them anymore or simply went on with their lives in another part of the country. 

 

My best choice was, and still is to not have friends. Friends slow me down. They're just more shadows following me, and I already have one.

 

The same happens with love.

[Mrbrunoh1 2,990]

It has happened to me many times in the past, I usually take the all my friendships seriously and always do everything to keep me always with my friends, but many of my "friends" have spoken ill of me behind my back or mocked for ridiculous reasons, many people who were close to me has changed me by others just because I'm not a very popular guy. 

 

I had a very close friend who I always helped him and we were very close, but since I was very hurt and could not do things I thought college was going to help me when I discovered that he did not like me was just me using ... But I think my guilt is very kind to people...

[Corn Knight 26]

Can we turn this into a image gallery?

[Invincible 2,090]

In two different instances iv'e discovered quite the gap overtime with two people who i considered close friends. The first one was a friend i met in first grade... after 3rd grade we became bitter enemies and never spoke to each other again. I met him years later, and we sorta reconciled, but we're too different and we'll never become as close as we were in childhood.

 

The other is a bit more complicated manner. It's a "friend" that me and a group of other friends pushed away. It's because this person is poisonous and destructive, not only to himself but to our group. For lack of a better term, he's a parasite. He's lazy, and would much rather ask other people to do stuff for him than to actually work or get off his butt. He would often mooch and exploit off of you when he's in trouble and would initiate guilt trips in order for you to cover him, but when you need him the most he would turn his back on you. He never hesitates to remind you that you're his "closest friend" when you're hanging out, but here's a secret: He does this with everyone, and everyone is his "closest friend".

[碇 シンジン 27,427]

In two different instances iv'e discovered quite the gap overtime with two people who i considered close friends. The first one was a friend i met in first grade... after 3rd grade we became bitter enemies and never spoke to each other again. I met him years later, and we sorta reconciled, but we're too different and we'll never become as close as we were in childhood.

 

The other is a bit more complicated manner. It's a "friend" that me and a group of other friends pushed away. It's because this person is poisonous and destructive, not only to himself but to our group. For lack of a better term, he's a parasite. He's lazy, and would much rather ask other people to do stuff for him than to actually work or get off his butt. He would often mooch and exploit off of you when he's in trouble and would initiate guilt trips in order for you to cover him, but when you need him the most he would turn his back on you. He never hesitates to remind you that you're his "closest friend" when you're hanging out, but here's a secret: He does this with everyone, and everyone is his "closest friend".

 

I don't believe in things like best friends or closest friends, because I think that you shouldn't value some of your friends higher than others.

 

 

 

And I have actually had situation earlier in my life where my friendship has been tested. I had this 1 friend who was close to me (only friend I had). One day my friend decided to make new friends with some random guys and dragged me into it too. I saw instantly that those guys weren't my type of guys, but I still tried to befriend them because of my friend wanted to. Some weeks went by and I didn't really like their style at all they were those bullies and I didn't like that. I don't know if that showed someway or another but one day the horror happened. Those my friends were now bullying me and that only friend I had before this he was with them and that THAT hurt me A LOT I cried 3 days and I sent messages to my old friend and he said that he didn't like the stuff that they were doing either. He said that he was only doing it because he was following them. That was a relief. I felt so warm inside my friend didn't stab me into the back. I was so happy but I was still hurt. Those guys who were behind this all said sorry, but I hated them still some time.

 

Now I've gotten over that and I don't hate them anymore and I feel bad because I did.

[Vox 870]

I have a sort of love/hate relationship with a buddy of mine, often time he comes to me for support when he's feeling down or defeated. Unfortunately, often times when he's feeling down he uses me as an emotional and zealous punching bag, often going on hour-long rants about The Bible and how the inerrant truths present within it should be accepted by all without question. His apparent denial or proven scientific truths make me grit my teeth while listening to these zealous speeches. Of course I don't want to seem insensitive to his feelings, so I try to refrain from arguing as best I can. Don't get me wrong, I respect some of his beliefs and infatuation with sacred scripture, but I often think he's taking It in too much of a literal sense. Regardless, his life isn't going to great right now, as the rants have become more frequent, I fear is May further complicate an already delicate friendship situation.

[Invincible 2,090]

@@ooBrony, I feel for you, buddy. Nobody should get dragged through these things. As for the concept of "close" friends, idk. It's not some friendship value i assign to people that increases or decreases, being close is basically how comfortable i feel around a person to reveal secrets and other things that may trouble my mind. I don't share these things with people who i feel i don't know well enough.

[碇 シンジン 27,427]

@@ooBrony, I feel for you, buddy. Nobody should get dragged through these things. As for the concept of "close" friends, idk. It's not some friendship value i assign to people that increases or decreases, being close is basically how comfortable i feel around a person to reveal secrets and other things that may trouble my mind. I don't share these things with people who i feel i don't know well enough.

 

Yea I should've probably said in my post but I meant like saying that "your my closest friend" I mean people can think that way and I actually think that way too, but using it in speech to make someone feel kinda superior compared to others that's what I meant. I think there are other aspects where you can see how close you are without words.

[Invincible 2,090]

Yea I should've probably said in my post but I meant like saying that "your my closest friend" I mean people can think that way and I actually think that way too, but using it in speech to make someone feel kinda superior compared to others that's what I meant. I think there are other aspects where you can see how close you are without words.

 

Yes. Regardless, sharing secrets and things you often keep from others is a common practice among friends. And it really hurts when your secrets are freely discussed by a friend like some cheap gossip. That's a lesson i learned the hard way.

[Treble Bolt 1,122]

I have a sort of love/hate relationship with a buddy of mine, often time he comes to me for support when he's feeling down or defeated. Unfortunately, often times when he's feeling down he uses me as an emotional and zealous punching bag, often going on hour-long rants about The Bible and how the inerrant truths present within it should be accepted by all without question. His apparent denial or proven scientific truths make me grit my teeth while listening to these zealous speeches. Of course I don't want to seem insensitive to his feelings, so I try to refrain from arguing as best I can. Don't get me wrong, I respect some of his beliefs and infatuation with sacred scripture, but I often think he's taking It in too much of a literal sense. Regardless, his life isn't going to great right now, as the rants have become more frequent, I fear is May further complicate an already delicate friendship situation.

Sounds like someone is too ignorant to accept anything they don't want to agree with. That's the trouble I find most with "religious" people...they don't know what they say they know. And this is coming from a Theologian who is still learning post degree. 'If you can't listen to others, you shouldn't be talking.'

 

Every female friend I ever made in school turned their back on me and males were just mean...I am very 'anti' friend making now...someone has to earn my trust. I can't tell you how many times I've been stepped on and taken advantage of. And I am no doormat. People have brought me to trust them and then slap me in the face with their words (near or away from me) or do something that utterly abandons me or even puts me in troublesome situations. The friends I have now, excluding my husband, I am very distant with. i don't mind being an adviser or mediator, but I don't take sides unless it utterly conflicts with my worldview.

[Vox 870]

Sounds like someone is too ignorant to accept anything they don't want to agree with. That's the trouble I find most with "religious" people...they don't know what they say they know. And this is coming from a Theologian who is still learning post degree. 'If you can't listen to others, you shouldn't be talking.'

 

Every female friend I ever made in school turned their back on me and males were just mean...I am very 'anti' friend making now...someone has to earn my trust. I can't tell you how many times I've been stepped on and taken advantage of. And I am no doormat. People have brought me to trust them and then slap me in the face with their words (near or away from me) or do something that utterly abandons me or even puts me in troublesome situations. The friends I have now, excluding my husband, I am very distant with. i don't mind being an adviser or mediator, but I don't take sides unless it utterly conflicts with my worldview.

I agree, he's actually asked me if I believe he's overthinking The Bible, I told him he's actually UNDERTHINKING it. Now, not very religious myself, I believe that the Bible has much more to offer than simply it's quite irrational literal sense.

[Caleb Rosengard 889]

When friendship isn't magic it isn't friendship.

This quote.

 

I'm currently 22, since I was 14 I had this friend named Loviisa, I loved her, I really loved her, sometimes more than as a friend, sometimes solely as a friend.

 

She was pretty awesome, a well-read woman, pretty fun...

 

Until I stopped talking with her for a while and started noticing how annoying everything about her is, such as her constant need for blaming people for her life conditions (which aren't even bad), how easy she was manipulated by other people's opinion and, mainly, the fact she actually got mad at me because I was cheering for Germany in the World Cup, when Germany kicked Brazil's ass 7-1 (Note, we're both Brazilians), she, as my friend, could at least respected me and my preferences, but instead she kept on ranting, saying I was the manipulated one by the media, that I should study more politics, that I should love my country... I dropped a f-bomb and that was the last time we talked

 

Funny thing is... I don't miss her, funny how I can not miss someone once I loved so much.

Edited September 23, 2014 by Caleb Rosengard

[ShintX 180]

For me usually its just finding someone who is cool to be with, play games, watch movies whatever works. If one feels its a good connection and is fun then you have found yourself a friend.

 

Its just something that happens, sometimes one can get so mad at each other over small stuff, but the next day its all forgotten, it helps to get the anger out when one gets filled by it at the moment and not just ignoring it, it helps to release it on something. For me when i was mad, i just played games by myself and it made me feel better and forgot why i was mad in the first place. When i feel that i have done something wrong, then i just say sorry and its alright again.

Edited September 23, 2014 by ShintX

[ponytheorist 181]

 

It has happened to me many times in the past, I usually take the all my friendships seriously and always do everything to keep me always with my friends, but many of my "friends" have spoken ill of me behind my back or mocked for ridiculous reasons, many people who were close to me has changed me by others just because I'm not a very popular guy. 

 

I had a very close friend who I always helped him and we were very close, but since I was very hurt and could not do things I thought college was going to help me when I discovered that he did not like me was just me using ... But I think my guilt is very kind to people...

 

Dude, I'm sorry to hear that. And let me tell you: It's not your fault. You were and are not to blame in this, your so called friends were. 

[Mrbrunoh1 2,990]

Dude, I'm sorry to hear that. And let me tell you: It's not your fault. You were and are not to blame in this, your so called friends were. 

 

Thank you, always have someone with whom I can count, I always see the best in people and I hope they see the same in me 

[BastementSparkle 20,312]

My experiences with friendship have never been the most positive. People tend to not particularly like my actual personality. I can admit this is partially my fault. I tend to get a bit obsessive or overly-excited about things, I can be a bit paranoid, or insensitive to others feelings. My interests are almost always on the strange side and my humor can be a bit offensive or gross. I can be a bit moody and unpleasant at times.

 

 But I'm an accepting person in a lot of ways. Nothing much freaks me out or makes me uncomfortable. The only thing that can really bother me is things that are harmful to myself or others. Despite my strange quirks and personality I like to make others feel comfortable and welcomed, even though I'm not usually all that good at it. My insensitivity is more caused by a strange personality and difficult time understanding others.

 

 Most people back in school just preferred to either ignore me, or torment me. They would call me names, throw rocks, or do other various things to try and upset me. I'll admit that for a time I had a very bad temper because of this. There were some people that tried to be my friend, but grew to dislike me over time. I can't fault them for that, but it certainly didn't help me feel better about myself. I've had "friends" that lasted only because I lied to them. I put a mask on that hid who I really was. This made them like me, not for me, but for my mask. I even put that mask on around my family. I still wear it.

 

 When the mask came off they usually didn't want anything to do with me after that. They weren't used to it and it made them feel uncomfortable. I think I did have a real friend back then, at one point. But I changed, and he changed. And we didn't really understand each other anymore.

 

 My parents always were the kind of people that didn't like the idea of me talking to others online. So, they'd always warn me against it. I followed that advice for a very long time before I finally couldn't help it anymore. I signed up here.  It worked. I've found some people I can call friends. I still don't feel completely comfortable around all of them, but I've let some of my mask slip off so they could see and they haven't abandoned me. One person here I'd even call my best friend, because he's seen more than anyone else and still hasn't left.

 

 I just felt like I needed to post this. I've been stressed about something to do with friendship for the last few days and I thought commenting here might help a bit. I think I feel a little bit better now. Though that's likely a temporary feeling, it's still helped a little bit. Hopefully the problem is resolved soon.

[Clarity 3,094]

 

 

I don't believe in things like best friends or closest friends, because I think that you shouldn't value some of your friends higher than others.

The truth is, people always value some people more than others. It's how it goes. It's like how you'd value your family above me, because I'm a total stranger to you, and that's perfectly normal. Despite what some people think, you always subconsciously rank people in your mind. It's the honest truth that I value some friends more than others, because these friends have given to me more than other friends did, and I see no reason why I can't value them more. They're just better people in my eyes. 

 

Anyway, for me, friendship hasn't been a very good thing most of the time. When I was in middle school, I made friends with a group of girls. At first it was all fine and dandy; but that was before they started openly calling me "annoying" and giving me the cold shoulder. By eighth grade I became more secluded and reserved. I glared at everyone and made my body posture clear that they were not worth my time. Because people just don't like it when I'm a happy and energetic girl who doesn't care about popular music. They can't accept me. That carried on over to high school, where people were more mature and less rude, but still quite distant. I haven't a single person at school who I'd actually call a legit friend, but that doesn't matter, because I do have friends outside of it. They're the ones who don't care about my taste in music, and who didn't mind my energetic nature. I consider myself lucky for having such friends.

[chirox the pony 1,334]

Well I once knew this kid for a very short time, I remember when I first met him he was Okay but that all changed when he came over to my house, I believe it was March or February of 2011. That day ruined any potential long term friendship, the kid and his family clearly had no clue how to act around other people(especially when they were guests at other peoples homes). The kid himself was just a bully type, he kept asking me about my weight and overall was just unpleasant to be around, his sister kept annoying my guinea pig and the mother wouldn't stop talking. They treated our house like it was there house, in the end they where at our house from I believe twelve in the afternoon till ten at night, I made it repeatedly clear that I wanted them to go but they pretty much refused to leave. After that I just lost all contact with them, the last time I saw said kid was at tesco in January of 2012(and he was still asking me about my weight), thankfully I haven't heard from him since.

[Sazama Ichida 2,354]

I have a friend who I've known for several years now. Me and him used to pretty much be best buddies. But then I started to see how freaking spoiled he was...He is so selfish...He's rich and spoiled and always gets what he wants and always wants to do things his way...If he was anymore spoiled he'd be like Diamond Tiara...